Steve's Story-Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Smiler Jack"A collection of my poems
75 total reviews
Comment from rosehill (Wendy)
Well Stevie my boy'o, despite the fact that I am a huge fan, believe me when I say this is a masterful poem. A riveting story, sweet rhyme and rhythm and never for a minute did I wonder at the length. The choosings of the PTB's (Powers That Be) are often a mystery to me. I compare the winners with my own and many I have read and wonder at the criteria. But there is no understanding taste and what calls to one may bore another. I can't imagine that there was a better entry than this. --unless I was in the contest too (not a winner in this category either) - Wendy
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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Well Stevie my boy'o, despite the fact that I am a huge fan, believe me when I say this is a masterful poem. A riveting story, sweet rhyme and rhythm and never for a minute did I wonder at the length. The choosings of the PTB's (Powers That Be) are often a mystery to me. I compare the winners with my own and many I have read and wonder at the criteria. But there is no understanding taste and what calls to one may bore another. I can't imagine that there was a better entry than this. --unless I was in the contest too (not a winner in this category either) - Wendy
Comment Written 10-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2013
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Thanks, Wendy for the great review and the six stars.
Not really a grouse about the contest judging, although, like you, I am a little mystified sometimes. I don't think this even got onto the podium.
I would like to see them give a little feedback perhaps privately if they have found weaknesses or publicly for their top 3 or 4 picks. The committee presumably considers all entries seriously and probably creates a shortlist and makes notes - how hard could it be to compile something to explain their judgement and give hints for entrants in future contests.
Steve
Comment from Titan Black
Wow! That was one hard life, before God decided to
save that man. Even though you may think the woman
save him. Anyway, that was a very vivid picture you
painted. Keep writing.
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Wow! That was one hard life, before God decided to
save that man. Even though you may think the woman
save him. Anyway, that was a very vivid picture you
painted. Keep writing.
Comment Written 07-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you.
Steve
Comment from Nuad1
I absolutely loved this poem. How you did not win with it boggles my mind as I just loved it . . now the alternative, realistic ending I agree with you on: unfortunately it probably IS the way the story would end today BUT I so loved the hope/happy ending in the original copy. We lack "snappy/happy endings" anymore so I love 'em EVEN if they are just in a poem.
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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I absolutely loved this poem. How you did not win with it boggles my mind as I just loved it . . now the alternative, realistic ending I agree with you on: unfortunately it probably IS the way the story would end today BUT I so loved the hope/happy ending in the original copy. We lack "snappy/happy endings" anymore so I love 'em EVEN if they are just in a poem.
Comment Written 07-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thanks so much for the kind words and the six stars. These site contests are very difficult to win. I have managed one win in a sonnet contest, but would love to pick one up for this category.
Steve
Comment from Hareem.S
This is a very well written story with a different accent. It kept me engaged till the end. i love the lucid manner in which in flows. Enjoyed it much.
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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This is a very well written story with a different accent. It kept me engaged till the end. i love the lucid manner in which in flows. Enjoyed it much.
Comment Written 07-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thanks, Hareem.
Steve
Comment from poeticpatchwork
I really like your story poem, especially the 1st ending! It has a great plot and flows really well! I think the committee may have got that vote wrong! Thanks for bring it back out to share!
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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I really like your story poem, especially the 1st ending! It has a great plot and flows really well! I think the committee may have got that vote wrong! Thanks for bring it back out to share!
Comment Written 07-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Ha! I always think the committee gets it wrong! Except for the one miraculous sonnet contest where they got it right.....
Thanks for the review.
Steve
Comment from DALLAS01
Sorry I don't have a six left. Have no idea what beat you out but I think this is a real gem. The rhyme and rhythm is spot on and the story great. Not sure which ending I like but I think it is the second.
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Sorry I don't have a six left. Have no idea what beat you out but I think this is a real gem. The rhyme and rhythm is spot on and the story great. Not sure which ending I like but I think it is the second.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you - I'll take the virtual six.
These site contests are very difficult to win. I have managed one win in a sonnet contest, but would love to pick one up for this category.
Steve
Comment from Betty Bleen
I really enjoyed reading about Smiler Jack, who shared his words of wisdom with a bloke who was going to give up on life, only to find out Jack was a ghost. Good read! And he helped turn the bloke around.
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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I really enjoyed reading about Smiler Jack, who shared his words of wisdom with a bloke who was going to give up on life, only to find out Jack was a ghost. Good read! And he helped turn the bloke around.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thanks, betty.
Steve
Comment from JeanneHP
Your story poem is fantastic. I enjoyed every word of it. I'm glad you used the ending you did. We need more to make us feel good. The cadence reminds me of Robert Service's poem, "The Shooting of Dan McGrew", one of my and my Dad's all-time favorites. Great job! :-)
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Your story poem is fantastic. I enjoyed every word of it. I'm glad you used the ending you did. We need more to make us feel good. The cadence reminds me of Robert Service's poem, "The Shooting of Dan McGrew", one of my and my Dad's all-time favorites. Great job! :-)
Comment Written 06-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Than, Jeanne.
I am a fan of Robert Service also. I think my favourite would be 'The Cremation of Sam Magee.' Banjo Patterson is another who could roll out a good, flowing tale, quite often tongue in cheek and frequently hilarious.
Steve
Comment from Tonulak
Hmmmm....I don't know, but this would have been a very impressive entry if I had been the judge. The poem was lengthy but I didn't notice because the flow and story was so good. that's really crucial in a story/poem...Brilliant job with nice "downunder" seasoning--Ted
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Hmmmm....I don't know, but this would have been a very impressive entry if I had been the judge. The poem was lengthy but I didn't notice because the flow and story was so good. that's really crucial in a story/poem...Brilliant job with nice "downunder" seasoning--Ted
Comment Written 06-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Ted, thanks for the kind words.
Steve
Comment from Lady Veloce
I thoroughly enjoyed the addition of the Australian accent and found it a unique feature in your poetry. The story-line is very complex--not what one would expect from a poem--but very well received.
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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I thoroughly enjoyed the addition of the Australian accent and found it a unique feature in your poetry. The story-line is very complex--not what one would expect from a poem--but very well received.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you, my Lady.
Steve