The Wind
Life on the prairie62 total reviews
Comment from anne1204
This story need some more, a better ending or "the rest of the story". You wrote with emotion and energy and great imagery, I felt I was left hanging. Anne
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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This story need some more, a better ending or "the rest of the story". You wrote with emotion and energy and great imagery, I felt I was left hanging. Anne
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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Hi Anne! Yes, someone else wanted this to continue. So since four said this, I will add to it asap. SO sorry. I never mean to do this. I really appreciate your honesty and time Anne!! ") Thanks again! Susan
Comment from missy98writer
Susan,
your flash fiction story is awesomely written and an enjoyable read. Your story paints a picture in the readers head. Excellent narrative and great descriptive writing. What a sad and depressing ending though. In a minimum amount of words for a maximum effect you've established a setting, conflict, and a resolution to your story. I just passed wind -LOL. Keep up the awesome writing.
Melissa.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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Susan,
your flash fiction story is awesomely written and an enjoyable read. Your story paints a picture in the readers head. Excellent narrative and great descriptive writing. What a sad and depressing ending though. In a minimum amount of words for a maximum effect you've established a setting, conflict, and a resolution to your story. I just passed wind -LOL. Keep up the awesome writing.
Melissa.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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Wow and wow! Thank you Melissa! I answered this, but it probably didn't go. I posted a story called "Travelers", if you can, would you let me know if it made it to you? I have put two treasure chests on it! Frustrating!! Thank you and I have some Beano if you want some? LOL! HUGS! Susan
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Oh, what a heart-breaking
story - I've read about the
Pioneer women and the hardships
they went through, often left
alone for months when their
husbands went off working..
and cut off from any neighbours
who were too far away to go to.
MArgaret
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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Oh, what a heart-breaking
story - I've read about the
Pioneer women and the hardships
they went through, often left
alone for months when their
husbands went off working..
and cut off from any neighbours
who were too far away to go to.
MArgaret
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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HI Margaret! Thank you so much! I was inspired by this picture...it's just so sparse looking. I can only imagine! I am always uncomfortable in wind...thanks again my friend! luv, susan
Comment from BarnCat
Hey Susan -- this was exceptional. You set the tone early on and created a morose tale fueled by an uncontrolable natural force that paralleled the woman's life. She could control her life -- her fate -- with no better results than controlling the wind itself. Excellent use of words to create mood as well as storyline. The passive voice works fairly well within this passive character (not necessarily by choice) creating a hopeless atmosphere. I curse the wind every day. And the cold. The snow gets old, and I yearn to be in a garden creating something.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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Hey Susan -- this was exceptional. You set the tone early on and created a morose tale fueled by an uncontrolable natural force that paralleled the woman's life. She could control her life -- her fate -- with no better results than controlling the wind itself. Excellent use of words to create mood as well as storyline. The passive voice works fairly well within this passive character (not necessarily by choice) creating a hopeless atmosphere. I curse the wind every day. And the cold. The snow gets old, and I yearn to be in a garden creating something.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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HI Deb! I am so sorry for being late with this reply...Seems time just gets away and I have to choose which to do, review, write or reply! ") Whew...I don't like wind at all. And you have it out there for sure! The hills here help disperse them a little. I really appreciate this great review...wow. ! Thank you again! How kind, and encouraging! Luv, susan
Comment from sherrygreywolf
I am familiar with those winds and they can make you crazy ... You've done a masterful job of sharing the woman's situation with us. I clearly felt her pain (as I said, I'm familiar with that wind - thank God for the radio!). Sad ending, but sometimes life is like that.
great job - sherry
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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I am familiar with those winds and they can make you crazy ... You've done a masterful job of sharing the woman's situation with us. I clearly felt her pain (as I said, I'm familiar with that wind - thank God for the radio!). Sad ending, but sometimes life is like that.
great job - sherry
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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Thank you Sherry! You must live out west! ") It's gorgeous, but some places are very barren. I sleep with a fan all the time, winter and summer! For the noise...it's soothing, even.? Thank you again, it's great to hear from you!! Susan
Comment from sunny39
Hi Susan - one of the things I do is study the picture a writer picks for his/her story. Sometimes I actually write the story after picking a picture.
This story is perfect for the picture. You show us a woman as alone as her log cabin. Her adversary is the wind. One of the things I really got from your story that the woman was is strong. You give us this clue in "came from hardy stock" - but even the strongest have at least one weakness - one thing that can really pull them down. In this woman's case, it was the wind. This was her downfall -
Yes, the ending was sad, but it really brought out the point of the weakness in the otherwise strong woman. I thought it was perfect.
A great short story.
Sunny
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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Hi Susan - one of the things I do is study the picture a writer picks for his/her story. Sometimes I actually write the story after picking a picture.
This story is perfect for the picture. You show us a woman as alone as her log cabin. Her adversary is the wind. One of the things I really got from your story that the woman was is strong. You give us this clue in "came from hardy stock" - but even the strongest have at least one weakness - one thing that can really pull them down. In this woman's case, it was the wind. This was her downfall -
Yes, the ending was sad, but it really brought out the point of the weakness in the otherwise strong woman. I thought it was perfect.
A great short story.
Sunny
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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HI Sunny! Thank you very much!! I would like to nominate this review if I had some votes...I really appreciate your details and time too! Super to hear from you!! I do this too, this picture inspired this story! ") Keep warm? We are back in the cold again here...so tired of it...") Luv, susan
Comment from Spiritual Echo
Writing at its best!
This has all the eerie qualities of despair and fear punctuated by un an unremorseful "wolf" or eneny at the door that will huff and puff and blow your house down.
The emotional collapse and the haunting incessant screech of the wind were powerfully presented.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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Writing at its best!
This has all the eerie qualities of despair and fear punctuated by un an unremorseful "wolf" or eneny at the door that will huff and puff and blow your house down.
The emotional collapse and the haunting incessant screech of the wind were powerfully presented.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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HI Ingrid! Why thanks! Another very encouraging review...I really appreciate you Ingrid...hope you are keeping warm...cold again here. Just getting so old! Luv, susan
Comment from c_lucas
One of the results of the dust bowl in the first half of the twentieth century was the wind driving people insane. This is very well written. Good job.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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One of the results of the dust bowl in the first half of the twentieth century was the wind driving people insane. This is very well written. Good job.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2011
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Thank you Charlie! I love the picture, and it brought this to mind! I appreciate your time and this review too C!! Have a wonderful Friday!! Susan
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You're welcome, Susan. Same to you. Charlie
Comment from humpwhistle
A pretty bleak picture you draw here. I have heard stories about the wind driving people crazy out on the plains. The isolation, the uncertainty, and finally the wind. Yup that might drive me over the edge.
Good work.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2011
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A pretty bleak picture you draw here. I have heard stories about the wind driving people crazy out on the plains. The isolation, the uncertainty, and finally the wind. Yup that might drive me over the edge.
Good work.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2011
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Hey there, Earlybird "). I'm sorry this is a downer. It was the picture, or maybe just me. I do appreciate you reading it anyway Lee...Hope your day goes well!! Susan
Comment from misscookie
What a lonely picture.
It is perfect for your story.
I couldn't believe how sad this story is I felt the pain of that's mother
Thanks for a cheery write so early in the morning it goes will with another load of snow this morning. ( smile)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2011
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What a lonely picture.
It is perfect for your story.
I couldn't believe how sad this story is I felt the pain of that's mother
Thanks for a cheery write so early in the morning it goes will with another load of snow this morning. ( smile)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2011
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Hi Cookie! Thank you so much! I'm sorry, you have snow? I hope it melts fast. And thanks for reading this anyway, knowing it is sad. I don't know what came over me. Something about the wind when it whistles. Creepy. Smile, it's not real. LOVE! Susan
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That' muse of yours is a wonderful mess. I enjoyed the read. Yes mother nature is playing with us.