Reviews from
Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "Homestead"
Musings of an old man -2021
51 total reviews
Comment from
Susan Newell
I really like the story in this free verse poem, and the way the story is told. It is very moving and reminds us all that we should remember from where and what we have come.
I do think you could make a few tweaks in punctuation and line breaks to improve it, as follow:
Since you leave the light on, should you first say "shines a light"? . . . "blinks"... "is" all that remains
side-ways s/b sideways
curtain's s/b curtains
gone-by s/b gone by
Would suggest new line beginning with "Raising" and ending with "call"
moons s/b moon's
shadow's s/b shadows
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Comment Written 28-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2021
Thank you Susan. The line break was a miss and thanks for the punctuation advice. Have a great day.
reply by Susan Newell on 28-Mar-2021
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