Titillating
Seeing her for the very first time41 total reviews
Comment from LisaMay
I think you've done a marvellous job with this poem, capturing the grace and beauty of this 'Goddess' and her effect on you.
But you are going to have to prune 2 lines off the poem as the contest requirement is for a 7-line poem and you have 9 lines.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
I think you've done a marvellous job with this poem, capturing the grace and beauty of this 'Goddess' and her effect on you.
But you are going to have to prune 2 lines off the poem as the contest requirement is for a 7-line poem and you have 9 lines.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
-
LisaMay, I miss read thank you for the heads-up. Easy fix fortunately
-
Saved in time. Good luck.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written Pleiades poem it seems you meet all the requirements except for the fact that your poem has nine lines instead of seven as stipulated in the rules.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
A very well-written Pleiades poem it seems you meet all the requirements except for the fact that your poem has nine lines instead of seven as stipulated in the rules.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
-
Hi Sandra, I have corrected this down to seven and I dint think I interfered with the flow.. I appreciate the heads-up I just got caught up in the moment...
Comment from June Sargent
A great entry for the contest! Totally titillating and tantalizing- flowed nicely without feeling contrived. I wish you the best - should do well. Nice artwork, too.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
A great entry for the contest! Totally titillating and tantalizing- flowed nicely without feeling contrived. I wish you the best - should do well. Nice artwork, too.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
-
June, thabks!
Comment from evesayshi
In my opinion, this lovely poem not only complies perfectly with the prompt, its adherence is smoothly articulate and beautifully rendered, both in compliant verse and artful image,. I thoroughly enjoyed my read, not at all strictly aware of the prompt's dictate. It was presented both smoothly and artistically, an "Exceptional" write indeed...
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
In my opinion, this lovely poem not only complies perfectly with the prompt, its adherence is smoothly articulate and beautifully rendered, both in compliant verse and artful image,. I thoroughly enjoyed my read, not at all strictly aware of the prompt's dictate. It was presented both smoothly and artistically, an "Exceptional" write indeed...
Comment Written 28-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
-
Eve, I am humbled by your review and and comments in every way thank you!
-
You are very welcome - thank you for such a thoroughly enjoyable read...Eve
Comment from Jeffrey L. Michaux
I know that seeing a striking woman causes us to feel like we've been translated to other realms. We visualize all of the possibilities before we touch down on earth again to ask her to dance. I like what you've done with this and enjoyed reading this well written work. Well done l
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
I know that seeing a striking woman causes us to feel like we've been translated to other realms. We visualize all of the possibilities before we touch down on earth again to ask her to dance. I like what you've done with this and enjoyed reading this well written work. Well done l
Comment Written 28-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
-
Thank you Jerffrey!
Comment from CrystieCookie999
Looks like you are doing a great job adhering to that Pleiades poem format. I see T at the beginning of every line and some T alliteration with such phrases as "tender thoughts," "Tingling...transcend..." Dancing can certainly be titillating!
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
Looks like you are doing a great job adhering to that Pleiades poem format. I see T at the beginning of every line and some T alliteration with such phrases as "tender thoughts," "Tingling...transcend..." Dancing can certainly be titillating!
Comment Written 28-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
-
Thank you, I enjoyed the development of this poem.
Comment from Janice Canerdy
Your Pleiades poem is vividly descriptive, romantic, creatively composed,
and delightful. I love your approach--describing her as a majestic, mesmerizing goddess, then asking her to dance.
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
Your Pleiades poem is vividly descriptive, romantic, creatively composed,
and delightful. I love your approach--describing her as a majestic, mesmerizing goddess, then asking her to dance.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
-
Janice, thank you never shy one to to shy away from a dance number. LOL
Comment from Jesse James Doty
You certainly seem intrigued by her dancing. You describe your desire for her in so many ways. I must say I noticed something in the first line. "To see her dance in the moonlight, she so captivating." I suggest it might be better to say that "she's" so captivating. Or "she is" so captivating. I like the artwork you chose for this piece. I appreciate that this must be difficult to write using the Pleiades style of poetry. You accomplished what you set out to do, and it is interesting to read. Thank you for sharing.
Take care, Jesse
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
You certainly seem intrigued by her dancing. You describe your desire for her in so many ways. I must say I noticed something in the first line. "To see her dance in the moonlight, she so captivating." I suggest it might be better to say that "she's" so captivating. Or "she is" so captivating. I like the artwork you chose for this piece. I appreciate that this must be difficult to write using the Pleiades style of poetry. You accomplished what you set out to do, and it is interesting to read. Thank you for sharing.
Take care, Jesse
Comment Written 28-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
-
Jesse, thank you never transmutes properly in writing the words, but the meaning is real Your suggestion so of course quite correct....
-
I'm glad I could help. You're sincerely welcome. Have a nice weekend.
Jesse
Comment from Sharon Haiste
I think this is a good entry for the Pleiades Poetry writing prompt.
Your verse definitely describes a Titallating woman very nicely.
Well done and I with you luck with the contest.
Sharon
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
I think this is a good entry for the Pleiades Poetry writing prompt.
Your verse definitely describes a Titallating woman very nicely.
Well done and I with you luck with the contest.
Sharon
Comment Written 28-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
-
My sincere thanks Sharon..
Comment from Therese Caron
This is a lovely poem, and I am sure was a lot of work. Your words are graceful and delicate, yet show strong emotion. The only thing I see is that you spelled titillating wrong in the title. I think it is a typo because you have it spelled correctly in the poem. An easy fix. This is beautiful work, and I wish you well in the contest!
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
This is a lovely poem, and I am sure was a lot of work. Your words are graceful and delicate, yet show strong emotion. The only thing I see is that you spelled titillating wrong in the title. I think it is a typo because you have it spelled correctly in the poem. An easy fix. This is beautiful work, and I wish you well in the contest!
Comment Written 28-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 28-Dec-2019
-
Oh gee whiz....I thank you....I have an eye exam coming up in January probably none to soon. LOL
-
I just hate seeing someone get disqualified or lose because of a simple error. Good luck!