Comment from Margaret Snowdon

Excellent

A short chapter
but so full of action.

Trell inches [t] toward
You'll be safe there[.](,)" Sadie chorts
into Sadie('s) mid-section

Magenta-red blushed from head to toe, staggering from the blow, Sadie feels for the side of a booth - this sentence doesn't sound quite right to me...
Blushing magenta-red from head to toe, Sadie staggers from the blow and feels for the side of a booth - what do you think??

hundred's of
hundreds of
Run, my brothers, [R](r)un,"

Margaret

 Comment Written 04-Feb-2012

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reply by the author on 04-Feb-2012

I tried to delete this and the site says that the entire book will delete. Again, I'm caught in some nightmare. I never edited it or posted it. Did it go to your box?

Comment from Janie King

Excellent

This must be some adventure writing this book...it takes a strong individual...my stuff is simple and milk toast compared to this book. God bless.

 Comment Written 04-Feb-2012

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reply by the author on 04-Feb-2012

Thank you Janie for looking this over. I'm glad you can see it. It has disappeared from my site. Can you tell me if Chapter 15 ever posts. I don't think the site sent out PM's on it. I'm trying to get Tom to do it. Thank you

Comment from Tina55

Excellent

Great escape attempt by the boys. You stir up some of your sentence structure, which i like! I am reviewing this on my kobo, so it will be shorter than the norm.
Great pace and detail. It never stops moving.
I only have one suggestion:

Suggest: Blushed magenta red...

Good work!!

Tina

 Comment Written 03-Feb-2012

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reply by the author on 03-Feb-2012

I don't know how you found this I can't even retrieve it. Thank you for reading. You'll see a bit of it in 17. The site is releasing my chapters without me. When I save it the first time it is released. That's why no pictures on Alliance.

reply by Tina55 on 03-Feb-2012

Are you saving it in preview mode first, where only you can see it? Perhaps the site is misreading your intension. There are glitches now and then. Grrr. :-;

reply by the author on 04-Feb-2012

Yes, I am saving it in preview mode first. I've done that with 14 chapters with no problem til now. It is a site problem. They didn't send out PM's on Chapter 15 either.

Comment from Gungalo

Excellent

Oh wow, now they are getting brave, eh? Well if anyone deserves it Sadie does. She's had her way for far too long. Good for them. I cannot wait to see what is next BD.

 Comment Written 03-Feb-2012

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reply by the author on 03-Feb-2012

This was a partial chapter that got released so you have a preview. I have to put up chapter 15 first and finish this one. so It is quite a rush. I don't know how to do this. I've disabled this one. Can I put it up anytime after Chapter 15 or is there a time limit on it? Also, I have to add to it. What a mess. Can I add to it? HELP!

reply by Gungalo on 03-Feb-2012

Ohhh I don't have the slightest idea, BD.

reply by the author on 03-Feb-2012

I hate to write, Tom. Guess, I have to.

reply by Gungalo on 03-Feb-2012

Yeah I guess so.