More Grist to the Mill
Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "Days of Derring Do"Book 2 of the Cleeborough Mill Trilogy
33 total reviews
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
The story of Thomas Warburton is ambiguous. The talk of a possible suicide wish gives us pause. Then the reason why he joined the army hints a little, that the answers he gives are not true. How would Peter Allen ever come to a conclusion about this subject?
Ralf
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2021
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The story of Thomas Warburton is ambiguous. The talk of a possible suicide wish gives us pause. Then the reason why he joined the army hints a little, that the answers he gives are not true. How would Peter Allen ever come to a conclusion about this subject?
Ralf
Comment Written 23-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2021
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Maybe he won't. Life is full of ambiguities and inconclusiveness. Lol. Many thanks for reviewing.
Comment from Lucy de Welles
Beautiful. Written with elegance and eloquence. I always love to be a spectator in the port and conversation dance of two Englishmen. It's featured in movies often, and is fascinating to Americans. We never do this sort of dance. A gentleman's dance, I suppose. Americans just cut right to the chase.
"What did you come here to tell me?"
"Blah. blah. blah."
"Great! If there's nothing further, see you later."
Great read, as always!
Lucy
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2021
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Beautiful. Written with elegance and eloquence. I always love to be a spectator in the port and conversation dance of two Englishmen. It's featured in movies often, and is fascinating to Americans. We never do this sort of dance. A gentleman's dance, I suppose. Americans just cut right to the chase.
"What did you come here to tell me?"
"Blah. blah. blah."
"Great! If there's nothing further, see you later."
Great read, as always!
Lucy
Comment Written 12-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2021
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Many thanks for this interesting review. I am on record here as saying it was my intention to write a literary novel, one where the characters drive the plot which is why this dance (lovely expression by the way) is necessary.
That is how the plot was in fact conceived, on long fog walks in open country where no one but my dog, Penny was privy to my rehearsals out lord of these dances.
You are the first reviewer to comment in this way, and I thank you from the bottom of my literary heart.
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One hears of "auditory" and "visual" and "kinesthetic" learners. But I have always learned by talking. To myself and to others. Sometimes I spend hours explaining whatever I'm thinking about, to myself. Makes it all fall into place. People used to say it was a sign of insanity. Now it's been proven to be a sign of higher cognitive functioning and intelligence! So glad of that.
I'm glad to see that I'm in good company and I'm sure that Penny thinks it's just fab!
Isn't it interesting that those who are the most garrulous can also be the most quiet and meditative?
Have a great day in wonderful Wales!
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How great to meet a fellow traveller!
Comment from padumachitta
Hi
Well, a good accounting of these fellows. I felt like they actually lived and were in the trenches.
I could see the one guy, Warburton, he was for me, the central casting in this chapter.
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2021
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Hi
Well, a good accounting of these fellows. I felt like they actually lived and were in the trenches.
I could see the one guy, Warburton, he was for me, the central casting in this chapter.
Comment Written 04-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2021
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Thank you for this review. Warburton and his actions are certainly central to this part of the story.
Comment from tfawcus
You've created the atmosphere beautifully here, Jim. Comfortably elegant dining in the house of an Edwardian gentleman. Shades of Mess dining and the unwritten conventions of the day. The relationship between these two is a comfortable one and their conversation makes an excellent vehicle for transmitting backstory.
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
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You've created the atmosphere beautifully here, Jim. Comfortably elegant dining in the house of an Edwardian gentleman. Shades of Mess dining and the unwritten conventions of the day. The relationship between these two is a comfortable one and their conversation makes an excellent vehicle for transmitting backstory.
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
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Ah yes, those were the days. Many thanks for this six star review. I am glad you picked up on the atmosphere it is one that we never saw in Book 1 at the mill or even Jericho Farm. I think the setting is sometimes as important as the characters and their actions.
Comment from Pam (respa)
-This is an excellent chapter
and deserving of a six.
-The dialogue flows smoothly,
and the discussion is riveting.
-I enjoyed learning about Tom and
his service to his country.
-We learn a lot about his character-
how he is unassuming, doesn't seem
to want the spotlight, or even a promotion.
-He does his job and is content with it.
-There must have been some connection
in his mind regarding the Col. since he agreed
to take the promotion for him.
-There are several possibilities-Arthur or
maybe his own father, but I don't
remember if he really knew him. The
other one would be Heather.
-When the rector explains the neck,
I think Tom was remembering the ordeal
with Hettie; it had to have left a major
impression on him.
-I am glad you included the story, but
I'm pretty sure Allen has other ideas
about the whole significance of Tom's action.
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
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-This is an excellent chapter
and deserving of a six.
-The dialogue flows smoothly,
and the discussion is riveting.
-I enjoyed learning about Tom and
his service to his country.
-We learn a lot about his character-
how he is unassuming, doesn't seem
to want the spotlight, or even a promotion.
-He does his job and is content with it.
-There must have been some connection
in his mind regarding the Col. since he agreed
to take the promotion for him.
-There are several possibilities-Arthur or
maybe his own father, but I don't
remember if he really knew him. The
other one would be Heather.
-When the rector explains the neck,
I think Tom was remembering the ordeal
with Hettie; it had to have left a major
impression on him.
-I am glad you included the story, but
I'm pretty sure Allen has other ideas
about the whole significance of Tom's action.
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
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Thank you so much for this complimentary and in depth review. It is much appreciated.
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You are very welcome. It was a very good chapter. This Peter Allen is a very intriguing character! I like his style.
Comment from Mary Kay Bonfante
This is a most excellent chapter in your developing story. I love the title, "Days of Derring Do," because Thomas Warburton truly died a hero's death, regardless of whether he had a death wish. The story is well told here, in your dialogue between the two men.
Your copy is very clean, however I recommend the following minor revision. If the error merely reflects a difference in British vs American idioms, then please disregard it:
Charles Thorpe, on other hand, now burned with curiosity, ...
-->
Charles Thorpe, on the other hand, now burned with curiosity, ...
I like the way the clergyman is able to shed some light on the meaning of Warburton's last words, even though it's only a clue.
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
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This is a most excellent chapter in your developing story. I love the title, "Days of Derring Do," because Thomas Warburton truly died a hero's death, regardless of whether he had a death wish. The story is well told here, in your dialogue between the two men.
Your copy is very clean, however I recommend the following minor revision. If the error merely reflects a difference in British vs American idioms, then please disregard it:
Charles Thorpe, on other hand, now burned with curiosity, ...
-->
Charles Thorpe, on the other hand, now burned with curiosity, ...
I like the way the clergyman is able to shed some light on the meaning of Warburton's last words, even though it's only a clue.
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
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Thank you so much for this six-star review. You are quite right about that definite article. It had seemed to have gone walkabout but it is back in place now.
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You're very welcome, Pantygynt. You are very funny, as you have me imagining a definite article going "walkabout." I have been meaning to ask you where you got the name "Pantygynt." Where does it come from, or what does it mean, if you don't mind my asking? (I'm sure I'm not the first one.) Blessings, Mary Kay
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Thank you for your query. Pantygynt is the name of my house in Wales. More correctly it is written Pant-y-Gynt which translates from the Cymraeg as Hollow-of-the-Wind. It has been corrupted though as Gynt does not exist in Welsh as a noun. It seems that a W has gone walkabout as the Welsh for wind is Gwynt. So with a free translation the place might be called Windy Hollow. This is odd though as it is very sheltered as far as wind is concerned. My given name however is Jim!
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Thank you so much, that's a fascinating history! A windy hollow, that's actually sheltered, a "w" gone walkabout, and your given name is "Jim." Would you rather be called Pantygynt, or Jim? - Mary Kay
Comment from robyn corum
Jim,
Nicely done. It seems your older men have a round-the-world way of telling a story, but that may be due to the alcohol and easy company. *smile*
Only one note:
The conversation went, as I remember, something like this:'
--> his speech continues so no q mark here
Thanks!
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
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Jim,
Nicely done. It seems your older men have a round-the-world way of telling a story, but that may be due to the alcohol and easy company. *smile*
Only one note:
The conversation went, as I remember, something like this:'
--> his speech continues so no q mark here
Thanks!
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
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Thank you for this lovely review. Yes , I know I need to knock that quote out. Thanks for reminding me,
Comment from Iza Deleanu
I like this passage it reminds me of a similar custom in Romania: "It's an old agricultural custom, part of a ritual carried out by the first farm to bring its harvest home. The farmer ties a knot from the corn in the last sheaf cut - That is what is known as The Neck; don't ask me why - and it is brought home with due ceremony. Afterwards it was carried to the church where it remained for the year. They haven't done it here for years, not since mechanisation, the threshing machine, brought threshing out of the barn and into the harvest field. Sorry, Peter. Folklore is one of my things. Perhaps your man had taken part in the ritual as a younger chap.
" Thank you for sharing and good luck with the next chapter.
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
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I like this passage it reminds me of a similar custom in Romania: "It's an old agricultural custom, part of a ritual carried out by the first farm to bring its harvest home. The farmer ties a knot from the corn in the last sheaf cut - That is what is known as The Neck; don't ask me why - and it is brought home with due ceremony. Afterwards it was carried to the church where it remained for the year. They haven't done it here for years, not since mechanisation, the threshing machine, brought threshing out of the barn and into the harvest field. Sorry, Peter. Folklore is one of my things. Perhaps your man had taken part in the ritual as a younger chap.
" Thank you for sharing and good luck with the next chapter.
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
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Many thanks for this review. Harvest customs around the world tend to to have some similarity, related of course to the crops to which they refer, so I wasn't surprised a similarity with Romania here on the Welsh borders.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
I read and have enjoyed the, so orderly narrated taletelling, fostered by fairly progressed plot development, contributed by realistic dialogues, ended with a resolved conclusion; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
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I read and have enjoyed the, so orderly narrated taletelling, fostered by fairly progressed plot development, contributed by realistic dialogues, ended with a resolved conclusion; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
Comment Written 02-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
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Many thanks for reading and reviewing this.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
i enjoyed reading this next section of the conversation, but I hope Warburton has something to do with the plot. Seems like a lot of talk if he isn't. Got to admit I do not know what the north-west territories were. In last paragraph I don't think the phrase "wreathed in thought" works as wreathed almost always is used with smiles or joy. Best of luck with this.
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
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i enjoyed reading this next section of the conversation, but I hope Warburton has something to do with the plot. Seems like a lot of talk if he isn't. Got to admit I do not know what the north-west territories were. In last paragraph I don't think the phrase "wreathed in thought" works as wreathed almost always is used with smiles or joy. Best of luck with this.
Comment Written 01-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2021
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You are at a disadvantage having come onto the scene at the very end of the first book of the trilogy in which Warburton played a major part. The North West Frontier is known today as Afghanistan and was a hive of unrest in the days of empire, as much as it is today. In this trilogy I have always been more concerned with the characters and the reasons for their actions rather than the plot development. In that sense it is more literary fiction. The 'chapters' here relate to groups of around 1,750 words, which I have discovered is all the average reviewer is prepared to undertake. When it goes forward to publication the chapters will be much longer and will be seen to possess their own unity - at least I hope so.
I had a look through some of your other reviews today. Clearly you know what you are doing and you use the star grades as they were intended. You will undoubtedly upset people with those threes and fours but I think you should earn the respect of the more serious writers, who respect informed criticism.
Thank you for this well-considered review.