Sight
Poetry10 total reviews
Comment from zanya
Yes a poem that reminds us how important it is to battle on through life whatever the crises we may encounter -believing is all important and vital to our journey also.
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2024
Yes a poem that reminds us how important it is to battle on through life whatever the crises we may encounter -believing is all important and vital to our journey also.
Comment Written 07-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2024
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Thank you so much
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Wow. This is powerful. The feeling of being "lost in the city of angels" is not a comfortable one! The sense of isolation feels so real reading this. You paint such a bleak picture. The determination to endure and see "the morning light" is uplifting at the end. This is well written. Well done!
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2024
Wow. This is powerful. The feeling of being "lost in the city of angels" is not a comfortable one! The sense of isolation feels so real reading this. You paint such a bleak picture. The determination to endure and see "the morning light" is uplifting at the end. This is well written. Well done!
Comment Written 07-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2024
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Thank you for reading and the kind review
Comment from HarryT
I do not see a rhyming patterned in this offering. The draws on emotion, however, it does not seem to follow the rule of writing a rhyming poem. I would question seeing an owl in the city of L.A., but who knows, I guess all is possible.
Re: Rhyme scheme. Night, sight in first two lines rhyme a, a. Night and light in the last two, but night is internal and light external. If this is a contest entry, I believe you need to edit and establish a set pattern.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2024
I do not see a rhyming patterned in this offering. The draws on emotion, however, it does not seem to follow the rule of writing a rhyming poem. I would question seeing an owl in the city of L.A., but who knows, I guess all is possible.
Re: Rhyme scheme. Night, sight in first two lines rhyme a, a. Night and light in the last two, but night is internal and light external. If this is a contest entry, I believe you need to edit and establish a set pattern.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2024
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I'm still learning, but the feedback helps very much to get better. Thank you for the feedback.
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Keep writing, you will get it.
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Thank you for the encouragement
Comment from Bill Schott
This poem, Sight, represents the time when we are out of communication with the familiar people and places which buoy of existence during the times of lonely night.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2024
This poem, Sight, represents the time when we are out of communication with the familiar people and places which buoy of existence during the times of lonely night.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2024
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Thank you for the kind review
Comment from TPAC
In the silent depths of the night
Without a single owl in sight
Lost in the city of Angels
With no insights to guide my way
Just a suggestion, that could enhance this conveyance slightly: in my given viewpoint. Could be totally wrong.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2024
In the silent depths of the night
Without a single owl in sight
Lost in the city of Angels
With no insights to guide my way
Just a suggestion, that could enhance this conveyance slightly: in my given viewpoint. Could be totally wrong.
Comment Written 23-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2024
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Thank you for the feedback and suggestion.
Comment from Patty Mazzurco
Your poem evokes a vivid sense of desperation and resolve set against the backdrop of a night in a metaphorical "city of angels." The contrast between the darkness of the city and the faint hope for morning light effectively captures the struggle between despair and perseverance.
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2024
Your poem evokes a vivid sense of desperation and resolve set against the backdrop of a night in a metaphorical "city of angels." The contrast between the darkness of the city and the faint hope for morning light effectively captures the struggle between despair and perseverance.
Comment Written 20-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2024
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Thank you for the review.
Comment from Colorado Owl
Well done! This really make me wonder about what has happened to cause the situation that you describe, and what will happen next. The stress is palpable!
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2024
Well done! This really make me wonder about what has happened to cause the situation that you describe, and what will happen next. The stress is palpable!
Comment Written 20-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2024
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Thank you for the kind review
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Thank you for the kind review
Comment from karenina
This is a rather foreboding look at how alone night can feel... You start out of the gate with the night/sight rhyme and then close this out with "light" which brings us full circle. I like the unique way you interwove less obvious rhymes throughout. It's very true, isn't it? We can be surrounded by people and yet feel as lonely as can be.
Karenina
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2024
This is a rather foreboding look at how alone night can feel... You start out of the gate with the night/sight rhyme and then close this out with "light" which brings us full circle. I like the unique way you interwove less obvious rhymes throughout. It's very true, isn't it? We can be surrounded by people and yet feel as lonely as can be.
Karenina
Comment Written 19-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2024
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Thank you for the kind review
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Welcome!
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Nice image and presentation, Samantha.
-You wrote a good poem with effective imagery and rhyme.
-I like your opening lines that set the scene, showing
there isn't much to see on this night.
-You do a good job describing how there's no light,
no friends or kindness of people.
-I like the ending section as you persevere
and are encouraged because your will sings to you
and you get through the night to "see the morning light."
-Good luck in the contest.
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reply by the author on 16-Aug-2024
-Nice image and presentation, Samantha.
-You wrote a good poem with effective imagery and rhyme.
-I like your opening lines that set the scene, showing
there isn't much to see on this night.
-You do a good job describing how there's no light,
no friends or kindness of people.
-I like the ending section as you persevere
and are encouraged because your will sings to you
and you get through the night to "see the morning light."
-Good luck in the contest.
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Comment Written 16-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2024
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I thank you for taking time to read my poem and the wonderful feedback.
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You are very welcome.
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☺️
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This sounds like a rather scary experience to be lost in the night and wishing for the morning light. The darkness can seem foreboding here, love Dolly x x x x
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
This sounds like a rather scary experience to be lost in the night and wishing for the morning light. The darkness can seem foreboding here, love Dolly x x x x
Comment Written 15-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2024
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Thank you Dolly