Fire Inside
A short poem162 total reviews
Comment from words
I like your first 5/7/5:
You light a lost spark
You pour embers from your heart
You're fire in the dark
You created a vivid image with just a few words.
I like your first 5/7/5:
You light a lost spark
You pour embers from your heart
You're fire in the dark
You created a vivid image with just a few words.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2012
Comment from harmony13
Great 5-7-5 poem! I liked this poem! The first two lines connected well. And the last line said so much! The
artwork and color scheme you chose enhanced the read.
Thank you.......harmony13
Great 5-7-5 poem! I liked this poem! The first two lines connected well. And the last line said so much! The
artwork and color scheme you chose enhanced the read.
Thank you.......harmony13
Comment Written 11-Jun-2012
Comment from Cobalt Blue
A 5-7-5 should rarely come easily. If it does it is probably crap. They seem easy to write by the newcomer but the truly good ones are well thought out with several layers of meaning which may not be easily discerned with one read. You are off to a good start.
A 5-7-5 should rarely come easily. If it does it is probably crap. They seem easy to write by the newcomer but the truly good ones are well thought out with several layers of meaning which may not be easily discerned with one read. You are off to a good start.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2012
Comment from MumEsGirl
You have done a great job for a first attempt. This poem is alive and escriptive. I am no expert on format or grammar, but I know a good poem when I read one
hugs
kate
You have done a great job for a first attempt. This poem is alive and escriptive. I am no expert on format or grammar, but I know a good poem when I read one
hugs
kate
Comment Written 11-Jun-2012
Comment from gordonmrln
I can see you have studied the words and content you have put into this poem and the expression it gives is so thoughtful.It like you are saying to the reader this person who you have written about sparked a light in your soul,and the more you feel for this person the more brighter the embers glow.This is my take on your words my friend,as for giving critique I am sorry but I am not one of those people that strip a poem bare and dissect it to its bones.I am of the believe that when you put a poem up for review its because you have created a piece of work that you have spent time composing.And that piece of work should be judge on its merit and how it appeals to the individual.What gives any person the right to judge and condemn a piece of poetic art if they dislike it then don't review it.to me its that simple.But I really like your work my friend and I can see that there is an underlining passion for what you feel I thank you for letting me have a glimpse of the inner you.Thank You my Friend.
I can see you have studied the words and content you have put into this poem and the expression it gives is so thoughtful.It like you are saying to the reader this person who you have written about sparked a light in your soul,and the more you feel for this person the more brighter the embers glow.This is my take on your words my friend,as for giving critique I am sorry but I am not one of those people that strip a poem bare and dissect it to its bones.I am of the believe that when you put a poem up for review its because you have created a piece of work that you have spent time composing.And that piece of work should be judge on its merit and how it appeals to the individual.What gives any person the right to judge and condemn a piece of poetic art if they dislike it then don't review it.to me its that simple.But I really like your work my friend and I can see that there is an underlining passion for what you feel I thank you for letting me have a glimpse of the inner you.Thank You my Friend.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2012
Comment from pnkglo
The poem Fire Inside is an interesting 5-7-5 poem. I like the alliteration In the first line- light, lost. I like the sound of the s sounds in lost, spank, embers. I also the use of personification of your poem. pnkglo
The poem Fire Inside is an interesting 5-7-5 poem. I like the alliteration In the first line- light, lost. I like the sound of the s sounds in lost, spank, embers. I also the use of personification of your poem. pnkglo
Comment Written 11-Jun-2012
Comment from ShannyT
I think this is a nice poem. I don't have any critiques really. I like that you were able to make it rhyme as well as keep the syllable count. Nice job, great poem.
I think this is a nice poem. I don't have any critiques really. I like that you were able to make it rhyme as well as keep the syllable count. Nice job, great poem.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2012
Comment from Kelleigh
Well done for a first try...I find that this style of poetry is far more difficult than first thought as well...trying to fit a story within the syllabic restrictions...You did a great job describing love, how it ignites a fire within and lights a darkened path. Good work, and good luck in the contest!
~Kelleigh
Well done for a first try...I find that this style of poetry is far more difficult than first thought as well...trying to fit a story within the syllabic restrictions...You did a great job describing love, how it ignites a fire within and lights a darkened path. Good work, and good luck in the contest!
~Kelleigh
Comment Written 11-Jun-2012
Comment from Lady Valor
This reads so smooth i love it. Only thing Is i believe your last line is a 6 instead of a 5. "Fi'yer". That would be my only concern, especially for the contest. Hate for you to not win over a technicality. The picture compliments your work so well also. thank you for sharing!
This reads so smooth i love it. Only thing Is i believe your last line is a 6 instead of a 5. "Fi'yer". That would be my only concern, especially for the contest. Hate for you to not win over a technicality. The picture compliments your work so well also. thank you for sharing!
Comment Written 11-Jun-2012
Comment from pinkdove
Awww this was beautifully written...straight from the heart...it made me smile and I wouldnt change a thing about it. Thanks so much for sharing (:
Awww this was beautifully written...straight from the heart...it made me smile and I wouldnt change a thing about it. Thanks so much for sharing (:
Comment Written 11-Jun-2012