Her Lover is Lost to Her At Sea
A Ditty: Every Night She Keeps Watch for Her Captain54 total reviews
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
A great poem of heartbreak because her lover belongs to the sea. Clear meaning in your poem which is good for me because I have difficulty with metaphor. Good luck.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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A great poem of heartbreak because her lover belongs to the sea. Clear meaning in your poem which is good for me because I have difficulty with metaphor. Good luck.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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Hi Giddy: Thanks so much for the constellation bestowed... I'm honored and humbled. Yours, diana
Comment from Jesse James Doty
This is a lovely and romantic free verse poem. Well written and very descriptive of what she goes through waiting for him, and then realizing, he'll never return. My favorite line, by far, is the first one on the last stanza. I love the visual of her, "Nailing drapery over her reality". This is such an excellent line, and I love the metaphor of the drapery being nailed. Your Author's notes are to the point and help with the description of the poem. The flow and imagery are wonderful. Thank you for this treat.
Take care, Jesse
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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This is a lovely and romantic free verse poem. Well written and very descriptive of what she goes through waiting for him, and then realizing, he'll never return. My favorite line, by far, is the first one on the last stanza. I love the visual of her, "Nailing drapery over her reality". This is such an excellent line, and I love the metaphor of the drapery being nailed. Your Author's notes are to the point and help with the description of the poem. The flow and imagery are wonderful. Thank you for this treat.
Take care, Jesse
Comment Written 18-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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Hey Jesse: Always a pleasure... Thanks for that... it was my favorite visual too... kind of melancholy, Yours, diana
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Hi Diana
You have a wonderful way with words.
Jesse
Comment from Tootie
This is really good. Love the poem and the presentation with artwork is great. Flows really well and tells a sad story. Wishing you the best in the contest.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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This is really good. Love the poem and the presentation with artwork is great. Flows really well and tells a sad story. Wishing you the best in the contest.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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Hi Tootie:
Thanks so much for the constellation bestowed... I'm honored and humbled. Yours, diana
Comment from Air Spirit
A sad poem on loss -- and unrequited love specifically... I know the feeling of holding out hope to the very end -- when I have given every opportunity, chance, sliver of hope or a thread of promise and extended that to my beloved... to no avail... your mind plays tricks on you, and lies to you that there is hope, when there is none... if you were to look at it logically, your rational mind would say 'give it up' - but your heart and intuitive mind, says 'not yet.' It holds on until that lasts shred of hope has been eaten alive and you are left naked, bereft and broken... it is only then, once you admit the loss is permanent, than you can pick yourself up, and begin your new journey.. one step at a time... your poem was filled with poignant pain and lost hope.. I loved your sentence "...With every ounce of her being
Trying to see his smile but
the memory of his face is lost..." thank you for this painful, but beautiful rendering of the terrible tale of losing a loved one..
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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A sad poem on loss -- and unrequited love specifically... I know the feeling of holding out hope to the very end -- when I have given every opportunity, chance, sliver of hope or a thread of promise and extended that to my beloved... to no avail... your mind plays tricks on you, and lies to you that there is hope, when there is none... if you were to look at it logically, your rational mind would say 'give it up' - but your heart and intuitive mind, says 'not yet.' It holds on until that lasts shred of hope has been eaten alive and you are left naked, bereft and broken... it is only then, once you admit the loss is permanent, than you can pick yourself up, and begin your new journey.. one step at a time... your poem was filled with poignant pain and lost hope.. I loved your sentence "...With every ounce of her being
Trying to see his smile but
the memory of his face is lost..." thank you for this painful, but beautiful rendering of the terrible tale of losing a loved one..
Comment Written 18-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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Hi Air Spirit... I think most breathing humans know the feeling of hanging on too long and actually regret the time wasted on the bum(s)... It was a labor of love in a sense I just pulled from the time(s) I was this person and am now thankful that I will never do that again and I'm sick of Hollywood (happily ever after) endings. thanks so much yours, Diana
Comment from Dean Kuch
And thus, the Sirens of the Sea have gained another lost soul who's chosen the allure of frothy waves and adventure, creaking cargo holds and star-filled nights, to his true love that awaits him back home.
So sad but beautiful and well penned.
Best wishes to you in the contest, Anonymous Poet.
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2018
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And thus, the Sirens of the Sea have gained another lost soul who's chosen the allure of frothy waves and adventure, creaking cargo holds and star-filled nights, to his true love that awaits him back home.
So sad but beautiful and well penned.
Best wishes to you in the contest, Anonymous Poet.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2018
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Alas, his promise of undying/dying love (to this delicate maiden) was sealed with her first and last kiss. She walked away and as promised never looked back. Leaving her worldly goods behind and with only the clothes on her back; She was barefoot and without a map and still found the order of the Carmelite Nuns.
(Not edited... too lazy right now.)
Yes it was truly tragic... di
Comment from Lady Jane
Wow, so eloquently presented and penned here. What a nostalgic love story and the sad ending, appropriate for the style. You have penned a beautiful free verse here with the descending lines in italicizing adding to the overall flow of the penning. Good luck in the contest with this one. It is a true contender.
Janelle
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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Wow, so eloquently presented and penned here. What a nostalgic love story and the sad ending, appropriate for the style. You have penned a beautiful free verse here with the descending lines in italicizing adding to the overall flow of the penning. Good luck in the contest with this one. It is a true contender.
Janelle
Comment Written 18-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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Hi JaCheri: Thanks so much for the constellation bestowed... I'm honored and humbled. Yours, diana
Comment from friartuck
Very good free verse entry! Tells a familiar story in yet another form, with the same sad ending, still seeming fresh and new as we read it. Good luck ing ht e contestwith this!
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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Very good free verse entry! Tells a familiar story in yet another form, with the same sad ending, still seeming fresh and new as we read it. Good luck ing ht e contestwith this!
Comment Written 18-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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Hi Friartuck:
Thanks so much for the constellation bestowed... I'm honored and humbled. Yours, diana
Comment from Sara Elizabeth
This is a very well-written poem. You can sense the emotion through the words you use. Sad but with a sense of hope at the end that our subject will overcome. Well-penned. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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This is a very well-written poem. You can sense the emotion through the words you use. Sad but with a sense of hope at the end that our subject will overcome. Well-penned. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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Hi Sara Elizabeth:
Thanks so much for the constellation bestowed... I'm honored and humbled. Yours, diana
Comment from Shanbreen
A well written free verse poem. You have such wonderful lines to depict the long wait and finally to accept the loss.
"Nailing drapery over her reality" -- Exquisite.
Best for the contest.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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A well written free verse poem. You have such wonderful lines to depict the long wait and finally to accept the loss.
"Nailing drapery over her reality" -- Exquisite.
Best for the contest.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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Hello Shanbreen:
Thanks so much for the constellation bestowed... I'm honored and humbled. Yours, diana
Comment from jenintorre
This free verse tale is so sad and poignant. Well chosen artwork and excellent presentation. I wish you lots of luck with the voters. Best wishes. Jen.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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This free verse tale is so sad and poignant. Well chosen artwork and excellent presentation. I wish you lots of luck with the voters. Best wishes. Jen.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2018
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Hello Jenintorre:
Thanks so much for the constellation bestowed... I'm honored and humbled. Yours, diana