Short Stories
Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "Coming Home"A book of a mixture of stories
47 total reviews
Comment from hotstuff
What a well written story and how very sad it is. I too heard about the incident of the man left to die as people walked past him and was shocked. Your story may tug at the conscience of people who for whatever reason 'won't get involved' so why don't you try to get it published in your local daily paper? Society needs to be shaken awake.
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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What a well written story and how very sad it is. I too heard about the incident of the man left to die as people walked past him and was shocked. Your story may tug at the conscience of people who for whatever reason 'won't get involved' so why don't you try to get it published in your local daily paper? Society needs to be shaken awake.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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hotstuff,
I can't imagine what excuse they must try to feed themselves now that they know the man died...If they'd helped,he might have lived. What a chilling thought to face, but I have no pity for each heartless soul that passedhim by. Thank you for the kind review. Smiles, Carol
Comment from jadapenn
I also read this on the news. Dispicable how no one cares to get involved any more. Everyman for himself and to the devil with the rest. I truly enjoyed the emotion, suspense and tension you brought into your story, Smiles. Billy was always helping others, but no one bothered about him. You developed your character well.
Thanks for sharing this. Best wishes for the contest. luv jada
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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I also read this on the news. Dispicable how no one cares to get involved any more. Everyman for himself and to the devil with the rest. I truly enjoyed the emotion, suspense and tension you brought into your story, Smiles. Billy was always helping others, but no one bothered about him. You developed your character well.
Thanks for sharing this. Best wishes for the contest. luv jada
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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Jada,
You must have sent your ghosts to my neckof the woods...thisis the second one I wrote this week. Hope it's not a hidden message or anything. Thanks so much for the review and of course all the good yummy wishes...Smiles, Carol
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No sweetheart, "Hell found me" my ghost is here. I just gave him a new name. I'll have to whisper the name to you, but you smiles, already know it. lol. luv jada
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Oh no..I did my voodoo dance and spun around, chanting all night..that ghost of yours is gone....Smiles, Carol
Comment from dmjones
I saw that same new story and it made me sick at how people can just walk by and not help. Before I read your notes though this reminded me of another death that happened here. A man was out walking his dog when he came upon a man with a knife going after another man. The innocent man stepped into the middle trying to stop someone from getting hurt. The attacker turned on him and killed him similar to this.
This story produced the same emotions as when that happened. Really well written.
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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I saw that same new story and it made me sick at how people can just walk by and not help. Before I read your notes though this reminded me of another death that happened here. A man was out walking his dog when he came upon a man with a knife going after another man. The innocent man stepped into the middle trying to stop someone from getting hurt. The attacker turned on him and killed him similar to this.
This story produced the same emotions as when that happened. Really well written.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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Donna,
Can't imagine what must be gong through peoples minds to ignore someone in trouble..at least call for hlep if you don't want to get involved. Hope it never happens to them,,,Smiles, Carol
Comment from Shirley McLain
What a sad wonderful story. It has such emotion, I had to read it to the end and then I wanted it to go on. You did a very good job and I did not find any spag.
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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What a sad wonderful story. It has such emotion, I had to read it to the end and then I wanted it to go on. You did a very good job and I did not find any spag.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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Texasgal,
Thank you for the wonderful review. I hope it makes a few unbelievable peopdle stop and think next time...Thanks...Carol
Comment from Treasuregirl
You have written a great story here - it must surely stand a great chasnce in the contest. Your heart has to go out to this ex-soldier who apparently has gone through so much already and then can't settle back into civilian life with his family. He is a good man who helps others - rescuing the cat for the Chinese man and then going tothe aid of the woman being attacked. It comes as a bit of a shock when he meets up with his best friend and one realizes what has happened. A compelling read.
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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You have written a great story here - it must surely stand a great chasnce in the contest. Your heart has to go out to this ex-soldier who apparently has gone through so much already and then can't settle back into civilian life with his family. He is a good man who helps others - rescuing the cat for the Chinese man and then going tothe aid of the woman being attacked. It comes as a bit of a shock when he meets up with his best friend and one realizes what has happened. A compelling read.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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Treasuregirl,
Thank you so much for taking the time tor read and your generous comments. I appreciate it very much. Smiles, Carol
Comment from bohemiangeek
Your story did remind me of the news report that happened in NY. People can be sickening.
Your story gave a meaning to the good Samaritan that tried to help the woman and died. It reminds us life is valuable no matter what WE think is a properest life.
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reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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Your story did remind me of the news report that happened in NY. People can be sickening.
Your story gave a meaning to the good Samaritan that tried to help the woman and died. It reminds us life is valuable no matter what WE think is a properest life.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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bohemiangeek,
Thank you for stopping by and reading my story. I appreciate your comments and concern for the homeless. Carol
Comment from Judian James
I recognized the newscast right away. How horrendous was that. I wish there was some way to identify the various people that passed by him and somehow punish them. I keep hoping, they recognized themselves and are filled with remorse when they heard the story. I still don't understand why the lady who he helped didn't help him ...
Well done Carol and very well written. Nice ending
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reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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I recognized the newscast right away. How horrendous was that. I wish there was some way to identify the various people that passed by him and somehow punish them. I keep hoping, they recognized themselves and are filled with remorse when they heard the story. I still don't understand why the lady who he helped didn't help him ...
Well done Carol and very well written. Nice ending
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2010
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Jude,
Me either. It's crazy..She could at least have called for help...after all he saved her life. Like I said in my notes..I hope they can live with themselves and can find a good answer when they are at Heaven's doors. Thanks...Carol