All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "In Velvet Dark"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
87 total reviews
Comment from Gungalo
Congratulations girl for this little bit romance on and off the dance floor winning the top prize. It's definitely free verse which you don't have to count syllables in. Wonderful.
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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Congratulations girl for this little bit romance on and off the dance floor winning the top prize. It's definitely free verse which you don't have to count syllables in. Wonderful.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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It is, indeed, free verse which you don't have to count syllables in, gungalo! :)))))
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Then why the author's notes girl?
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to explain that it was free verse BUT constructed in a 4 syllable/ line FORM - usually free verse is just "free", no form or constriction at all, right? You know how people are -ooooh that's not "free" ... some stuff is the SAME , bad bad bad ... :)))
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Tch tch tch.
Comment from Galactia
Wow what a pleasure to read today,
very nicely done, smooth flowing free verse
favourite stanza....
take me home now
taut tuxedo
light my loving
in velvet dark
take my shoes off
caress my satin
and piece by piece
seduce
my
heart
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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Wow what a pleasure to read today,
very nicely done, smooth flowing free verse
favourite stanza....
take me home now
taut tuxedo
light my loving
in velvet dark
take my shoes off
caress my satin
and piece by piece
seduce
my
heart
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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thx so much Galactia :)Sharyn
Comment from JM daSilva
You certainly have a way with words. It's like you set me on fire right now. I feel like jumping, going to a party and getting the move on. Great poem.
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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You certainly have a way with words. It's like you set me on fire right now. I feel like jumping, going to a party and getting the move on. Great poem.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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I had fun with this one! :)S
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You're very lively. It's great. So much energy.
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Hi Sharyn, Congrats on your win with this wonderful dance that speaks to both heart and soul. Lovely imagery and sensual notes in this one. I enjoyed it very much.:)
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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Hi Sharyn, Congrats on your win with this wonderful dance that speaks to both heart and soul. Lovely imagery and sensual notes in this one. I enjoyed it very much.:)
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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thx Maureen - not a fireman, but nearly as good! :)S
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I'll say:D Woohoo
Comment from Ronni
Woweeee This is truly a hot presentation, totally
sensual, sexy, allluring, enticing and ramps up
the desires and passions to 'tilt' levels! A
soul dance merging all the moves and groves of
tha sumptous dance to the termores, enthralling
encores afterwards.... Whewwwwww.
Thanks for sharing....equally hot picture too...
Best wishes always...Ronni
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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Woweeee This is truly a hot presentation, totally
sensual, sexy, allluring, enticing and ramps up
the desires and passions to 'tilt' levels! A
soul dance merging all the moves and groves of
tha sumptous dance to the termores, enthralling
encores afterwards.... Whewwwwww.
Thanks for sharing....equally hot picture too...
Best wishes always...Ronni
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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thx so much Ronni - off to the cold shower with you! :)Sharyn
Comment from MizKat
Sharyn - I love your poem, Passionate Love in Black and White. It's great that you won the contest and also have it featured on the front page of FS. I always say fi re like it's two syllables. It doesn't sound right to me otherwise. (: A wonderful job on this, my friend. Kat
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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Sharyn - I love your poem, Passionate Love in Black and White. It's great that you won the contest and also have it featured on the front page of FS. I always say fi re like it's two syllables. It doesn't sound right to me otherwise. (: A wonderful job on this, my friend. Kat
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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thx so much Kat! Glad you enjoyed it! :)Sharyn
Comment from adewpearl
Congratulations on your contest win, Sharyn
I love the illustration and presentation
I like the internal rhyme in glide me, slide me and the strong verbs you use throughout in this invitation to passion
musky scented/soft and moist - good sensory and sensual details
lots of good alliteration and internal rhyme throughout - no wonder you won with this wonderfully passionate poem that never crosses that line to the vulgar :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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Congratulations on your contest win, Sharyn
I love the illustration and presentation
I like the internal rhyme in glide me, slide me and the strong verbs you use throughout in this invitation to passion
musky scented/soft and moist - good sensory and sensual details
lots of good alliteration and internal rhyme throughout - no wonder you won with this wonderfully passionate poem that never crosses that line to the vulgar :-) Brooke
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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thx so much, Brooke - always more fun NOT to be vulgar I find! :)S
Comment from clbritch
Love love love your picture choice. Congratulations. I see why this won. Your wording and description is excellent. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this piece. It is very passionate and romantic and I could feel the heat between them.
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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Love love love your picture choice. Congratulations. I see why this won. Your wording and description is excellent. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this piece. It is very passionate and romantic and I could feel the heat between them.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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thx so much cl! :)Sharyn
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You're very welcome.
Comment from Axiom Gray
Yeowza! Very hot! I really enjoyed this poem. The verse was rhythmic and it almost sang off the page. Your illustration is very cool, too. A jazzy roaring 20's scene was exactly what popped into my head. Excellent!
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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Yeowza! Very hot! I really enjoyed this poem. The verse was rhythmic and it almost sang off the page. Your illustration is very cool, too. A jazzy roaring 20's scene was exactly what popped into my head. Excellent!
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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thx so much Axiom ... off you go to the cold shower NOW, ok? :)Sharyn
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Oh, yea, felt the heat. Nice wording and description. Seduce my heart. Wonderful. This put the fire back in and it was fun to read.
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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Oh, yea, felt the heat. Nice wording and description. Seduce my heart. Wonderful. This put the fire back in and it was fun to read.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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thx so much Barb - so glad you enjoyed it! :)Sharyn