Tilting at Windmills
When faith runs out48 total reviews
Comment from Cindy McIntyre
I remember reading Don Quixote and I noticed you wrote that its resemblance was incidental. Faith is such a tricky journey. I love the idea of your descriptive "battle" words. Thank you for sharing your poem.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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I remember reading Don Quixote and I noticed you wrote that its resemblance was incidental. Faith is such a tricky journey. I love the idea of your descriptive "battle" words. Thank you for sharing your poem.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Many thanks, Cindy, for your comments. Appreciated. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from Just2Write
Faith is indeed shakeable - even in the most unshakeable people. When the wind of fear is howling just outside your window - you get a whole new perspective on what faith, or lack of it can mean.
You have a knack for using obscure words and making them feel comfortable.
Battledore, shuttlecock, wind-shanked. I particularly liked stanza 2
But encased in faith's dull armour,
blood-crusted in pursuit of right,
this old crusader, resurrected,
stands ready, resolute to fight.
Perfect for how the person whose faith and the battle for their very soul is being tested.
I also liked your conclusion:
Since his armour's rather rusted,
ancient rites no longer trusted,
he is tempted by the devil
to genuflect, and then skedaddle.
Another beautiful word - skedaddle - a touch of whimsy on a rather 'grave' topic.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Faith is indeed shakeable - even in the most unshakeable people. When the wind of fear is howling just outside your window - you get a whole new perspective on what faith, or lack of it can mean.
You have a knack for using obscure words and making them feel comfortable.
Battledore, shuttlecock, wind-shanked. I particularly liked stanza 2
But encased in faith's dull armour,
blood-crusted in pursuit of right,
this old crusader, resurrected,
stands ready, resolute to fight.
Perfect for how the person whose faith and the battle for their very soul is being tested.
I also liked your conclusion:
Since his armour's rather rusted,
ancient rites no longer trusted,
he is tempted by the devil
to genuflect, and then skedaddle.
Another beautiful word - skedaddle - a touch of whimsy on a rather 'grave' topic.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Many thanks, Joy, for your detailed comments both about the construction and the intent of my poem. Appreciated. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from Sharon Haiste
I think this is a good entry for the Faith Poetry writing prompt.
Your story of the crack in your faith is clear and well written within your verse.
Well done and good luck to you with the competition.
Sharon
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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I think this is a good entry for the Faith Poetry writing prompt.
Your story of the crack in your faith is clear and well written within your verse.
Well done and good luck to you with the competition.
Sharon
Comment Written 24-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Many thanks, Sharon, for your comments about the intent of my poem, and for your good luck wishes. Appreciated. All the best, Tony.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
That is one scary scarecrow. Maybe something from outer space? Time-tested and weakened the poet tells us he finds he still has faith. Great alliteration and strange new words that make us reach for the dictionary. Well done Tony. Nancy
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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That is one scary scarecrow. Maybe something from outer space? Time-tested and weakened the poet tells us he finds he still has faith. Great alliteration and strange new words that make us reach for the dictionary. Well done Tony. Nancy
Comment Written 24-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Many thanks, Nancy, for your comments both about the construction and the intent of my poem. Appreciated. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from His Grayness
I really enjoyed this very creative and enlightening work! The opening artwork was a great gripper and the dialog was delivered perfectly with excellent rhyme and pace throughout, so I thank this author for an outstanding and delightful read! HIS GRAYNESS;Vance
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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I really enjoyed this very creative and enlightening work! The opening artwork was a great gripper and the dialog was delivered perfectly with excellent rhyme and pace throughout, so I thank this author for an outstanding and delightful read! HIS GRAYNESS;Vance
Comment Written 24-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Many thanks, Vance, for your comments both about the construction and the intent of my poem. Appreciated. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Artasylum
Thanks for forcing me to look up so many words... this was an english class... I love when I have to look up half a poem. Great Read. Can't wait to look up more words with your post. yours, diana
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Thanks for forcing me to look up so many words... this was an english class... I love when I have to look up half a poem. Great Read. Can't wait to look up more words with your post. yours, diana
Comment Written 24-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Many thanks, Diana, for your comments about my poem. Appreciated. I hope it wasn't too obscure! Best wishes, Tony
Comment from MelB
Hi Tony, fantastic description, imagery and alliteration in this poem of faith. Wonderful artwork to compliment as well. The armor may be a little worn, but he is still in the battle!
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Hi Tony, fantastic description, imagery and alliteration in this poem of faith. Wonderful artwork to compliment as well. The armor may be a little worn, but he is still in the battle!
Comment Written 24-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Many thanks, Mel, for your comments both about the construction and the intent of my poem. Appreciated. Best wishes, Tony
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You're most welcome:)
Comment from Mrs. KT
Hello Tony,
How many times have the rituals of an established religion tested and/or broken one's faith?
Since his armour's rather rusted,
ancient rites no longer trusted,
he is tempted by the devil
to genuflect, and then skedaddle.
How often does one's religious practices turn a blind eye to what is happening outside the hallowed pews of rites and genuflection?
You pose timely and important thoughts/messages in this well-crafted verse that is filled with excellent alliteration, rhyme and cadence.
Much appreciated!
diane
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Hello Tony,
How many times have the rituals of an established religion tested and/or broken one's faith?
Since his armour's rather rusted,
ancient rites no longer trusted,
he is tempted by the devil
to genuflect, and then skedaddle.
How often does one's religious practices turn a blind eye to what is happening outside the hallowed pews of rites and genuflection?
You pose timely and important thoughts/messages in this well-crafted verse that is filled with excellent alliteration, rhyme and cadence.
Much appreciated!
diane
Comment Written 24-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Many thanks, Diane, for your comments both about the construction and the intent of my poem. Appreciated. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from catch22
Hi Tony, I was very impressed by this excellent reflection on faith that is tested and weakened through time and experience. It is commendable that the narrator in the poem can still believe in a benevolent deity even after battling demons like addiction and death. I thought the rhythm in the poem was great and I loved the use of trochaic metrical substitution in some of the mostly iambic stanzas. I was not sure of the form. Is this a double rispetto? It looks like it. Excellent write and best in the contest.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Hi Tony, I was very impressed by this excellent reflection on faith that is tested and weakened through time and experience. It is commendable that the narrator in the poem can still believe in a benevolent deity even after battling demons like addiction and death. I thought the rhythm in the poem was great and I loved the use of trochaic metrical substitution in some of the mostly iambic stanzas. I was not sure of the form. Is this a double rispetto? It looks like it. Excellent write and best in the contest.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Many thanks, Pam, for your comments both about the construction and the intent of my poem. Appreciated. Not intentionally any set form, bu you are right, there is an echo of the rispetto in it, with the switch between aabb and abcb rhyming. It actually started off as a free verse poem and is about as close to a dreamscape as I'm likely to come. I hope that you and Jeff are travelling successfully down that path. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Boogienights
This is great, I loved it. That it reminded me of Don Quixote was a plus as I love that musical. Your descriptive words and image create an exciting poem to read. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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This is great, I loved it. That it reminded me of Don Quixote was a plus as I love that musical. Your descriptive words and image create an exciting poem to read. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2018
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2018
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Many thanks, Boogienights, for your comments about my poem. Appreciated. Best wishes, Tony
