Reviews from

Schmekel and Clekel McGee

A funny poem

82 total reviews 
Comment from GWHARGIS
Excellent
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This was a very funny poem. I enjoyed the adventure of this trio. It would be a very cute children's story. Find just the right illustrator and there you have it. The names were fun to say out loud. Great poem. Made an old lady giggle this morning. Gretchen

 Comment Written 24-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 26-Aug-2024
    LOL! Well, then I have succeeded Gretchen! That is just what it was supposed to do - make you laugh. I really appreciate your review!
Comment from Heather Knight
Excellent
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I love the rhyming scheme you have used for this poem, it flows easily which matches the subject very well.
And as you said yourself, it is a lot of un to read.
Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 24-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 26-Aug-2024
    Well, thank you Heather. It is about the fun! I really appreciate your review!
Comment from Father Flaps
Excellent
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Hi Harry,
We need more comedy in Fanstory. Thanks for sharing.
These three are quite a team, and their names rhyme... "Schmekel, Clekel and Freckle". You did a good job with rhymes all the way through. A fun write!
Cheers,
Kimbob

 Comment Written 23-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 26-Aug-2024
    LOL! Well, thank you Kimbob. I really appreciate that!
Comment from QC Poet
Excellent
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Nicely composed poem with a bit of a off beat rhythmic pattern thank you for sharing your poetic work with us on the adventures of these three characters

 Comment Written 23-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 23-Aug-2024
    Well, thank you QC Poet. I really appreciate your review!
Comment from Gunner Lil
Needs Improvement
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Not great but getting there. An easy read that was nice for the reader. Good rhyming that caused a good flow and pace that moved it along. Thanks for sharing.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
    Thanks.
Comment from Shirley Ann Bunyan
Excellent
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OK Harry, I admit I clicked on this because it was on 'poems for review', but I'm glad I did. I, for one, think there should be a lot more light-hearted humour in poetry and I found Schmeckel, Clekel and Frekel delightful characters. The more nonsense the better, I say! Well done :)

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
    LOL! Well, thank you Shirley. I really appreciate that!
reply by Shirley Ann Bunyan on 22-Aug-2024
    You're welcome :)
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
Comment from Jim Wile
Excellent
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This was a very amusing and clever poem, Harry. Each character had his own quirks, and I loved the funny names.

The rhyming was pretty good, but to make a really quality poem, it would benefit from good meter. I'm somewhat old school when it comes to poetry. To me, the meter is extremely important in making a quality rhyming poem. Perhaps not so much for a free verse poem, but even then good meter is a benefit.

You mentioned in your review of my poem "Ole Blue" that you wished you could write like that. I think the thing that probably attracted you to it was the meter in conjunction with the rhyme.

Here's the thing. I could teach you how to write with good poetic meter if you are interested in learning. I have taught a number of others on FanStory how to do it. In fact, I once posted an essay (but on the poetry side vs the prose side so that more poets might read it) called "My Thoughts on Meter in Poetry."

It is too cumbersome to teach this through these textboxes on FanStory, and I do it through email. I will give a thorough critique of the poem and show how the meter can be improved on a few stanzas and encourage the poet to try out the approach on the rest. I'll send you a Word version of the essay, which has many of the points I make in it.

If you are interested in this, you can email me at jwile123@gmail.com and I would be happy to begin a correspondence with you. I do it just because I find it enjoyable to do, and there's no charge. - Jim

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
    Well, thank you Jim. I really appreciate that. I would like that. My email is: ericrgrs432@gmail.com!
Comment from CrystieCookie999
Excellent
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The audience for this poem could be as young as first or second graders, with funny name rhymes. The dog, of course, is a real-life sounding dog, who has a thing for cotton candy. Fun read.

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
    LOL! Well, thank you for your kind words and your review CrystieCookie999. I really appreciate that!
Comment from Sarah Sandison
Excellent
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Love this and laughed all the way through! It reminded me of a book I used to read to my daughter years ago called Hairy MacLary from Donaldsons dairy! Your sense of humour comes through your poetry :)

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
    LOL! Well, thank you Sarah for the kind words and the review. I really appreciate that!
Comment from Monica Chaddick
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This was so cute and sing - songey (not certain whether that is a word or not - lol). I think kids would really relate to this rhyme, and definitely these characters. You could branch out into stories with them, as well. Great job!

 Comment Written 21-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 21-Aug-2024
    Thank you again for your review!