The Tiny Leaf
Perserverence41 total reviews
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
His little stem stayed fastened tight. Look at the first letter in this line up above.
Cute poem, personifying a lowly leaf. I know what you mean about everything seeming sentient, even though we know better. It's more fun that way! :)
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
  |
His little stem stayed fastened tight. Look at the first letter in this line up above.
Cute poem, personifying a lowly leaf. I know what you mean about everything seeming sentient, even though we know better. It's more fun that way! :)
Comment Written 05-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
-
I'll straight out the 'h.' T hanks for pointing that out.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I feel awful not having a 6 for this enchanting poem, Yvonne, I owe you one big time! A simple poem, you call it, but how charming it is. I can see that little leaf trying to break free and when he does the cheering from all the other leaves can be heard for miles around. It was a wonderful poem, my friend, and one that little children would be enthralled with. I can only give you a virtual 6, I hope others have some left. Big hugs, my friend. Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
|
I feel awful not having a 6 for this enchanting poem, Yvonne, I owe you one big time! A simple poem, you call it, but how charming it is. I can see that little leaf trying to break free and when he does the cheering from all the other leaves can be heard for miles around. It was a wonderful poem, my friend, and one that little children would be enthralled with. I can only give you a virtual 6, I hope others have some left. Big hugs, my friend. Sandra xxx
Comment Written 05-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
-
Thank you. I treasure a virtual six from you.
Comment from Thomas Bowling
I like the determination of the tiny leaf. He was like the little train who could. I bought my dwarf lime tree inside to protect it from the cold. I knew it wasn't doing well when I could count the leaves as I walked by.
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
|
I like the determination of the tiny leaf. He was like the little train who could. I bought my dwarf lime tree inside to protect it from the cold. I knew it wasn't doing well when I could count the leaves as I walked by.
Comment Written 05-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
-
Good that you brought it in. Thanks for reviewing.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Yvonne,
You did a great job with this story of the tiny leaf. Your rhymes are super as is the meter. You are awesome writing about nature. Your well chosen words create great imagery. It is easy to see this little leaf stranded on the tree while his friends are on the ground. Also, we have to remember that all the leaves fall from deciduous trees so the tree can survive the winter. Then spring brings new life. The little leaf may be gone from the tree, but he is part of the cycle of life. Great job. Thanks for sharing. Jan
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
 |
Yvonne,
You did a great job with this story of the tiny leaf. Your rhymes are super as is the meter. You are awesome writing about nature. Your well chosen words create great imagery. It is easy to see this little leaf stranded on the tree while his friends are on the ground. Also, we have to remember that all the leaves fall from deciduous trees so the tree can survive the winter. Then spring brings new life. The little leaf may be gone from the tree, but he is part of the cycle of life. Great job. Thanks for sharing. Jan
Comment Written 05-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
-
Thank you for this awesome review. My head gets bigger by the minute. lol
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
The tiny leaf fell to the earth and joined his pals in play.
You may have heard the celebrations going on that day.
The news spread through the woodland, over every hill and dale,
and every Spring, each new-born bud's encouraged by this tale.
A beautiful poem well done you so many inspirational images in this much enjoyed love and regards Meia x
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
|
The tiny leaf fell to the earth and joined his pals in play.
You may have heard the celebrations going on that day.
The news spread through the woodland, over every hill and dale,
and every Spring, each new-born bud's encouraged by this tale.
A beautiful poem well done you so many inspirational images in this much enjoyed love and regards Meia x
Comment Written 05-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
-
Thank you. I'm glad you thought so.
Comment from Sharon Haiste
This is a cute 'simple poem, just for fun', well done and well written and rhymed.
Thank you for sharing this fun piece with us.
Sharon
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
|
This is a cute 'simple poem, just for fun', well done and well written and rhymed.
Thank you for sharing this fun piece with us.
Sharon
Comment Written 05-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
-
Thank you for reviewing. I'm glad you liked it.
Comment from Cedar
This is a very well written poem. Your presentation picture matches your words perfectly. Also, your rhyming and rhythm make your poem so easy and smooth to read.
I enjoyed reading your tale about the "tiny leaf." Have a great weekend...Bill
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
|
This is a very well written poem. Your presentation picture matches your words perfectly. Also, your rhyming and rhythm make your poem so easy and smooth to read.
I enjoyed reading your tale about the "tiny leaf." Have a great weekend...Bill
Comment Written 05-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
-
Thank you for a wonderful review.
Comment from mermaids
I like how the little leaf is a character in your poem and how he joins the others and ends up a new bud. There is a feeling of renewal in your words that captures a good feeling.
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
|
I like how the little leaf is a character in your poem and how he joins the others and ends up a new bud. There is a feeling of renewal in your words that captures a good feeling.
Comment Written 05-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
-
Thank you. I'm glad you got that.
Comment from kiwisteveh
Hi, Yvonne. We have had a big summer storm over the last two days so there are leaves and debris everywhere. Still plenty on the trees, though, despite the gale force winds, so they must cling on pretty tight at this time of year!
What a lovely tale you tell of the last leaf, determined to join his mates on the ground. It has whimsy yet also pathos as he feels so left behind - the happy ending sets the story off well.
A great strength in your poem is the very natural and easy-flowing narration. The iambic heptameter is very smooth and regular, which suits this kind of rhyming tale.
I did get caught out by how you had broken up the sentences at the end of stanza 2/start of stanza 3. I think I would have been tempted to punctuate it like this...
He hung there for two days and nights, each colder than the last,
though shivering and shaking hard all through the arctic blast.
His little stem stayed fastened tight, no freedom was in sight.
He thought now he would surely die suspended one more night.
It makes perfect sense either way, but this version prevents the sentence running across the stanza break.
Lovely piece.
Steve
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
|
Hi, Yvonne. We have had a big summer storm over the last two days so there are leaves and debris everywhere. Still plenty on the trees, though, despite the gale force winds, so they must cling on pretty tight at this time of year!
What a lovely tale you tell of the last leaf, determined to join his mates on the ground. It has whimsy yet also pathos as he feels so left behind - the happy ending sets the story off well.
A great strength in your poem is the very natural and easy-flowing narration. The iambic heptameter is very smooth and regular, which suits this kind of rhyming tale.
I did get caught out by how you had broken up the sentences at the end of stanza 2/start of stanza 3. I think I would have been tempted to punctuate it like this...
He hung there for two days and nights, each colder than the last,
though shivering and shaking hard all through the arctic blast.
His little stem stayed fastened tight, no freedom was in sight.
He thought now he would surely die suspended one more night.
It makes perfect sense either way, but this version prevents the sentence running across the stanza break.
Lovely piece.
Steve
Comment Written 05-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
-
You're so right. It is better. I will change that. Thank you for such an honest review, and for being so supportive.
-
My pleasure. It's a very sweet piece.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well- written poem about that little persistent leave clinging on the tree until the bitter end while all his friends are already lying on the ground. He becomes a legend to all the new buds forming in Spring.
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
|
A very well- written poem about that little persistent leave clinging on the tree until the bitter end while all his friends are already lying on the ground. He becomes a legend to all the new buds forming in Spring.
Comment Written 05-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2018
-
Thank you for reviewing.