A Lasting Peace Without the Tears
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "Martyr!"Simply my feelings towards a lasting one.
93 total reviews
Comment from JeffreyStone
Still climbing those mountains. This portrays very well the anger and misled motives for blowing up the civilized world and even Muslims (though unsaid) who get in the way. Very interesting read. I notied one error during my read: you misspelled "sacrifice -( sacrific you) about third stanza down. JS
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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Still climbing those mountains. This portrays very well the anger and misled motives for blowing up the civilized world and even Muslims (though unsaid) who get in the way. Very interesting read. I notied one error during my read: you misspelled "sacrifice -( sacrific you) about third stanza down. JS
Comment Written 17-Feb-2008
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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I know and have fixed my errors. Thank you very much for your compliments, observations and this review.
Comment from Juleeann
I thought this was well-written and came straight from your heart. It moved and motivated me to look through the veil of the "press" and see people for who they really are--just people.
You might enjoy a couple of poems I have up "Generation Why?" and "Almost Heaven" --no pressure.
Again, I thought this was an amazing read. Good job, carry on.
Juleeann
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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I thought this was well-written and came straight from your heart. It moved and motivated me to look through the veil of the "press" and see people for who they really are--just people.
You might enjoy a couple of poems I have up "Generation Why?" and "Almost Heaven" --no pressure.
Again, I thought this was an amazing read. Good job, carry on.
Juleeann
Comment Written 17-Feb-2008
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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I am very glad that this poem has inspired you suchly. Thank you very much for your compliments and this review and I have made a note to look at your poems at a later time.
Comment from FredCollingwood
I think you summarized it for many in your second stanza:
My enjoyment is of murder
and mayhem, keeping me alive.
I wrap myself in any cause
for attention, even religion,
as to my ends I strive.
Many just like to kill. Others do it, because it's how they can get power. They justify it by saying it's for religeous reasons, but more often lately, "martyrs" have been found to simply doing it for money.
great poem.
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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I think you summarized it for many in your second stanza:
My enjoyment is of murder
and mayhem, keeping me alive.
I wrap myself in any cause
for attention, even religion,
as to my ends I strive.
Many just like to kill. Others do it, because it's how they can get power. They justify it by saying it's for religeous reasons, but more often lately, "martyrs" have been found to simply doing it for money.
great poem.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2008
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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Thank you very much for your compliments and this review. I do believe that you are absolutely correct, in your assessment.
Comment from Norzah
A very powerful disclaimer on the use of the word 'martyr' for those who died upholding a faith but killing innocent people. True, the terrorists and suicide bombers have killed thousands - including members of their own fatih - and causing considerable destructions in this world. But the war against them are doing the same. There seem to be no victory for anyone in sight as the world rocked with brutalities and bloodbaths. Should earthlings fight on or find a solution for peaceful living?
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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A very powerful disclaimer on the use of the word 'martyr' for those who died upholding a faith but killing innocent people. True, the terrorists and suicide bombers have killed thousands - including members of their own fatih - and causing considerable destructions in this world. But the war against them are doing the same. There seem to be no victory for anyone in sight as the world rocked with brutalities and bloodbaths. Should earthlings fight on or find a solution for peaceful living?
Comment Written 17-Feb-2008
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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I believe that our involvement in the fighting is regrettable, yet very necessary and many Muslim nations are understanding and appreciative, though they may not openly say it. The problem with terrorism is that it is a tyranny and done behind closed doors. There can be no quarter given and if you look at the history, peace they agree to is only used so they can gain in strength and hit us harder. On a small national scale, look at Isael and Gaza. Both sign a cease fire agreement, then the rockets come into Isreal. Isreal ignors this until they can't, then they are judged to be the agressors. Terrorism is not a county to be condemned by the United Nations. If I was a leader, I would sign the agreement and below that signature would add, "So much as one suicide bombing or rocket that enters into my borders will result in the destruction of 1/4 of the territory, if it happens agian, you will loose it all." I would make those leaders have to choose, which side they are actually on. This has to do with sovernity of free nations. All should enjoy, but for a new history, you have to forgive. Terrorists never will and will take from the slice of history that suits them.
But you have to do as you say. On a global scale, you get them out of Afgahnistan, they invade Pakestan. Or flee to Europe or come here. All people's of this world have to be proactive, not reactive in our vigilance.
Thank you very much for your compliments and this review. I have met people from your country and they have been very kind and gracious to me. If I am not mistaken, I also believe that your nation has been exposed to these types of acts as well.
I am not talking about a war againt Muslim's but one against a tyranny known as terrorism. "Should earthlings fight on or find a solution for peaceful living?" War should be hated, but surely, there are times when we must fight to protect our beliefs, principles and sovernty. Be it as a person, household, city or town or a nation and in the case of terrorism, a world. My thoughts for peace are penned in, "[The Longest] World Poem For Peace." Again, thanks and this review is very valued.
Comment from jeaniep
I am giving you a six star mainly because of the message of the poem and authors notes. I think you have put my feelings as well as many other's feelings into words others can relate to.
I didn't find anything to point out in the poem. It flows well and is very strong. That is another reason I'm giving you a six...
I did find a few things in the authors notes, however.
"whether it be from these Bazaar bombings"
I don't know why you capitalized bazaar unless the bombing occurred in a bazaar, but still not sure it needs to be capitalized. I'm not sure on that one though...
"or a nation lead by strict adherents who way view their beliefs as the only way."
I don't understand the reason for the word way... "who way view" maybe you could drop the way "who view their beliefs..." or change it to "who weigh their beliefs..." maybe I'm missing something and if I am, I'm sorry.
"redefining, "martyr," is a grave unjust and a mistake."
This one... I think it would sound better as "is a grave injustice and a mistake." or " is grave, unjust and a mistake."
"people who kill (murder, meaning deliberate-other then self-defense), "
I believe it should be... "deliberate-other thAn self-defense" Then suggests time...
I thought I saw something with the word they in here somewhere too, but I can't find it now. Ha, ha. Probably my imagination. However, I put that in here, just in case it's not and you'll be able to find it later.
Again, GREAT POEM and GREAT POINT!
Thank you for writing this!
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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I am giving you a six star mainly because of the message of the poem and authors notes. I think you have put my feelings as well as many other's feelings into words others can relate to.
I didn't find anything to point out in the poem. It flows well and is very strong. That is another reason I'm giving you a six...
I did find a few things in the authors notes, however.
"whether it be from these Bazaar bombings"
I don't know why you capitalized bazaar unless the bombing occurred in a bazaar, but still not sure it needs to be capitalized. I'm not sure on that one though...
"or a nation lead by strict adherents who way view their beliefs as the only way."
I don't understand the reason for the word way... "who way view" maybe you could drop the way "who view their beliefs..." or change it to "who weigh their beliefs..." maybe I'm missing something and if I am, I'm sorry.
"redefining, "martyr," is a grave unjust and a mistake."
This one... I think it would sound better as "is a grave injustice and a mistake." or " is grave, unjust and a mistake."
"people who kill (murder, meaning deliberate-other then self-defense), "
I believe it should be... "deliberate-other thAn self-defense" Then suggests time...
I thought I saw something with the word they in here somewhere too, but I can't find it now. Ha, ha. Probably my imagination. However, I put that in here, just in case it's not and you'll be able to find it later.
Again, GREAT POEM and GREAT POINT!
Thank you for writing this!
Comment Written 17-Feb-2008
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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Thank you very much for this review and your compliments. I have made some of the corrections that you recomend. Only too happy to fix something that provides a better clarity.
Comment from phild
Excellent job. The poem was well written, giving a terrifying look into the mine of a terrorist. Your commentary which followed the piece was right on. Thank you for sharing this.
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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Excellent job. The poem was well written, giving a terrifying look into the mine of a terrorist. Your commentary which followed the piece was right on. Thank you for sharing this.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2008
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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Thank you very much for this review and your compliments.
Comment from cmay44
HI Mike
This is awesome and your author notes are straight to the right point and I adhere to your beliefs and say AMEN! to all you have penned and your poem is wonderful . Great poem, picture and package and the message is exactly what the world needs to realize. Great job of relating the message.
God bless you my friend.
love from
Carolyn ** I would go back and correct typos in your author notes for then it's worth a 6star review.
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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HI Mike
This is awesome and your author notes are straight to the right point and I adhere to your beliefs and say AMEN! to all you have penned and your poem is wonderful . Great poem, picture and package and the message is exactly what the world needs to realize. Great job of relating the message.
God bless you my friend.
love from
Carolyn ** I would go back and correct typos in your author notes for then it's worth a 6star review.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2008
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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I did do several corrections. Thank you very much for your input, compliments and this review. Also my God bless you as well!
Comment from JoAnna Lee
THANK YOU!!!!! You nailed this but good, and I agree with you whole-heartedly. Excellent Job... both with your poem and your commentary. KUDOS don't come close...
Thank YOU for sharing,
Donna ( just one mother of a daughter in the USAF )
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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THANK YOU!!!!! You nailed this but good, and I agree with you whole-heartedly. Excellent Job... both with your poem and your commentary. KUDOS don't come close...
Thank YOU for sharing,
Donna ( just one mother of a daughter in the USAF )
Comment Written 17-Feb-2008
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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I appreciate your daughter's service. Thank you very much for this genuinely great review and rating. Also the compliments.
Comment from Chloe
What is chilling about this poem is that it is emotionless. God help us all. Your comments after the poem were however filled with tears. " To honor the innocent Muslim people....."
"Let God decide who's right or wrong......"
Thank you for "seeing."
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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What is chilling about this poem is that it is emotionless. God help us all. Your comments after the poem were however filled with tears. " To honor the innocent Muslim people....."
"Let God decide who's right or wrong......"
Thank you for "seeing."
Comment Written 17-Feb-2008
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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I'm just tired of the wrong people getting credit and attention that they don't deserve and wanted to shed light on the vast majority of people that do and deserve some comfort of understanding. Thank you very much for this review and your compliments.
Comment from ledford
Good job! Great artwork to go with this piece:-)
"faithful as me, in anyway." Should be "any way"
"God's Kingdom as I crave
more and take it farther." Should be "further" since it does not have to do with distance.
Keep up the good work!
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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Good job! Great artwork to go with this piece:-)
"faithful as me, in anyway." Should be "any way"
"God's Kingdom as I crave
more and take it farther." Should be "further" since it does not have to do with distance.
Keep up the good work!
Comment Written 17-Feb-2008
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2008
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Thank you very much for taking the time to review this. I made the corrections.
