All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 29 "Bleached Beaches"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
74 total reviews
Comment from Joan E.
This is my second "lonely" poem in fifteen lines, and I have come to like the form. I admired your use of alliteration and echoing sounds to add intensity along with your vivid contrast between the beginning and ending scenes. Well done and best wishes in the contest. -Joan
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
This is my second "lonely" poem in fifteen lines, and I have come to like the form. I admired your use of alliteration and echoing sounds to add intensity along with your vivid contrast between the beginning and ending scenes. Well done and best wishes in the contest. -Joan
Comment Written 29-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
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thx so much Joan - who in this life has not been lonely at some time, hmm?
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Thanks again for vividly tapping into the feeling we have all had at some point. -Joan
Comment from Kingsland
This poem has the sounds of a situation that didn't work out very well. I liked the metaphor in describing the emotions in this poem. This was well written and a very enjoyable read... John
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
This poem has the sounds of a situation that didn't work out very well. I liked the metaphor in describing the emotions in this poem. This was well written and a very enjoyable read... John
Comment Written 29-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
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thx so much John!
Comment from Janice Canerdy
You have used powerful words in this poem about the disillusionment a bad break up leaves in its wake. Very effective contrast of before and after
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
You have used powerful words in this poem about the disillusionment a bad break up leaves in its wake. Very effective contrast of before and after
Comment Written 29-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
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thank you very much Janice!
Comment from Janet Foor
This was not only a lonely but also sad and heart breaking. Perfect picture to accompany this poem. Good presentation and great alliteration throughout. This was very well written.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
This was not only a lonely but also sad and heart breaking. Perfect picture to accompany this poem. Good presentation and great alliteration throughout. This was very well written.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
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thx Jmf!
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, mystery writer, you did an excellent job writing this free verse poem about walking the beaches alone now that love has gone away, good luck in the contest
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
this is very well written, mystery writer, you did an excellent job writing this free verse poem about walking the beaches alone now that love has gone away, good luck in the contest
Comment Written 29-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
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thx so much sweets!
Comment from mtnspirit
Hi,
Your poem and the art work well together and your poem is beautifully written. Fabulous descriptions describing how the partner feels after the other has gone away. Best wishes in this contest and thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
Hi,
Your poem and the art work well together and your poem is beautifully written. Fabulous descriptions describing how the partner feels after the other has gone away. Best wishes in this contest and thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
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thx so much ms!
Comment from wordsareus
I really enjoyed reading your poem. It is well written, and it makes the reader think. I only really got that it was about a failed marriage at the end.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
I really enjoyed reading your poem. It is well written, and it makes the reader think. I only really got that it was about a failed marriage at the end.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
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thx words!
Comment from adewpearl
great use of alliteration and assonance throughout - no wonder you asked us to read it aloud :-)
Vivid descriptive detail that makes for powerful contrast between the upbeat mood of the opening stanza and the bleak mood of the second stanza as love is lost and that ring is no longer there
Brooke
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
great use of alliteration and assonance throughout - no wonder you asked us to read it aloud :-)
Vivid descriptive detail that makes for powerful contrast between the upbeat mood of the opening stanza and the bleak mood of the second stanza as love is lost and that ring is no longer there
Brooke
Comment Written 29-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
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thx so much Brooke!
Comment from Deorre Leonard
What a great contest entry.. The picture compliments the poem it has a good flow. this is a well written poem the colors are perfect. Deorre
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
What a great contest entry.. The picture compliments the poem it has a good flow. this is a well written poem the colors are perfect. Deorre
Comment Written 29-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
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thank you so much Deorre!
Comment from mshirachot
Now that is a message of an aching loneliness. Great job with using the comparisons from good to bad in each stanza, Loved all the alliteration used also.
Best wishes with the contest entry!
Blessings to you,
Marsha
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
Now that is a message of an aching loneliness. Great job with using the comparisons from good to bad in each stanza, Loved all the alliteration used also.
Best wishes with the contest entry!
Blessings to you,
Marsha
Comment Written 29-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2012
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thank you so much, Marsha!