Contest Collage
Viewing comments for Chapter 26 "tanka (daisy petals dance)"keep your hope alive....
44 total reviews
Comment from heyjude
Miss Shelley, very well done. I remember those days
when I was young and blew on flowers to see what
my true love's name started with. How fun. Right on
with syllable count and great that it is also an
acrostic. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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Miss Shelley, very well done. I remember those days
when I was young and blew on flowers to see what
my true love's name started with. How fun. Right on
with syllable count and great that it is also an
acrostic. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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thank you jude :)
Comment from Janie King
I have no idea how to write a tanks but this is a delightful poem. I love daisies. I had a little poodle for 15 years that was named Daisy Mae...I built a little flower planter around her grave and planted daisies. God bless.
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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I have no idea how to write a tanks but this is a delightful poem. I love daisies. I had a little poodle for 15 years that was named Daisy Mae...I built a little flower planter around her grave and planted daisies. God bless.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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thank you janie :)
Comment from Gungalo
What a thoughtful write this is and it is perfectly written. You caught the wind to hear what it has to say. Good luck in the contest girl.
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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What a thoughtful write this is and it is perfectly written. You caught the wind to hear what it has to say. Good luck in the contest girl.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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thank you gungalo :)
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My pleasure.
Comment from mshirachot
What an absolutely perfect and delightful-to-read tanka poem. I love the Daisy photo at the bottom. Yours is the first I have seen with poem and art reversed and I have not yet experimented with doing that! You have excelled at making this entry exceptional with the acrostic aspect of it.
After reading the poem I noticed your name and chuckled a bit as you have the same spelling on the second half of your name as I...Kaye.
As I read this poem, I could visualize myself as a young girl, under a shade tree on a warm summer day,plucking petals off those daisies and wondering about love while the cool breeze kissed my face. Delightful!
Thank you so much for sharing this. Best wishes with the contest entry! You've inspired me to enter this contest myself.
Blessings!
Marsha
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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What an absolutely perfect and delightful-to-read tanka poem. I love the Daisy photo at the bottom. Yours is the first I have seen with poem and art reversed and I have not yet experimented with doing that! You have excelled at making this entry exceptional with the acrostic aspect of it.
After reading the poem I noticed your name and chuckled a bit as you have the same spelling on the second half of your name as I...Kaye.
As I read this poem, I could visualize myself as a young girl, under a shade tree on a warm summer day,plucking petals off those daisies and wondering about love while the cool breeze kissed my face. Delightful!
Thank you so much for sharing this. Best wishes with the contest entry! You've inspired me to enter this contest myself.
Blessings!
Marsha
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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cool! thank you marsha! :)
Comment from Carrie Carson
Good job with this, meeting both forms of the poems.
No spag issues, correct count.
I wonder how females ever got the notion that a flower and not beau's actions determine love. Enjoyable, thanks.
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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Good job with this, meeting both forms of the poems.
No spag issues, correct count.
I wonder how females ever got the notion that a flower and not beau's actions determine love. Enjoyable, thanks.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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lol thank you carrie :)
Comment from koolaid228
Very nice little read,this poem seems to have a message behind it,I enjoyed very much, It has a nice little flow as well as good rhythm,thank you so much for sharing. koolaid
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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Very nice little read,this poem seems to have a message behind it,I enjoyed very much, It has a nice little flow as well as good rhythm,thank you so much for sharing. koolaid
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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thank you koolaid :)
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You're very welcome.
Comment from Larry Talbot
Winsome little poem with a lot going for it. There is the mystery of the flower and the hint of "He/she loves me...he/she loves me not" to it.
I absolutely love four of the lines here. They flow beautifully. I didn't like "Silent you must be to hear" for a couple of reasons: the structure feels clunky to me in stark contrast to the elegance of the rest of the words and it felt like something of a contrived rhyme.
I understand you were trying to make it fit the acrostic...but that like flat out didn't work for me.
I like the light airy feel of the poem, though. Very well done!
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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Winsome little poem with a lot going for it. There is the mystery of the flower and the hint of "He/she loves me...he/she loves me not" to it.
I absolutely love four of the lines here. They flow beautifully. I didn't like "Silent you must be to hear" for a couple of reasons: the structure feels clunky to me in stark contrast to the elegance of the rest of the words and it felt like something of a contrived rhyme.
I understand you were trying to make it fit the acrostic...but that like flat out didn't work for me.
I like the light airy feel of the poem, though. Very well done!
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2012
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thank you larry - will see if i can fix that 's' line! any suggestions? great review!
Comment from nomi338
My heart skipped a beat or two as I read your beautiful words and absorbed your beautiful thought. It should never take an abundance of words to express a thought that goes onto paper as a clear thought. Stated simply it communicates, you communicate. Well done.
reply by the author on 18-May-2012
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My heart skipped a beat or two as I read your beautiful words and absorbed your beautiful thought. It should never take an abundance of words to express a thought that goes onto paper as a clear thought. Stated simply it communicates, you communicate. Well done.
Comment Written 17-May-2012
reply by the author on 18-May-2012
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thank you nomi :)
Comment from Sasha
I do hope you don't scratch me from your list when I say this but I cannot tell a tanka from a haiku but I will say with complete honestly I JUST LOVE THIS POEM....do you still like me? I wish you all the best in the contest too.
reply by the author on 18-May-2012
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I do hope you don't scratch me from your list when I say this but I cannot tell a tanka from a haiku but I will say with complete honestly I JUST LOVE THIS POEM....do you still like me? I wish you all the best in the contest too.
Comment Written 17-May-2012
reply by the author on 18-May-2012
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well, the tanka came first and is 5 lines.... the haiku derived from the tanka and is just three lines ;-)
Comment from Phoenix Rising
She loves me ...she loves me not, can daisy petals truly answer that age old question? ;-)
Who knows, either way it is a fun way to ask.
A charming poem.
Phoenix Rising
reply by the author on 17-May-2012
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She loves me ...she loves me not, can daisy petals truly answer that age old question? ;-)
Who knows, either way it is a fun way to ask.
A charming poem.
Phoenix Rising
Comment Written 17-May-2012
reply by the author on 17-May-2012
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lol thank you phoenix :)
