Luna's Form Poetry
Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "Man in the Moon"a place to gather my poetic forms
42 total reviews
Comment from Drew Delaney
Really a well written Rondeau. I have not tried this form, but I have written some Rondeau Redoubles. It's a joy when one can turn out to make good sense. I enjoyed reading this one. Hav. Good week. Drew
Really a well written Rondeau. I have not tried this form, but I have written some Rondeau Redoubles. It's a joy when one can turn out to make good sense. I enjoyed reading this one. Hav. Good week. Drew
Comment Written 09-Jan-2017
Comment from estory
nice rocking, lullaby rhythm in this poem. the rhymes worked to rock you from stanza to stanza. nice images. The queen a wolverine is an interesting one. gives this poem some bite. estory
nice rocking, lullaby rhythm in this poem. the rhymes worked to rock you from stanza to stanza. nice images. The queen a wolverine is an interesting one. gives this poem some bite. estory
Comment Written 09-Jan-2017
Comment from Javed05
touching piece. I like this poem and the way story unfolds.it is engaging for the reader.it flows well.language used is great and simple which creates good imagery. thanks for sharing with us.
touching piece. I like this poem and the way story unfolds.it is engaging for the reader.it flows well.language used is great and simple which creates good imagery. thanks for sharing with us.
Comment Written 09-Jan-2017
Comment from vkmack
This is a lovely and genuine monologue. Love your choice of rhymes here (been, seen, serene, sateen, queen, wolverine, evergreens, preen). Your use of the s sound is soothing and gives a lullaby feel to the rondeau throughout. Terrific use of language, sound (I did read it aloud), meter, and form. Wonderful job.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2017
This is a lovely and genuine monologue. Love your choice of rhymes here (been, seen, serene, sateen, queen, wolverine, evergreens, preen). Your use of the s sound is soothing and gives a lullaby feel to the rondeau throughout. Terrific use of language, sound (I did read it aloud), meter, and form. Wonderful job.
Comment Written 09-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2017
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Dear vkmack,
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for this superb six-star rating! I'm happy that you enjoyed the poem so much that you felt it worthy. I appreciate your flattering review, and thank you once again for the six-stars!
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You are so welcome!
Comment from robyn corum
Luna,
This was a haunting poem but not my favorite of yours. The first stanza entranced me -- set me up beautifully for a delightful poem about the moon.
The shift in the second stanza surprised me. It was unexpected and I didn't understand the queen/wolverine on sheets reference at all!
The final stanza was okay but you had shifted again to the fairies who dance in the moon's light. I suppose there's only so much you can say about the moon but I was still disappointed. Sorry.
I almost offered a four star rating but I REALLY like that first stanza. *smile* lovely!
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2017
Luna,
This was a haunting poem but not my favorite of yours. The first stanza entranced me -- set me up beautifully for a delightful poem about the moon.
The shift in the second stanza surprised me. It was unexpected and I didn't understand the queen/wolverine on sheets reference at all!
The final stanza was okay but you had shifted again to the fairies who dance in the moon's light. I suppose there's only so much you can say about the moon but I was still disappointed. Sorry.
I almost offered a four star rating but I REALLY like that first stanza. *smile* lovely!
Comment Written 09-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2017
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Thanks very much for your review, my friend robyn.
I guess we can't win 'em all, can we?
Thanks for your honest opinion.
The Queen / wolverine, sheets reference, by the way, was not meant to make sense, as many of our dreams don't. What I guess I left unsaid was that the man in the moon was overseeing it, actually overseeing the whole poem.
But once again, I truly admire your honesty, and im happy that you enjoyed the first stanza!
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Thank you for your willingness to hear others' honest opinions and to hear them instead of reacting negatively. I appreciate that!
Comment from papa55mike
I love this poem, it's an interesting style that I haven't seen before. I think you have a type-o in the title. Please check it.
Have a great day and God bless.
mike
I love this poem, it's an interesting style that I haven't seen before. I think you have a type-o in the title. Please check it.
Have a great day and God bless.
mike
Comment Written 09-Jan-2017
Comment from crybry67
Lovely job on your rondeau! I do want to mention the extra letter ( an a) in the title. Wonderful presentation to complement your words! Blessings... Christy
Lovely job on your rondeau! I do want to mention the extra letter ( an a) in the title. Wonderful presentation to complement your words! Blessings... Christy
Comment Written 09-Jan-2017
Comment from Janet Foor
A lovely rondeau poem Luna. Very creative and very nice rondeau rhyme. A perfect topic for someone called Luna. :)
Very nicely done
Blessings
Janet
A lovely rondeau poem Luna. Very creative and very nice rondeau rhyme. A perfect topic for someone called Luna. :)
Very nicely done
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 09-Jan-2017
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
An absolutely amazing poem...poems written about the moon always come off so strongly to me...there's so much emotion in this. I love it. I know exactly how you feel, it is expressed so beautifully here, it is like gazing at the moon itself.
it's hard to pick out one line from this poem to congratulate you on...mainly because the entire thing was filled with only great lines.This was an 'all killer, no filler' type of work :). very nice. great job.Meia :)
An absolutely amazing poem...poems written about the moon always come off so strongly to me...there's so much emotion in this. I love it. I know exactly how you feel, it is expressed so beautifully here, it is like gazing at the moon itself.
it's hard to pick out one line from this poem to congratulate you on...mainly because the entire thing was filled with only great lines.This was an 'all killer, no filler' type of work :). very nice. great job.Meia :)
Comment Written 09-Jan-2017
Comment from DR DIP
Fix your title, you have written it as MAN IN ATHE MOON ah that's better lol
The man in the moon has been the subject of many writes even some songs such as REM'S man in the moon.
this is a very good Rondeau. Thanks for sharing
dip
Fix your title, you have written it as MAN IN ATHE MOON ah that's better lol
The man in the moon has been the subject of many writes even some songs such as REM'S man in the moon.
this is a very good Rondeau. Thanks for sharing
dip
Comment Written 09-Jan-2017