endless
Abrief description of life from from a refugee's pov3 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
Hi Cass! I see this was posted last year and somehow I've been missing your posts. This is a very sad poem and I hope those who are refugees will have the hope of a future with children that God will give them. Your poem reminds me of the devastation in Gaza that has gone on much too long.
How are you? Did you get a new computer?
  |
Hi Cass! I see this was posted last year and somehow I've been missing your posts. This is a very sad poem and I hope those who are refugees will have the hope of a future with children that God will give them. Your poem reminds me of the devastation in Gaza that has gone on much too long.
How are you? Did you get a new computer?
Comment Written 04-May-2024
Comment from JSD
A slightly strange poem which needs a bit of an edit to make it work properly in my opinion. It's not four lines - you need to split up your last line. You also need to split the word, 'Lo' from the next word as it looks like Lol, which I don't think is the mood you are aiming for. Something like this?:
Alone? Not for long.
Lo! I am with child.
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2023
|
A slightly strange poem which needs a bit of an edit to make it work properly in my opinion. It's not four lines - you need to split up your last line. You also need to split the word, 'Lo' from the next word as it looks like Lol, which I don't think is the mood you are aiming for. Something like this?:
Alone? Not for long.
Lo! I am with child.
Comment Written 18-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2023
-
You're quite right, that's exactly where I was
going with this piece. Somehow I've pressed the wrong key and made an even bigger mess than in the first place. We'll put it down to a bad hair day.cheers Cass
Comment from Bryce 1
Your kid has died but its ok because you're pregnant? I am confused after a few reads but that is probably because I am either looking at it from a wrong angle or it simply surpasses my intellect. Creative!
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2023
|
Your kid has died but its ok because you're pregnant? I am confused after a few reads but that is probably because I am either looking at it from a wrong angle or it simply surpasses my intellect. Creative!
Comment Written 18-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2023
-
this piece was posted before
being edited. my bad.sorry.
the title refers to the endless cycle of existence this woman lives. one by one all her children have succumbed to disease or hunger and now all her tears are dry, allshe wants to do is to crawl into the last child's grave and be still,
but she cannot do even that because she has just learned she is tpobear another child