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Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Self-preservation"A series of like minded poems
78 total reviews
Comment from rama devi
Wonderful to hear of your insight and inner energy, my friend. This portrays it with clarity and verve, though I'd also love to see a simile or metaphor to illustrate how you feel (for showing, not just telling).
I heard a live webcast of Amma this morning. She had a good metaphor for this: we are not candles that need to wait around for someone to light us, we have a self-effulgent sun within us...we need to bring it out to illuminate the dark paths of life.
Your poem captures this lesson well!
Please note one spag suggestion:
In the past 24 hours, I have regained and recovered,(no comma)
resilience, perseverance, and an undying commitment
Warmly,
rd
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2021
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Wonderful to hear of your insight and inner energy, my friend. This portrays it with clarity and verve, though I'd also love to see a simile or metaphor to illustrate how you feel (for showing, not just telling).
I heard a live webcast of Amma this morning. She had a good metaphor for this: we are not candles that need to wait around for someone to light us, we have a self-effulgent sun within us...we need to bring it out to illuminate the dark paths of life.
Your poem captures this lesson well!
Please note one spag suggestion:
In the past 24 hours, I have regained and recovered,(no comma)
resilience, perseverance, and an undying commitment
Warmly,
rd
Comment Written 06-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2021
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Hello Rama.
I hope you are doing well.
Thank you for this delightful review. I like your use of the term "verve" in describing my poem.
I take note of your suggestion to use a simile or metaphor to illustrate my points made. This sounds like a good idea, and one I will consider when rewriting this piece. I also appreciate your spotting a 'spag' and have made that correction. Many thanks.
Have a great Sunday, my friend.
Jesse
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THANKS dear Jesse, for your gracious response. Hope you have a terrific Sunday too!
Warmly, rd
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You're welcome, my friend.
Take care!
Jesse
Comment from Ric Myworld
These are some fine words and thoughts, Jesse. Hope is the answer. It can keep us going when our stamina has given up the fight. But, in truth, we can never try to make too much sense of anything in this old world, for it in itself will drive us crazy. Life is fickle, therefore we must hang-on through the tough times, so that we can be here for the good time. Thanks for sharing. I wish I had a six.
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2021
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These are some fine words and thoughts, Jesse. Hope is the answer. It can keep us going when our stamina has given up the fight. But, in truth, we can never try to make too much sense of anything in this old world, for it in itself will drive us crazy. Life is fickle, therefore we must hang-on through the tough times, so that we can be here for the good time. Thanks for sharing. I wish I had a six.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2021
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Thanks, Ric, for these thoughtful, sincere, and very kind comments. Life can be fickle, but I choose to be self-reliant for the sake of the times when it is hard to make sense of my life. I always turn to hope when I have nothing left but my own self-doubt. Your introspection is much appreciated, my friend.
Have a wonderful weekend.
Jesse
Comment from RGstar
Beautiful old friend, because I understand you more than most.
A lovely insight to a moment and a realisation that is to oneself.
Have a good week. Keep the focus. Life is short...much to break out to...
Have a great week.
My best.
RG
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2021
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Beautiful old friend, because I understand you more than most.
A lovely insight to a moment and a realisation that is to oneself.
Have a good week. Keep the focus. Life is short...much to break out to...
Have a great week.
My best.
RG
Comment Written 06-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2021
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It is good to hear from you, old friend. And it feels so fine to be understood. Thank you so much for the exceptional review and rating. I shall keep the focus and remember that life is very short.
Best wishes and have a wonderful weekend.
Jesse
Comment from Janice Canerdy
This concise piece is very moving, descriptive of a time of self-realization
and of wishing to come out of one's self and help others. I turn to the Lord; I know He can make me stronger.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2021
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This concise piece is very moving, descriptive of a time of self-realization
and of wishing to come out of one's self and help others. I turn to the Lord; I know He can make me stronger.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2021
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Thank you, Janice, for these kind words. Self-reliance is my credo but, I appreciate you sharing your faith with me. Have a beautiful weekend.
Take care,
Jesse
Comment from JudyE
I totally agree that, in the end, we can only rely on ourselves. And that's as it should be. We shouldn't put the burden for our happiness on to others.
I particularly like the last line: Never have I doubted that I would hold onto hope.
Stay safe
Judy
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2021
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I totally agree that, in the end, we can only rely on ourselves. And that's as it should be. We shouldn't put the burden for our happiness on to others.
I particularly like the last line: Never have I doubted that I would hold onto hope.
Stay safe
Judy
Comment Written 06-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2021
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Thanks, Judy. I appreciate that you are in accordance with my theme. I also agree that it is, as it should be. We mustn't put too much on others for our happiness. I am glad you chose your favorite line and it is mine, as well. Hope is eternal, as is inner peace.
Have a safe, and wonderful weekend.
Jesse
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Bravo for you! Your perseverance has carried you this far, so onward and upward. Your poem is a great inspiration to all who feel down and out or believe they can't. At the time personal struggles seem so difficult, but when you make it to the other side, you feel so accomplished. Helping others is a great way to add joy to their lives and at the same time make yourself realize you have much to share.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2021
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Bravo for you! Your perseverance has carried you this far, so onward and upward. Your poem is a great inspiration to all who feel down and out or believe they can't. At the time personal struggles seem so difficult, but when you make it to the other side, you feel so accomplished. Helping others is a great way to add joy to their lives and at the same time make yourself realize you have much to share.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 05-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2021
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Thank you, Jan, for your introspective perspective on my "personal struggles." Having much to share and give to others is always a good idea, I agree.
Take care,
Jesse
Comment from Irish Rain
Wow, I hope you're okay?
I like your poem...I gave my last
3 sixes away earlier, sorry.
I think we all feel this way, in that,
when our world is spinning apart, nothing
else really matters.
Your commitment to yourself is wonderful.
Without it, you've nothing to give others
anyway.
Never lose hope!!
Blessings...
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2021
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Wow, I hope you're okay?
I like your poem...I gave my last
3 sixes away earlier, sorry.
I think we all feel this way, in that,
when our world is spinning apart, nothing
else really matters.
Your commitment to yourself is wonderful.
Without it, you've nothing to give others
anyway.
Never lose hope!!
Blessings...
Comment Written 05-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2021
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I am recovering well from neck surgery, (yes, again!), and am claiming more independence from my caregivers, as each day moves forward. And, I shall never lose hope! Thanks for your blessings,
Jesse
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Neck surgery again! Wow!! Independence is so great...you are certainly moving forward...yay you!!!! Have a great weekend!!
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Can you believe it? It's true, I have the sore neck to show for it!
Thanks for the encouragement.
Enjoy your weekend, as well!
Jesse
Comment from Gloria ....
Excellent work, Jesse. I applaud your resilience and determination. Sometimes that's all the energy source a person has to keep on going.
Your artwork complement is inspired as it is a perfect match.
A most enjoyable read this evening.
Gloria
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2021
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Excellent work, Jesse. I applaud your resilience and determination. Sometimes that's all the energy source a person has to keep on going.
Your artwork complement is inspired as it is a perfect match.
A most enjoyable read this evening.
Gloria
Comment Written 05-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2021
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Thank you so much, Gloria. I value your opinion highly and feel joyous at the six-star rating. I am glad you found the artwork a perfect match for this poem. I thank you for your kindness and encouragement.
Take care and have a great weekend.
Jesse
Comment from Carlos' girl
I feel you. I really relate to this poem, its very honest and it mirrors some of my own thoughts. Very expressive and understandable. I appreciate ð??? this writing.
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2021
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I feel you. I really relate to this poem, its very honest and it mirrors some of my own thoughts. Very expressive and understandable. I appreciate ð??? this writing.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2021
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Thank you, Carlos' girl. I am glad this resonates with you. I am also happy it comes across as understandable and expressive.
Jesse
Comment from kahpot
Hello and welcome back, glad to read that you have not forgone hope, this is a wonderful read of positivity, as your artwork shows-no matter how deep we have to dig we will find hope, very well done****kahpot
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2021
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Hello and welcome back, glad to read that you have not forgone hope, this is a wonderful read of positivity, as your artwork shows-no matter how deep we have to dig we will find hope, very well done****kahpot
Comment Written 05-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2021
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Thank you so much for the welcome back into the folds of FS. I appreciate your very kind comments, with a nod to my positivity. I am happy you like the artwork choice. It feels good to be back.
Jesse