His Wife
A conflicted man and his sick wife35 total reviews
Comment from talented150
A unique and well-written poem that pulled me into the story. It is sad that they could not or would not communicate, and when she did, it was too late. If he had been a loving husband, he wouldn't be feeling guilt now, nor the wrath of her father. The moral is: Be strong and true through tough times and you'll eventually have your reward. (My opinion, anyway.)
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A unique and well-written poem that pulled me into the story. It is sad that they could not or would not communicate, and when she did, it was too late. If he had been a loving husband, he wouldn't be feeling guilt now, nor the wrath of her father. The moral is: Be strong and true through tough times and you'll eventually have your reward. (My opinion, anyway.)
Comment Written 05-Sep-2024
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Seems he learned the truth about his wife, his wandering ways, and her cancer much too late.
Instead, he wanted things he could not have like the risqué dancer.
In jealousy, he removed his wedding ring when he went out.
He is not welcome to his own wife's wake.
At the end, he returns to his lustful ways.
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Seems he learned the truth about his wife, his wandering ways, and her cancer much too late.
Instead, he wanted things he could not have like the risqué dancer.
In jealousy, he removed his wedding ring when he went out.
He is not welcome to his own wife's wake.
At the end, he returns to his lustful ways.
Comment Written 04-Sep-2024
Comment from tfawcus
Well done. An intensely emotional story poem that comes to grips with a not uncommon conflict of interest in a marriage that has waned. Tragic consequences.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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Well done. An intensely emotional story poem that comes to grips with a not uncommon conflict of interest in a marriage that has waned. Tragic consequences.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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, thank you so much, Tony for these wonderful words and for reading and reviewing my poem and forgiving me that extra star
Comment from nomi338
This poignant write points an accusing finger at every husband too consumed with lust for what he does not deserve, to see the treasure that waits patiently at home for him to notice and treasure. When it is gone, it is truly gone, and he will never find a suitable replacement.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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This poignant write points an accusing finger at every husband too consumed with lust for what he does not deserve, to see the treasure that waits patiently at home for him to notice and treasure. When it is gone, it is truly gone, and he will never find a suitable replacement.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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Exactly, nomi. Thank you for your lovely comments and great review
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September 2, 2024 will mark my 51st anniversary.
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Congratulations to the two of you!!
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Thank you.
Comment from Neonewman
This is such a sorrowful piece; that is all too common, I believe. Was she ill with disease or depression, or maybe a combination of both? Too many times our eyes wander.
God bless,
Steve
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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This is such a sorrowful piece; that is all too common, I believe. Was she ill with disease or depression, or maybe a combination of both? Too many times our eyes wander.
God bless,
Steve
Comment Written 31-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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Cancer, I think. It has all the signs of cancer.
Thank you for your wonderful comments
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Yes, it does. My pleasure, my friend.
Comment from Michele Harber
Wow! You certainly know how to tell a story, and how to lead the reader along and make sure he follows every twist and turn. The focus on the dancer made it obvious this was going to be a story about an affair, but the depression and suicide subplot was a complete surprise that added an extra layer of emotion and meaning to your story. It also made the fact that the widowed husband eventually returned to see the dancer that much sadder. Another excellent job!
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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Wow! You certainly know how to tell a story, and how to lead the reader along and make sure he follows every twist and turn. The focus on the dancer made it obvious this was going to be a story about an affair, but the depression and suicide subplot was a complete surprise that added an extra layer of emotion and meaning to your story. It also made the fact that the widowed husband eventually returned to see the dancer that much sadder. Another excellent job!
Comment Written 31-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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Hmmm. I must've done a poor job communicating
he never returned to the dancer after her death at least not in this poem. It ends with the wake
She died of cancer or some other horrible disease. She did not kill herself. She got depressed only because of the cancer and because of his lies.
as she got sicker and sicker with cancer. He stayed away more and more because he couldn't stand looking at her suffer.
Thank you for your usual stellar review and wonderful comments
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I'm sorry if I misread your story. I went back and re-read it, and found the areas that caused my misinterpretation.
The way the reference to the "cancer he denies" was thrown in, without preamble, made me believe you meant "cancer" metaphorically.
Also, your saying, "He swears he didn't have a clue" didn't make me think cancer at all. Sadly, I've known many people who died of cancer, including one I'd visited the day before he passed, and there was no way to miss it. Depression, on the other hand, is often hidden, and much easier to miss.
Perhaps I could/should have picked it up from, "He could not face that she would die, so he withdrew when she would cry," but I took that to mean he never considered she'd go so far as to kill herself, so he didn't take her crying as seriously as he should have.
I took, "Soon after that he stayed away, but, much too late, he's back today," to mean that, after his wife's death, he'd tried to stay away from the other woman, but it was too late. He was already so drawn to her that he had to return.
My reading the poem differently than you intended doesn't take away from what a good poem it is. I actually find it very interesting when writing can be interpreted in more than one way. It simply means that a story works on multiple levels.
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Yes. Thanks
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This is such a sad story Pam, you touched my heart with these regrets. A well rhymed and metered poem and this one is a joy to read, love Dolly x x x x
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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This is such a sad story Pam, you touched my heart with these regrets. A well rhymed and metered poem and this one is a joy to read, love Dolly x x x x
Comment Written 30-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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Thank you for your lovely comments. I think based on your review that you have some sympathy for the husband. So do I. Leaving and going out late at night was all related to her being sick and him not being able to handle it.
Comment from forestport12
This hits home with real life regarding a friend. He wasn't unfaithful to her with women, but she suffered from depression her adult life. When the kids were grown she kept telling her husband she didn't want to be here anymore. She had several failed attempts at suicide and received council. He'd offer to take her on trips and do more with her. She jumped off an interstate bridge, knowing she couldn't swim. She left him with a sense of guilt that he lives with every day, wishing he had done more.... Powerful and memorable.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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This hits home with real life regarding a friend. He wasn't unfaithful to her with women, but she suffered from depression her adult life. When the kids were grown she kept telling her husband she didn't want to be here anymore. She had several failed attempts at suicide and received council. He'd offer to take her on trips and do more with her. She jumped off an interstate bridge, knowing she couldn't swim. She left him with a sense of guilt that he lives with every day, wishing he had done more.... Powerful and memorable.
Comment Written 30-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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Hi. You should tell your friend that he could not do more except to commit her to a psychiatric hospital
People always hesitate to do that but sometimes it's the only way to save the person's life. so now you know so maybe you can save somebody's life in the future
I almost called 911 on my grandson three months ago because he was talking suicide and it was clear that he had schizophrenia and I convinced him to get on medication and now he's doing very well
That's a nice thing that can happen during a psychiatric hospital. Stay, they can actually force you to take the med you need and then once you're released if you keep taking them, you'll do well.
I speak from experience, having had many miraculous saves for my attempts. Now I'm on meds that don't make me feel that way anymore.
However, in this poem, she do not kill herself. She died of cancer or something like that that caused her to lose all the weight and to cry.
I guess you were thinking that the note was a suicide note and maybe that's my fault
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Thank you, especially for the extra star
Comment from Cindy Decker 3
Pam,
Your story has a lot of sorrow, but it brings the reader anger at cheaters. Your words are caustic and biting, befitting a man who was never appreciative of his wife's positives or pain.
Exceptional, Pam.
Best wishes, Cindy
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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Pam,
Your story has a lot of sorrow, but it brings the reader anger at cheaters. Your words are caustic and biting, befitting a man who was never appreciative of his wife's positives or pain.
Exceptional, Pam.
Best wishes, Cindy
Comment Written 30-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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You always have your photo up here? It's nice to see your face.
Thank you for the wonderful comments and you're always great review
Comment from mermaids
Your words read like a mini movie. I feel bad for this lady and how her husband neglected her and was eyeing other women. Excellent poetic form and use of words with a smooth flow and your tale comes through clearly.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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Your words read like a mini movie. I feel bad for this lady and how her husband neglected her and was eyeing other women. Excellent poetic form and use of words with a smooth flow and your tale comes through clearly.
Comment Written 30-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2024
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Thank you for your usual wonderful comments. I appreciate this great of you.