A Fall With Grace
Haiku x 4 (3rd place)17 total reviews
Comment from harmony13
The author's words are unique, interesting, descriptive and creative. Thank you for the author's notes - they help me to see the deeper meaning in these words! I enjoyed the scene created by the author's words. The poem flow and connect well. The artwork is awesome!
Great Poem!
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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The author's words are unique, interesting, descriptive and creative. Thank you for the author's notes - they help me to see the deeper meaning in these words! I enjoyed the scene created by the author's words. The poem flow and connect well. The artwork is awesome!
Great Poem!
Comment Written 28-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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Thank you, Harmony. Your reviews are always appreciated. ~DDxo
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello,
Haiku is my favorite kind of poem. Your haiku suite is beautiful. The fall theme flows between all the haiku.
Good syllables count and connection between lines. Beautiful presentation and imagery.
Good luck!
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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Hello,
Haiku is my favorite kind of poem. Your haiku suite is beautiful. The fall theme flows between all the haiku.
Good syllables count and connection between lines. Beautiful presentation and imagery.
Good luck!
Comment Written 28-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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Thank you, GBR. Your comments are always appreciated. ~DDxo
Comment from royowen
This is a classical poetic utterance with the autumnal season in focus, I would normally only write a one stanza haiku at a time, but this is chockablock with several great stanzas, well done, good luck, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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This is a classical poetic utterance with the autumnal season in focus, I would normally only write a one stanza haiku at a time, but this is chockablock with several great stanzas, well done, good luck, blessings Roy
Comment Written 27-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Thank you, Roy. Your review on my stack haiku made me smile. I appreciate you. ~DD
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Well done
Comment from Emily Barrett
I read your poem first and was going to note about how I thought your use of the word affair was a really nice choice here and gave some strong images, but then I read your notes and realized the story within. How smart! I am really loving the double story here. The crafting of these words was done really well.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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I read your poem first and was going to note about how I thought your use of the word affair was a really nice choice here and gave some strong images, but then I read your notes and realized the story within. How smart! I am really loving the double story here. The crafting of these words was done really well.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Thank you so much, Emily, for taking the time to read my haiku stack twice to fully appreciate the double entendre. Unfortunately it has passed over some reviewer's heads but such is life. Thank you also for the shiny sixers adding a smile to my day :-) ~DDxo
Comment from Sarah Das Gupta
This series of haiku is unusual. Usually haiku stand alone or with prose. Usually the third line carries the most weight which is generally true here. I think it works well and too often we agonise about form, syllable, and metre.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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This series of haiku is unusual. Usually haiku stand alone or with prose. Usually the third line carries the most weight which is generally true here. I think it works well and too often we agonise about form, syllable, and metre.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Well said, Sarah. I appreciate your comments and observations on my haiku stack. Offering more than one haiku into the - no rules contest - allows for a story told without restrictions. Have a great week. ~ DD
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Best wishes from UK
Comment from Sugarray77
I was one of the ones that needed to read it twice, DD. Great job with the writing, but the notes really helped me to enjoy it. I guess her name is Rose... but, what do I know! Haha. Great write.
Melissa
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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I was one of the ones that needed to read it twice, DD. Great job with the writing, but the notes really helped me to enjoy it. I guess her name is Rose... but, what do I know! Haha. Great write.
Melissa
Comment Written 27-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Thank you Melissa for reading my haiku stack and reading it twice.
As for the name in question - nice try. Close but not quite. Have a look at my title. Her name is there :-) ~DDxo
Comment from lyenochka
Wow! This is like four poems in one. Each is a strong haiku in itself. My favorite was:
tall trunk stands naked
as crimson cloak falls to ground
deep feeding of soil
The nakedness of the tree is revealed as the "crimson cloak" falls but it's not a fruitless falling but one that serves to feed the soil as autumn and winter will give way to spring with nourishment from these leaves.
Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Wow! This is like four poems in one. Each is a strong haiku in itself. My favorite was:
tall trunk stands naked
as crimson cloak falls to ground
deep feeding of soil
The nakedness of the tree is revealed as the "crimson cloak" falls but it's not a fruitless falling but one that serves to feed the soil as autumn and winter will give way to spring with nourishment from these leaves.
Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 27-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Thank you, Helen. I appreciate your supportive review on my stack haiku. Have a great week. ~DDxo
Comment from Sally Law
Loving this creative stacked haiku. You carried the image so well from one stanza to the next. It is so refreshing. I wish we would have more of these haiku variations. Marvelous entry for the contest, DD!
Sal XOs
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2023
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Loving this creative stacked haiku. You carried the image so well from one stanza to the next. It is so refreshing. I wish we would have more of these haiku variations. Marvelous entry for the contest, DD!
Sal XOs
Comment Written 26-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2023
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Thank you, Sally. I appreciate your uplifting review on my stacked haiku. Have a great week. ~DDxo
Comment from CrystieCookie999
This has great subject matter and very readable wording. I caught all kinds of poetic techniques like personification with the dancing, the cloak dropping, the blanket and bed being used, as well as 'd' alliteration in the first line of the last haiku. I had a place I stumbled a bit: for the word 'goldent' I think you mean 'golden' as goldent didn't show up as a real word on a search.
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2023
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This has great subject matter and very readable wording. I caught all kinds of poetic techniques like personification with the dancing, the cloak dropping, the blanket and bed being used, as well as 'd' alliteration in the first line of the last haiku. I had a place I stumbled a bit: for the word 'goldent' I think you mean 'golden' as goldent didn't show up as a real word on a search.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2023
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Thank you so much, Crystie, for picking up on the wee typo. Can't believe I missed it after reading my own work too many times. I appreciate your keen eye. ~DDxo
Comment from AP Apgar
I like your for stanza Haiku - Excellent picture presentation of leaves with cutout hearts - cute - Poem as good syllable count and connection between lines - suggest that you use a (-) at the end of the second line in haiku - a pause before your satori (enlightening remark connecting to the first line). Poem from my perspective is telling a story about the leaves in fall perhaps, falling - like a crimson cloak/cloud from the tree leaving it naked - leaves will eventually return to the soil and feed the tree -observers mind remembering the tree in all it beautiful fall leaves - Good Job. AP
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2023
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I like your for stanza Haiku - Excellent picture presentation of leaves with cutout hearts - cute - Poem as good syllable count and connection between lines - suggest that you use a (-) at the end of the second line in haiku - a pause before your satori (enlightening remark connecting to the first line). Poem from my perspective is telling a story about the leaves in fall perhaps, falling - like a crimson cloak/cloud from the tree leaving it naked - leaves will eventually return to the soil and feed the tree -observers mind remembering the tree in all it beautiful fall leaves - Good Job. AP
Comment Written 26-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2023
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Thank AP - I am pleased you popped in to review my haiku stack. The post isn?t completely about autumn, as you may think. It is all a play on words - including the title - and relates to a steamy and sensual affair on a bed of leaves that happens one fine day in fall? and guess the name of the woman so thought of?
