Poems from a Pensive Poet
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Grief"Verses from my heart
42 total reviews
Comment from Mrs Jones
This is absolutely beautiful true poetry. The reader feels your grief. The rhyming and the beat is perfect. A pleasure to read.
Well done
Cheers
Rose
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2010
  |
This is absolutely beautiful true poetry. The reader feels your grief. The rhyming and the beat is perfect. A pleasure to read.
Well done
Cheers
Rose
Comment Written 05-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2010
-
Thank you so much Rose for the really lovely review.
-
I especially want to thank you for the six stars. I didn't notice them at first.
-
Well deserved.
Comment from el twelve
this is very beautifully written, i could feel the emotion
through the words. i imagine anyone with a mother would.
powerful words and yet gentle. thanks
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2010
 |
this is very beautifully written, i could feel the emotion
through the words. i imagine anyone with a mother would.
powerful words and yet gentle. thanks
Comment Written 05-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2010
-
Thank you so much for the excellent review.
Comment from koyoga
Very sad poem reflecting a deep loss.
I liked the rhyming scheme and felt
the work flowed well. May I suggest
a different font/background combo - this
was hard on my eyes. Thanks for sharing
and best of luck.
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2010
|
Very sad poem reflecting a deep loss.
I liked the rhyming scheme and felt
the work flowed well. May I suggest
a different font/background combo - this
was hard on my eyes. Thanks for sharing
and best of luck.
Comment Written 05-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2010
-
Thank you so much for reviewing this. I also appreciate the suggestion for displaying.
Comment from adewpearl
My mother died when I was in second grade. I've shed many a tear since then, but for the first couple of months after she died, I was totally unable to cry about her or anything. My father sent me to a darned child psychiatrist as everyone was so worried. I completely understand what you are saying in this poem - it spoke directly to me. Our shared experience is given voice in your beautiful words, Beth. Brooke
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2010
|
My mother died when I was in second grade. I've shed many a tear since then, but for the first couple of months after she died, I was totally unable to cry about her or anything. My father sent me to a darned child psychiatrist as everyone was so worried. I completely understand what you are saying in this poem - it spoke directly to me. Our shared experience is given voice in your beautiful words, Beth. Brooke
Comment Written 05-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2010
-
Thank you Brooke, I'm glad you can understand. It must be terrible to lose a parent so young.
Beth
Comment from AlvinTEthington
This is a good poem about the conflict of filial devotion--one loves one's mother, but does not want to be smothered by her. You illustrate quiet grief quite well. The rhyme scheme of abcb works well. The poem has good iambic pentameter until the last two stanzas. However, since you did not state this was written in iambic pentameter, I cannot lower the rating for that. Excellent juxtaposition of picture and poem.
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2010
|
This is a good poem about the conflict of filial devotion--one loves one's mother, but does not want to be smothered by her. You illustrate quiet grief quite well. The rhyme scheme of abcb works well. The poem has good iambic pentameter until the last two stanzas. However, since you did not state this was written in iambic pentameter, I cannot lower the rating for that. Excellent juxtaposition of picture and poem.
Comment Written 04-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2010
-
Thank you Alvin, I do appreciate your review and kind comments.
-
You're welcome.
Comment from Connie P
I don't give up my 6 star ratings very easily, but this poem is such a perfect expression of grief too deep to express. I know that sounds redundant but it's true. Simple tears can't be shed because the pain goes too deep. Your description tells us that this is biographical. I hope that you will be able to cleanse your heart with the tears that will eventually come.
I hope you win this contest, although I realize that the contest is not what's important here.
Connie P
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2010
|
I don't give up my 6 star ratings very easily, but this poem is such a perfect expression of grief too deep to express. I know that sounds redundant but it's true. Simple tears can't be shed because the pain goes too deep. Your description tells us that this is biographical. I hope that you will be able to cleanse your heart with the tears that will eventually come.
I hope you win this contest, although I realize that the contest is not what's important here.
Connie P
Comment Written 04-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2010
-
Thank you so much for the six stars. I truly appreciate them and your lovely comments.
Comment from Kingmb
I hate when people say "it will get better, it just takes time", ever hear that one? From someone who has lost such a special person...it never gets better. Nice poem, these emotions need to be captured....good job
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2010
|
I hate when people say "it will get better, it just takes time", ever hear that one? From someone who has lost such a special person...it never gets better. Nice poem, these emotions need to be captured....good job
Comment Written 04-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2010
-
Thank you so much for the review. You can deal with it better in time but the hurt never goes away.
Comment from Charlene0513
A very disheartening poem that is based upon a love that has passed on. But her love for him flourishes within her, as there will be ever anyonee to take his place.
Error: Words can (do)no justice to my feelings,
**(Sug: There never, or ever was a time, I felt alone
Charlene
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2010
|
A very disheartening poem that is based upon a love that has passed on. But her love for him flourishes within her, as there will be ever anyonee to take his place.
Error: Words can (do)no justice to my feelings,
**(Sug: There never, or ever was a time, I felt alone
Charlene
Comment Written 04-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2010
-
Thank you for the review. I accidently released it before I was though editing. I have fixed those.
Comment from EllieKaye
Hello,
Wow. I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my mother three years ago and it is really something no one can understand but those who have experienced it. Yours sounds like she was very special indeed. Your poem shines with your feelings and I m so impressed that you were able to express so much in so few lines.
A couple things to note:
I struggled free to breath[e] a fresher air.
Words can [do] no justice to my feelings,
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2010
|
Hello,
Wow. I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my mother three years ago and it is really something no one can understand but those who have experienced it. Yours sounds like she was very special indeed. Your poem shines with your feelings and I m so impressed that you were able to express so much in so few lines.
A couple things to note:
I struggled free to breath[e] a fresher air.
Words can [do] no justice to my feelings,
Comment Written 04-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2010
-
Thank you for the nice review. I have fixed the spags but thank you for pointing them out.
Comment from ZigzagMLT
I like your poem, it's touching. It is a testament to your mother. Nice.
Perhaps you'll want to entertain a thought for what I found while reading your piece. Only suggestions.
breathe fresher air
I don't think you need that much punctuation, but it's a personal choice
There never was a time when I felt alone
do no justice
Thanks for sharing.
Zigzagmlt
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2010
 |
I like your poem, it's touching. It is a testament to your mother. Nice.
Perhaps you'll want to entertain a thought for what I found while reading your piece. Only suggestions.
breathe fresher air
I don't think you need that much punctuation, but it's a personal choice
There never was a time when I felt alone
do no justice
Thanks for sharing.
Zigzagmlt
Comment Written 04-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2010
-
Thank you for the review. I have fixed the breathe and several other things that got passed me before it was supposed to released.