A Sunday Kind Of Love
love soothes30 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Jim,
This is grim and it seems it will get grimmer in the near future for Alan,
It did show that love puts light and hope in your life and that you find it when you least expect it.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Congrats on placing third in the contest.
Have a great weekend.
Joan
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Hi Jim,
This is grim and it seems it will get grimmer in the near future for Alan,
It did show that love puts light and hope in your life and that you find it when you least expect it.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Congrats on placing third in the contest.
Have a great weekend.
Joan
Comment Written 13-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Thank you! Now and then I feel "noir-ish!"
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Don?t we all. Thanks, Jim.
Joan
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Yes, noir and then!
Comment from tempeste
Ciao , you now have 6 votes.
He should have called the police but he panicked.
I'm sure he will get a beating but hopefully in the meantime forensic will help him get out of the pickle he put himself in.
Surely the victim will have some DNA of her aggressor under her nails , and she would have scratched the true killer , right?
Anyway , it is also true that many innocent people are in jail.
The story flowed well For one minute I thought they were going to go out like Thelma & Louise.
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Ciao , you now have 6 votes.
He should have called the police but he panicked.
I'm sure he will get a beating but hopefully in the meantime forensic will help him get out of the pickle he put himself in.
Surely the victim will have some DNA of her aggressor under her nails , and she would have scratched the true killer , right?
Anyway , it is also true that many innocent people are in jail.
The story flowed well For one minute I thought they were going to go out like Thelma & Louise.
Comment Written 08-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Please forgive the delay. I am so thankful to you!
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Nice to hear from you.
I enjoy receiving comments and I don't mind replying until they get too many, then I struggle. (biggrin)
Keep safe!
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There's enough of me for two, but I just can't seem to split. Then I could do twice as much!
Comment from Wendy G
What a short experience of love. A very well written story which included mystery, drama, and love, along with a wild chase. Not a happy ending, but that is true to life. Best wishes for the contest. (I didn't see this one before, I don't believe I was notified.)
Wendy
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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What a short experience of love. A very well written story which included mystery, drama, and love, along with a wild chase. Not a happy ending, but that is true to life. Best wishes for the contest. (I didn't see this one before, I don't believe I was notified.)
Wendy
Comment Written 04-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Please forgive the delay. I fell so far behind. Thanks for kind words. Just give me a yell if you feel I have ignored you. I would never do that!
Comment from Michele Harber
Wow, Jim. This story was riveting. You had me from the first paragraph, which basically set up the entire story. I like the element of mystery, with so many unanswered questions for the reader that it just makes me want to know more. I enjoyed the way you built up the tension and suspense, as well as the brief but evolving relationship between the characters.
Equally interesting--and question-inducing--is your end note. I don't know the circumstance but, if it resulted in your being with us today, I'm glad whoever it was took the blame for whatever it was.
I wish you the best of luck in the Story of the Month contest.
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Wow, Jim. This story was riveting. You had me from the first paragraph, which basically set up the entire story. I like the element of mystery, with so many unanswered questions for the reader that it just makes me want to know more. I enjoyed the way you built up the tension and suspense, as well as the brief but evolving relationship between the characters.
Equally interesting--and question-inducing--is your end note. I don't know the circumstance but, if it resulted in your being with us today, I'm glad whoever it was took the blame for whatever it was.
I wish you the best of luck in the Story of the Month contest.
Comment Written 04-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Please forgive the delay. I fell so far behind. Thanks for kind words. Just give me a yell if you feel I have ignored you. I would never do that!
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I've never felt ignored by you. I also fully understand that you have a life and, sometimes, life gets in the way of socializing. (How rude of it!) We'll talk whenever we both have time, and absolutely no hard feelings when we don't.
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I am grateful for your understanding and friendship.
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Always, Jim, just as I'm grateful for yours.
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To paraphrase "Dr. Strangelove" when Peter Sellers is speaking to the Russian head, "Yes, I know you are grateful. But, I, too am grateful. I can be as grateful as you!" If you haven't seen the movie, forget all this. You wouldn't understand. Thanks for your friendship!
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I've only seen bits and pieces of Dr. Strangelove. My Peter Sellers repertoire goes more along the lines of "The Pink Panther" and its sequels.
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Speaking of which, "The Pink Panther Strikes Again", in which he drives the Chief Inspector crazy, is one of the funniest modern films!
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I was actually just watching that a week ago. I think my favorite, though, is "Return of the Pink Panther."
Remember, Jim, when you answer the fern, be careful not to bimp your head!
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Of course, there's the classic lie from the 2nd film, "A Shot In The Dark:"
"That's a priceless Steinway!"
"Not anymore!"
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I forgot about "A Shot in the Dark!" That's actually the first "Pink Panther" movie I ever saw. I think I like that one better than "Return of the Pink Panther." Because the "Pink Panther" movies have been showing on TV very frequently recently, I've even turned my almost 20-year-old into a fan.
Comment from jessizero
I am so glad I took the time to read this! Your story was entertaining and captivating. I hope you do well in the Story of the Month contest. Thanks for sharing, and best wishes to you.
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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I am so glad I took the time to read this! Your story was entertaining and captivating. I hope you do well in the Story of the Month contest. Thanks for sharing, and best wishes to you.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Please forgive the delay. I fell so far behind. Thanks for kind words. Just give me a yell if you feel I have ignored you. I would never do that!
Comment from gramalot8
I enjoyed your storyline. Your dialogue is very good and believable. I kinda wish their love story could have gone on a bit longer... maybe love winning out in the end. Thanks for sharing this with us and good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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I enjoyed your storyline. Your dialogue is very good and believable. I kinda wish their love story could have gone on a bit longer... maybe love winning out in the end. Thanks for sharing this with us and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Please forgive the delay. I fell so far behind. Thanks for kind words. Just give me a yell if you feel I have ignored you. I would never do that!
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
You tell a really good story and roll it out in good order. However, you have some things you could change. Rarely do you combine two sentences together and you need to do that. Yes, it reads rather like you are racing through life with so many single sentences, but it is rather exhausting to read. Until it is a new speaker, or you have some descriptive sentences that aren't related, combine the sentences. The dotted lines aren't necessary either. Also, there are forgotten quote marks in the sentence that begins: Her lips met . . . She said, (")We don't . . .
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reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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You tell a really good story and roll it out in good order. However, you have some things you could change. Rarely do you combine two sentences together and you need to do that. Yes, it reads rather like you are racing through life with so many single sentences, but it is rather exhausting to read. Until it is a new speaker, or you have some descriptive sentences that aren't related, combine the sentences. The dotted lines aren't necessary either. Also, there are forgotten quote marks in the sentence that begins: Her lips met . . . She said, (")We don't . . .
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Please forgive the delay. I fell so far behind. Thanks for kind words. Just give me a yell if you feel I have ignored you. I would never do that!
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I have had the same problem with
getting things done. I enjoy your writing and think you have great potential to get things published with some polishing. Styles in writing change and reading the best writers here will always help develop skills and reading worst writers will show you what not to do.
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Yes, I have much to learn. I never used to divide sentences like that. I just did it again in a short piece. I will try to avoid that in the future. Also, I am the self-appointed King of Typos, and always need correction there.
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You haven't read a lot of people on here or you'd know you aren't king.
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Sometimes, when there is tension in the story, short sentences bring that out, so short is not always a bad idea.
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I'll try to base the structure on the content of the story and actions of the characters. I just re-arranged a few sentences in my short prose piece today.
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Maybe I'm the jester.
Comment from nomi338
Running away is almost always a bad idea. Facing up to allegations is always a better idea than running away from accusations. The truth almost always eventually come to the fore, even if it takes years to appear, this is better than being killed while running away.
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Running away is almost always a bad idea. Facing up to allegations is always a better idea than running away from accusations. The truth almost always eventually come to the fore, even if it takes years to appear, this is better than being killed while running away.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Please forgive the delay. I fell so far behind. Thanks for kind words. Just give me a yell if you feel I have ignored you. I would never do that!
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Please believe me, I have no problem with late replies to my review comments. I get a lot so I am not bothered by a late response.
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Thank you for your understanding!
Comment from lyenochka
What a story, Jim! You had love and death and wild chase scene. And we believed their innocence even though I kept wondering if we would find out something else about them that would change our opinion of the lately found lovers. Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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What a story, Jim! You had love and death and wild chase scene. And we believed their innocence even though I kept wondering if we would find out something else about them that would change our opinion of the lately found lovers. Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2024
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Please forgive the delay. I fell so far behind. Thanks for kind words. Just give me a yell if you feel I have ignored you. I would never do that!
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No worries, Jim! We're all "behind" so you can tell me if you feel I've ignored you!
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I appreciate your understanding and welcome your words!
Comment from Ric Myworld
Well, you can't say Alan and Molly were lucky, that's for sure. But a "Sunday Kind of Love" for even a few minutes gave them a little hope. Your last line is a little bit misleading. "This may seem a bit grim to post on Easter Sunday, but I owe my life to one who took the blame for me." LOL. Great job and best of luck in the contest. Wish I had a six. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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Well, you can't say Alan and Molly were lucky, that's for sure. But a "Sunday Kind of Love" for even a few minutes gave them a little hope. Your last line is a little bit misleading. "This may seem a bit grim to post on Easter Sunday, but I owe my life to one who took the blame for me." LOL. Great job and best of luck in the contest. Wish I had a six. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2024
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Thank you so much for your kind words!