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Viewing comments for Chapter 35 "Spit-shine on Hell"Fantasy based on the intersection of two worlds.
17 total reviews
Comment from rspoet
Hello Rhonda,
I've been off site for awhile.
Another marvelous addition to the present-day story of the rebellion
of Hades and the Olympic gods. The dialogue and tension between Hades
and Echo is very well done.
I suspect the wording "Love's first kiss" and "you may reward it only once" will be the key to the outcome of the Prophesy. (I wonder if 'award' might be slightly better than 'reward')
Nice "cliff-hanger" ending to lead to the next chapter.
Well done. I think readers will be anxiously flipping pages.
Best wishes.
Robert
reply by the author on 31-May-2024
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Hello Rhonda,
I've been off site for awhile.
Another marvelous addition to the present-day story of the rebellion
of Hades and the Olympic gods. The dialogue and tension between Hades
and Echo is very well done.
I suspect the wording "Love's first kiss" and "you may reward it only once" will be the key to the outcome of the Prophesy. (I wonder if 'award' might be slightly better than 'reward')
Nice "cliff-hanger" ending to lead to the next chapter.
Well done. I think readers will be anxiously flipping pages.
Best wishes.
Robert
Comment Written 31-May-2024
reply by the author on 31-May-2024
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Hi Robert, thank you so much for the six stars and comments. I sort of posted these two chapters close together, so they stacked up quickly.
You're right on Award being the better choice of wording.
The love's first kiss part is telling, good call.
Thanks again,
Rhonda
Comment from prettybluebirds
Wow, I love the way you ended this chapter. It guarantees the reader will be back for the next addition to your story. It is nicely written with no errors in sight.
reply by the author on 28-May-2024
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Wow, I love the way you ended this chapter. It guarantees the reader will be back for the next addition to your story. It is nicely written with no errors in sight.
Comment Written 28-May-2024
reply by the author on 28-May-2024
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Wow, thank you so much for the review. I appreciate you, my friend!!
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment from Daylily
Another outstanding chapter, Rhonda. I especially like it any time you mention horses. There is no way to figure what you are going to reveal next, and that is an excellent quality in any writing. Smiles and hugs, Lily
I just noticed one typo here -- "Well, I am feeling a little nauseous just now," Echo said. She put one head (hand) on her forehead and the other on her midsection.
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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Another outstanding chapter, Rhonda. I especially like it any time you mention horses. There is no way to figure what you are going to reveal next, and that is an excellent quality in any writing. Smiles and hugs, Lily
I just noticed one typo here -- "Well, I am feeling a little nauseous just now," Echo said. She put one head (hand) on her forehead and the other on her midsection.
Comment Written 27-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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Thank you so much for the six stars, my friend!! I appreciate it so much!!!
Thanks for finding the typo, too. Too funny, head on head. Oh well...thank goodness for friends with good attention to detail.
Hugs,
Rhonda
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:-)
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! If he makes Echo an immortal, he will have married her, won't he???? This is getting way to dangerous, she needs Theo and the others to come and rescue her. Unfortunately they are busy doing other important things, but if Theo had an inkling of what is going on with Echo, he'd be there in a blink of an eye. You don't think of my heart or blood-pressure, do you, Rhonda!
I love the detail you've given us of her beautiful gown, and he does sound handsome, but it doesn't stop him being evil, does it?
This was a really well crafted chapter, my friend, and a thoroughly good read. Well done. :)) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! If he makes Echo an immortal, he will have married her, won't he???? This is getting way to dangerous, she needs Theo and the others to come and rescue her. Unfortunately they are busy doing other important things, but if Theo had an inkling of what is going on with Echo, he'd be there in a blink of an eye. You don't think of my heart or blood-pressure, do you, Rhonda!
I love the detail you've given us of her beautiful gown, and he does sound handsome, but it doesn't stop him being evil, does it?
This was a really well crafted chapter, my friend, and a thoroughly good read. Well done. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 26-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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Sandra, thank you so much for your beautiful 6 star review!!
Things are about to get worse for Echo before they get better, but, you and your blood pressure can rest assured, things aren't always what they seem. There's a reason Theo feels it's more important to be where he is, searching for who he is.
Yes, Old Hades is a handsome man, and a wicked god, but he does have a heart, lol.
Now, let's see your boys get out of trouble!
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from Pam (respa)
Great artwork, Rhonda. You made Hades look very appealing, as he seems to think of himself. You did a great job with the chapter, as well. It flows smoothly from scene to scene, as well as the dialogue between Echo and Hades.
Echo is feeling down at the beginning of the chapter, and I can't blame her. The man she loves is not the one who is keeping her locked in this room. She allows herself to feel some self pity, but manages to turn away from it and focus on what her situation is, and how Hannah gave her the horse name. This gives her new found courage. The quote you shared fits the situation very well, and Echo is a wise player.
You descriptive detail of the dress and surroundings is excellent and puts the reader in the middle of it. Echo does a good job standing up for herself, but she also knows she has to play a part where Hades is concerned. I'm glad you shared the prophesy; it clarifies the situation involving Theo and Echo.
Good concluding paragraphs, especially Echo's reactions to Hades directive to address those in attendance. Very well done, my friend.
reply by the author on 26-May-2024
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Great artwork, Rhonda. You made Hades look very appealing, as he seems to think of himself. You did a great job with the chapter, as well. It flows smoothly from scene to scene, as well as the dialogue between Echo and Hades.
Echo is feeling down at the beginning of the chapter, and I can't blame her. The man she loves is not the one who is keeping her locked in this room. She allows herself to feel some self pity, but manages to turn away from it and focus on what her situation is, and how Hannah gave her the horse name. This gives her new found courage. The quote you shared fits the situation very well, and Echo is a wise player.
You descriptive detail of the dress and surroundings is excellent and puts the reader in the middle of it. Echo does a good job standing up for herself, but she also knows she has to play a part where Hades is concerned. I'm glad you shared the prophesy; it clarifies the situation involving Theo and Echo.
Good concluding paragraphs, especially Echo's reactions to Hades directive to address those in attendance. Very well done, my friend.
Comment Written 26-May-2024
reply by the author on 26-May-2024
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Pam, thank you so very much for the detailed review and the sparkling six stars! I appreciate both. I'm glad the chapter worked well. I will probably post the next one within the next few days. It was actually part of this one, but I had to trim down the length.
Take care,
Rhonda
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You are very welcome and deserving of the stars and review, Rhonda. Is that a new program you are using for your pictures. I looked it up, but it seemed complicated, but your picture looked natural, and it made Hades look very attractive!
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It's called IZEA. It isn't the best, but gets me more-or-less what I want. It's not as fancy as the one you used to create the scene for Sandra's book, but It's better than just scrolling around for what I want. I agree on making Hades look good, lol. Gotta have a handsome antagonist, after all.
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Thanks for sharing about it. I guess you do have to have a handsome antagonist; he has the personality to go with it. He can also be very appealing and even Echo has to be careful not to fall for it.
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All that glitters is not gold...
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True😊
Comment from barbara.wilkey
There's no way Echo is going to allow that to happen, but I have no clue what's going to happen to stop it. I love the story.
"Well, I am feeling a little nauseous just now." Echo said. (now,)
when Echo interrupted.
"So, that's why Theo stands in your way?" (no space here & interrupted,)
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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There's no way Echo is going to allow that to happen, but I have no clue what's going to happen to stop it. I love the story.
"Well, I am feeling a little nauseous just now." Echo said. (now,)
when Echo interrupted.
"So, that's why Theo stands in your way?" (no space here & interrupted,)
Comment Written 25-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you for the review, comments and finding the spag, my friend!! I'll go make the changes. I appreciate the help!
Comment from BethShelby
Echo seems tp be at the mercy of Hades. I don't know what is envolved in turning a mortal into an immortal but it seemes that is Hades intention. Adam is there hoping to protect her but I guess Hades doesn't know he is there. You story is very exciting and creativie. I'm enjoying itg.
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Echo seems tp be at the mercy of Hades. I don't know what is envolved in turning a mortal into an immortal but it seemes that is Hades intention. Adam is there hoping to protect her but I guess Hades doesn't know he is there. You story is very exciting and creativie. I'm enjoying itg.
Comment Written 25-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you so much, Beth. I appreciate the review and comments. Hades is intent on doing the deed. The next chapter will explain more. I originally wrote it all as one chapter, but it was too long, so split it up.
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment from nomi338
This excellently conceived and well written epic story I believe, would work wonderfully as a series of animated videos. I know several people who would gladly and faithfully watch it to its conclusion. Please tell me that you will consider it. To me it is a classic story that competes well with other stories of its type.
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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This excellently conceived and well written epic story I believe, would work wonderfully as a series of animated videos. I know several people who would gladly and faithfully watch it to its conclusion. Please tell me that you will consider it. To me it is a classic story that competes well with other stories of its type.
Comment Written 25-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you so much, my dear friend. You have brightened my day!!! I would love to see in published/in animated videos. I know how to self-publish and have connections to other venues, but have no clue how to get it in animated videos.
Thank you so much for even suggesting it.
Hugs,
Rhonda
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I have adult children and adult grand children and I can tell you with certainty they would devour this story with passion.
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Awww, I'm so glad!! If you know how to find someone to turn it into animated videos, let me know. Otherwise, I'm going to try to publish it after I get it finished, which won't be much longer. I do appreciate your input!!
Comment from Begin Again
Bravo! Echo has won my heart and her fighting spirit deserves all my "cheering" I can give. She has quite the battle in front of her, but, at least for now, she struggles to remain detached from Hades....BUT.... Will his threat of an upcoming kiss to change her to being immortal actually work or was the blessing meant only for Theo? Great job!
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Bravo! Echo has won my heart and her fighting spirit deserves all my "cheering" I can give. She has quite the battle in front of her, but, at least for now, she struggles to remain detached from Hades....BUT.... Will his threat of an upcoming kiss to change her to being immortal actually work or was the blessing meant only for Theo? Great job!
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 25-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Hi Carol, thank you so much for the six stars. Bravo on still having one!! A weekend blessing. Thank you!!
I think Echo's fate is sealed for the moment, but does it take? Maybe yes, maybe no.
You're the first one to suggest it might not be what Hades hopes, lol. Very intuitive.
Hugs,
Rhonda
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I can imagine how irate he will be if it doesn't work. I'm sure you have it all figured out and it will be amazing.
Smiles, Carol
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Thank you so much!!!
Comment from Ric Myworld
I would have preferred being along from the beginning of your story, but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy stepping in for a chapter here and there of your fine writing. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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I would have preferred being along from the beginning of your story, but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy stepping in for a chapter here and there of your fine writing. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 25-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Hi Ric, I am deeply honored whenever you drop in to review. As I've said before, it's often helpful for someone to let you know how a chapter appears to a person on its own merit.
Take care,
Rhonda