All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "Colors of Life"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
85 total reviews
Comment from MumEsGirl
this was a great write. I love the innocence of the child and the comparison between Jesus and Santa.
Why do older people make such a fuss over things like this, as you say God wouldn't be offended it the slightest
hugs
kate
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
  |
this was a great write. I love the innocence of the child and the comparison between Jesus and Santa.
Why do older people make such a fuss over things like this, as you say God wouldn't be offended it the slightest
hugs
kate
Comment Written 19-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
-
thx kate!
Comment from justatuna
I enjoyed this poem and it's message. The style was something I haven't read before. Opened another door for me. I look forward to more of your work.
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
|
I enjoyed this poem and it's message. The style was something I haven't read before. Opened another door for me. I look forward to more of your work.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
-
thx Tuna!
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi Poet,
You have penned a fine poem for the spiritual contest. I love the way you wrote it from the perspective a 7 year old child. You have chosen the perfect words to express this little girl's feelings about Jesus and Santa. It's a creative comparison. Well done and good like in the contest....blessings, chey
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
|
Hi Poet,
You have penned a fine poem for the spiritual contest. I love the way you wrote it from the perspective a 7 year old child. You have chosen the perfect words to express this little girl's feelings about Jesus and Santa. It's a creative comparison. Well done and good like in the contest....blessings, chey
Comment Written 19-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
-
thx chey!
Comment from Janice Canerdy
This is a very interesting,thought-provoking poem. We adults must remember that children don't comprehend as adults do and that, when they liken Jesus to Santa, they aren't being disrespectful--just children!
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
|
This is a very interesting,thought-provoking poem. We adults must remember that children don't comprehend as adults do and that, when they liken Jesus to Santa, they aren't being disrespectful--just children!
Comment Written 19-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
-
thx Janice!
Comment from Dawn Munro
Well, this is a wonderful surprise - with the presentation as it is (which is very attractive and enticing) one does not expect such a profound and powerful poem. Absolutely EXCELLENT!
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
|
Well, this is a wonderful surprise - with the presentation as it is (which is very attractive and enticing) one does not expect such a profound and powerful poem. Absolutely EXCELLENT!
Comment Written 19-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
-
thx Dawn! profound & powerful, hmm? :)
-
You bet! That type of stifling of creative spirit shaped a generation! Some of us were lucky to escape it, and some of us had enough moxy passed on from our parents to resist or even challenge it! But many did not - that's how we wind up with such screwed-up leaders! ha! There's an oxymoron for you - 'political leader'. Damn 'sheep' is more like it! So when they finally DO get elected. gain some power, it goes straight to their egos and the public gets the short end of the stick again. OOO, sorry, my bad! Ranting on your dime. You are welcome. Much deserved praise.
-
you're always welcome to rant on my dime dear - though, of course, you're preaching to the converted! :)
Comment from RaymondJohn
Great job of showing how narrow-minded some people are, even out of the best of motives. You have captured youthful independence in an authentic voice very well. Best of luck in the contest. It should be a strong entry. Ray
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
|
Great job of showing how narrow-minded some people are, even out of the best of motives. You have captured youthful independence in an authentic voice very well. Best of luck in the contest. It should be a strong entry. Ray
Comment Written 19-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
-
thx Ray!
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, mystery writer, you did a great job writing this free verse poem about the lessons of color the child received and what she taught as well. Jesus is many colors combined, i wish you the best of luck in the contest
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
|
this is very well written, mystery writer, you did a great job writing this free verse poem about the lessons of color the child received and what she taught as well. Jesus is many colors combined, i wish you the best of luck in the contest
Comment Written 19-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
-
thx sweets!
Comment from serenae_dc
Nice poem about Jesus :) It's funny and innocent at the same time. I wouldn't have used italics though - although you may have found it necessary, it got a little distracting.. and yes, i agree (re: your last line), He doesn't mind at all :)
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
 |
Nice poem about Jesus :) It's funny and innocent at the same time. I wouldn't have used italics though - although you may have found it necessary, it got a little distracting.. and yes, i agree (re: your last line), He doesn't mind at all :)
Comment Written 19-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
-
thx serenae - italics are used because this is a prose/dialogue poem - kindly see the review guidelines if you would (as per below) and please note that if you award four stars, you are expected to say what needs adjustment or improvement. If not, then please re-rate ok? I see you are new to FS - welcome!
The site offers a six star scale for ranking work. Here's a guideline:
Six Stars (Exceptional: Simply Outstanding)
Five Stars (Excellent: Enjoyable and no revisions needed)
Four Stars (Good: Adjustments needed)
Three Stars (Below average)
Two Stars (Below Average: Needs lots of work)
One Star (Poor: Major revision required)
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
If I had a 6, it would be yours! This is a winner if ever there was one. It is a delightful story of a young child's experience getting to know Him. I used to go to Sunday School, and I loved listening to the stories they told us. At that age I had decided to become a Nun, but that idea soon went out the window with many other ideas I had. Good luck in the contest, I shall pop into my booth and make the vote when it opens. xsx Sandra.
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
|
If I had a 6, it would be yours! This is a winner if ever there was one. It is a delightful story of a young child's experience getting to know Him. I used to go to Sunday School, and I loved listening to the stories they told us. At that age I had decided to become a Nun, but that idea soon went out the window with many other ideas I had. Good luck in the contest, I shall pop into my booth and make the vote when it opens. xsx Sandra.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
-
thx Sandy!
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Yes I liked this insight through the yes of a seven year old child it is really very well written and a creative and original contest entry good luck regards Jill
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
|
Yes I liked this insight through the yes of a seven year old child it is really very well written and a creative and original contest entry good luck regards Jill
Comment Written 19-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2012
-
thx Jill!