Flash Fiction
Viewing comments for Chapter 41 "The Thunder Roared"Collection of Flash, Micro, etc.
59 total reviews
Comment from eliz100
This piece is well=written as usual. The transition from child to adult was very suttle. So that it was surprising that it ended with her as an adult.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
This piece is well=written as usual. The transition from child to adult was very suttle. So that it was surprising that it ended with her as an adult.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Eliz,
Thank you so much for the wonderful review. Glad you enjoyed the surprise ending too. Smiles, Carol
Comment from patmedium
Thankyou, Carol, for this cleverly written piece of work. Good luck with it. I could see, hear and feel it all, as is usual with your writing. Pat.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
Thankyou, Carol, for this cleverly written piece of work. Good luck with it. I could see, hear and feel it all, as is usual with your writing. Pat.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Pat,
You make me feel so good with your generous reviews. Thank you...Carol
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Well, your writing makes me feel glad to read it. Pat.
Comment from missy98writer
Carol,
Another great story and this is micro-fiction. I hate thunder storms too. The worst one was in 1999 when a tornado hit Oklahoma bad. I was in the thick of it, scary. Your do a fantastic job of describing an thunder storm. Great narrative. I was in the room with the child, but later on we learn she was recalling a time long ago. Great photo. I liked the ending when her husband rushed in an soothed her. Your story is an excellent entry in the micro-fiction contest. It tells a story about a woman's fear of thunder, a fear many of us have.
Melissa.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
Carol,
Another great story and this is micro-fiction. I hate thunder storms too. The worst one was in 1999 when a tornado hit Oklahoma bad. I was in the thick of it, scary. Your do a fantastic job of describing an thunder storm. Great narrative. I was in the room with the child, but later on we learn she was recalling a time long ago. Great photo. I liked the ending when her husband rushed in an soothed her. Your story is an excellent entry in the micro-fiction contest. It tells a story about a woman's fear of thunder, a fear many of us have.
Melissa.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Melissa,
I hate bad thunderstorms...Been in a hurricane and a tornado. Prefer to me in the sunshine, thank you...Smiles to you, Carol
Comment from Alison Williams
This is good Carol. Tight, tense, you can really feel for the little girl and the fear. It was a bit harsh of the mother to act like that. I would have let my kids crawl into bed with us if they were scared like that.
Oh wait, they already do when they have a nightmare. Heh. At least Luke does, but then he's four. Sammy, I have to speak to the dream faery again and scold her for letting a bad dream through.
She shut-off the light and pulled the door closed - Shut off sounds awkward, I would be more inclined to use turned off? or Switched off?
Otherwise, excellent tale. Good luck! Ali x
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
This is good Carol. Tight, tense, you can really feel for the little girl and the fear. It was a bit harsh of the mother to act like that. I would have let my kids crawl into bed with us if they were scared like that.
Oh wait, they already do when they have a nightmare. Heh. At least Luke does, but then he's four. Sammy, I have to speak to the dream faery again and scold her for letting a bad dream through.
She shut-off the light and pulled the door closed - Shut off sounds awkward, I would be more inclined to use turned off? or Switched off?
Otherwise, excellent tale. Good luck! Ali x
Comment Written 26-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Alison,
My children did too! My adult daughter still gets terrified when it storms. Thank you for the excellent review. Smiles, CArol
Comment from RebelRose
I used to be afraid of thunder storms too. I don't know of a person who wasn't frightened of them as a kid and most people still are, as adults. Good contest entry.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
I used to be afraid of thunder storms too. I don't know of a person who wasn't frightened of them as a kid and most people still are, as adults. Good contest entry.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Patty,
Except my ex-husband and my son...They love to stand on the porch and watch them..Not me..I hate the loud booms. Thanks for the kind review. Carol
Comment from ladybird
Damn! I still can't give you a six. This is good writing. You put the reader in that room with the child, then to find out it was a woman dreaming of a past disaster was a stroke of genius. That's it now,I'm not singing your praises anymore, lol. Not until the nex time at least, lol.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
Damn! I still can't give you a six. This is good writing. You put the reader in that room with the child, then to find out it was a woman dreaming of a past disaster was a stroke of genius. That's it now,I'm not singing your praises anymore, lol. Not until the nex time at least, lol.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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ladybird,
I'll just put a couple of IOU's in the box so you don't have to worry about it! LOL Thanks for telling me you enjoyed my writing so much. Smiles, CArol
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you're welcome.
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi Begin Again,
I used to enjoy watching the lightning as a child, although, living in the tropics it could be spectacular and close! But an experience with a tornado would definitely have changed that approach.
Good short fiction and well written!
Patrick
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
Hi Begin Again,
I used to enjoy watching the lightning as a child, although, living in the tropics it could be spectacular and close! But an experience with a tornado would definitely have changed that approach.
Good short fiction and well written!
Patrick
Comment Written 26-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Patrick,
Yes, Tornadoes and hurricanes can do more than just frighten you. Thanks for the wonderful comments. Tropics --- hmmm, sounds like a wonderful place to be. Smiles, Carol
Comment from lola29
Carol, I had to read this one twice to get the ending. At first, I thought it was the little girl's Dad, but then I see you transcended into the future--very clever.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
Carol, I had to read this one twice to get the ending. At first, I thought it was the little girl's Dad, but then I see you transcended into the future--very clever.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Lola,
I clarified it at the end by saying it was a dream. Thanks for the kind review. Carol
Comment from Realist101
I do not know where my sixes went so fast. I love this, Carol, just a beautiful story. Perfectly written, and so original. The picture is astounding as well!!! Susan
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
I do not know where my sixes went so fast. I love this, Carol, just a beautiful story. Perfectly written, and so original. The picture is astounding as well!!! Susan
Comment Written 26-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Susan,
I'll make a notation in the journal that I have one coming. LOL Glad that you enjoyed the story. Awesome comments. Smiles to you, Carol
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Glad to hear from you young lady, I will be gone a while, I thank you for all of your kindness and help here at FS!!! Be well. Luv, Susan
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Susan,
Are you okay? Your message scares me a bit...PM me! Always your friend, Carol
Comment from dragonqueen1983
i too sometimes was afriad of thunder as a child so i foulnd this story relatalbe. i wish you all the best in the contest
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
i too sometimes was afriad of thunder as a child so i foulnd this story relatalbe. i wish you all the best in the contest
Comment Written 26-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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dragonqueen,
Tornadoes and hurricanes can be terrifying and destructive. Glad you could relate. Thank you...Carol