Storm Brewing Free verse
The other side of the storm.14 total reviews
Comment from Tonulak
Dear dallas Alice, this was an excellent poem describing the storm's gather kenetic energy. My only suggestion is that you used "its" a singular possessive where you refered to clouds, so I think it should be "their". Otherwise, a really fine free verse--Ted
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2012
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Dear dallas Alice, this was an excellent poem describing the storm's gather kenetic energy. My only suggestion is that you used "its" a singular possessive where you refered to clouds, so I think it should be "their". Otherwise, a really fine free verse--Ted
Comment Written 05-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2012
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Thanks, Ted. I corrected, thanks for the keen observation.
Dallas Alice (ha ha)
Comment from Meta~Mark
beseeching the brewing storm - love the B words here ..
altered acerbic atmosphere. great alliteration in the A theme..
rain rain come today :) excellent
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2012
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beseeching the brewing storm - love the B words here ..
altered acerbic atmosphere. great alliteration in the A theme..
rain rain come today :) excellent
Comment Written 04-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2012
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Thank you for the great review.
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Thank you for the great review.
Comment from Joan E.
I could hear, feel and see the scene. I particularly was taken by your "thermal tarpaulins" image and their personification. Your use of alliteration adds to the intensity as well. Scary! -Joan
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2012
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I could hear, feel and see the scene. I particularly was taken by your "thermal tarpaulins" image and their personification. Your use of alliteration adds to the intensity as well. Scary! -Joan
Comment Written 04-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2012
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Thanks . Did you see the moon tonight? The 31st is the Blue Moon. Two full moons this month.
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Unfortunately, no--we had fog on the coast. I heard about the two full moons--maybe tonight will be better. -J
Comment from Starlit Ink
"Thunderclouds loomed low, hovering their black bulk"
I liked those lines which were dramatic and have great imagery and alliteration. I like it when a poem takes the reader right to the scene like this one. The dramatic picture and coloring enhanced it also.
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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"Thunderclouds loomed low, hovering their black bulk"
I liked those lines which were dramatic and have great imagery and alliteration. I like it when a poem takes the reader right to the scene like this one. The dramatic picture and coloring enhanced it also.
Comment Written 03-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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Thanks for the great review.
Comment from Mai Mai
I found this to be an interesting piece. While I felt the storm could have had a metaphorical sense to it, it was still very enjoyable. The storm is well defined and I believe this is a nice piece. Good luck.
Mai Mai
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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I found this to be an interesting piece. While I felt the storm could have had a metaphorical sense to it, it was still very enjoyable. The storm is well defined and I believe this is a nice piece. Good luck.
Mai Mai
Comment Written 03-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Janice Canerdy
Your well-written poem vividly describes the atmosphere of threat and anticipation when the earth would be glad to withstand a storm to get some rain. Very good
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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Your well-written poem vividly describes the atmosphere of threat and anticipation when the earth would be glad to withstand a storm to get some rain. Very good
Comment Written 03-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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Thank you for the kind review. That was what I was shooting for, the dichotomy.
Comment from amused muse
I like the flow of the writing and the imagery presented in the theme. The reader can actually feel and experience the storm. Nice job and thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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I like the flow of the writing and the imagery presented in the theme. The reader can actually feel and experience the storm. Nice job and thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 03-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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Thank you for reviewing and welcome to fanstory.
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Thank you for reviewing and welcome to fanstory.
Comment from ScarletClearwater
Nice job as you threw some alliteration in there. Great job with this piece. It was very vivid and Lovely in imagery. Nice work!
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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Nice job as you threw some alliteration in there. Great job with this piece. It was very vivid and Lovely in imagery. Nice work!
Comment Written 03-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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Thank you
Comment from artemis53
Great piece, Dallas and I love the color and artwork. My favorite verse is the last for the rivers waiting to be filled again.
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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Great piece, Dallas and I love the color and artwork. My favorite verse is the last for the rivers waiting to be filled again.
Comment Written 03-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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Thanks for reviewing.
Comment from Dawn Munro
Magnificent imagery evoked by the use of beautiful, powerful language here - e.g.'s L loved - 'shrill keening', 'wended its way', 'beleaguered valley below', 'denude of energy', 'beseeching' - (gosh, do you think I liked it? LOL) Stunning free-verse, great presentation!
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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Magnificent imagery evoked by the use of beautiful, powerful language here - e.g.'s L loved - 'shrill keening', 'wended its way', 'beleaguered valley below', 'denude of energy', 'beseeching' - (gosh, do you think I liked it? LOL) Stunning free-verse, great presentation!
Comment Written 02-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012
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Thank you so much for the great detailed review. Appreciate it.
