2015 Haiku
Viewing comments for Chapter 25 "Haiku (first morning light)"A collection of haiku I wrote in 2015
43 total reviews
Comment from c_lucas
Early predawn is the best time to hear the birds celebrate the coming of a new day. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read.
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Early predawn is the best time to hear the birds celebrate the coming of a new day. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read.
Comment Written 15-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Thank you very much c lucas, I appreciate your excellent review.
Comment from Delahay
That is a beautiful picture you have chosen to accompany your writing. Both the picture and you poem make me think of mist rising off of a lake in the morning with the first rays of the sun reflecting off the water.
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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That is a beautiful picture you have chosen to accompany your writing. Both the picture and you poem make me think of mist rising off of a lake in the morning with the first rays of the sun reflecting off the water.
Comment Written 15-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Thank you very much, you got the right idea from this haiku. Thank you for the review.
Comment from patcelaw
This haiku is lovely with the photo. Haiku writing can be a very refreshing poetry format. Nature is fun to write about Keep up the good work and good luck in the contest.
Patricia
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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This haiku is lovely with the photo. Haiku writing can be a very refreshing poetry format. Nature is fun to write about Keep up the good work and good luck in the contest.
Patricia
Comment Written 15-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Thank you Patricia, I appreciate your review.
Comment from N.K. Wagner
The presentation is lovely...dawn light over a mist-covered lake. The satori is a giggle. Early bird special, indeed! An excellent job. Best of luck in your contest. :) Nancy
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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The presentation is lovely...dawn light over a mist-covered lake. The satori is a giggle. Early bird special, indeed! An excellent job. Best of luck in your contest. :) Nancy
Comment Written 15-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Thank you very much Nancy, I appreciate your review. :)
Comment from Louise Michelle
It's always hard for me to leave comments on these short, shorts, but this is a lovely presentation. The image is exquisite and your words compliment it nicely. A pleasant, relaxing read. Hugs, Lou
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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It's always hard for me to leave comments on these short, shorts, but this is a lovely presentation. The image is exquisite and your words compliment it nicely. A pleasant, relaxing read. Hugs, Lou
Comment Written 15-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Thank you very much Louise, I appreciate your review.
Comment from Glasstruth
Very serene and peaceful. Especially like the last line. It says it perfectly. Read the author notes and it seems that there are more rules than the syllable count allowed. Very creative. Good luck with the contest. Les
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Very serene and peaceful. Especially like the last line. It says it perfectly. Read the author notes and it seems that there are more rules than the syllable count allowed. Very creative. Good luck with the contest. Les
Comment Written 15-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Thank you very much for the lovely review and kind words. :)
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
This is a lovely haiku on light. Lines l and 2 interconnect perfectly and line three is a very good satori. Good descriptive work and your words perfectly suited to the subject of light. Gorgeous accompanying picture. Good Luck in the contest. Warm rgards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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This is a lovely haiku on light. Lines l and 2 interconnect perfectly and line three is a very good satori. Good descriptive work and your words perfectly suited to the subject of light. Gorgeous accompanying picture. Good Luck in the contest. Warm rgards Dorothy x
Comment Written 15-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Thank you very much for the lovely review and kind words. :)
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
This is a good haiku with excellent direct concrete imagery that is easy to picture: the morning light over the lake in hazy rays. And the satori is clever and apt. Good luck to you, Jeanie Mercer
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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This is a good haiku with excellent direct concrete imagery that is easy to picture: the morning light over the lake in hazy rays. And the satori is clever and apt. Good luck to you, Jeanie Mercer
Comment Written 15-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Thank you very much Jeanie, I appreciate your generous review.
Comment from LIJ Red
Again I say, I am no Haiku guru, so if this has the general shape of a Haiku, and
puts a pleasant image in my mind, I will deem it excellent. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Again I say, I am no Haiku guru, so if this has the general shape of a Haiku, and
puts a pleasant image in my mind, I will deem it excellent. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 15-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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Thank you very much for the excellent review. :)
Comment from alvina224224
A lovely looking haiku, author, but I can only count 4 syllables in the first line. Seven in the second line, and five in the final line. Perhaps a re-write is called for?
Love the illustration.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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A lovely looking haiku, author, but I can only count 4 syllables in the first line. Seven in the second line, and five in the final line. Perhaps a re-write is called for?
Love the illustration.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2015
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You didn't read the contest rules and you must not be familiar with haiku form. The rule states 17 syllables or less= in a short/long/short format, 4+7+5=16 that is under 17 syllables. Anyway, thank you for the review.
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I am so apologetic, and feel a proper dummy! Of course, you are correct. My fault for doing too many things at once
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no worries