The Sperm Donor, Susan's Story
Part IV, The conclusion.34 total reviews
Comment from karenina
Nice! You sure did that double summersault with a triple twist and stuck the landing! I never suspected Chet was a son! You did very well to sneak up on us that way. Seems Susan and Gail were conniving long before he even thought of becoming a sperm donor! Hah. Just goes to show you~ some of our best ideas? May not have been ours, to begin with!
Nicely conceived. (I couldn't resist that!)
Karenina
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2022
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Nice! You sure did that double summersault with a triple twist and stuck the landing! I never suspected Chet was a son! You did very well to sneak up on us that way. Seems Susan and Gail were conniving long before he even thought of becoming a sperm donor! Hah. Just goes to show you~ some of our best ideas? May not have been ours, to begin with!
Nicely conceived. (I couldn't resist that!)
Karenina
Comment Written 05-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2022
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LOL! Karenina, that is a great review and a killer last line! Terry.
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Grin.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Thank you for sharing this installment with us. I enjoyed how this ended.
I don't like stories that have installments that start each new chapter with a summary of previous events. (I do it because it's been a reviewer request. Many reviewers have stated it helps. I didn't used to do it.)
he lead investigator for the Kenyon Law Firm, just told him concerning his former girlfriend. (try - had told him. I read it this way, but either is correct. You're the author.)
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2022
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Thank you for sharing this installment with us. I enjoyed how this ended.
I don't like stories that have installments that start each new chapter with a summary of previous events. (I do it because it's been a reviewer request. Many reviewers have stated it helps. I didn't used to do it.)
he lead investigator for the Kenyon Law Firm, just told him concerning his former girlfriend. (try - had told him. I read it this way, but either is correct. You're the author.)
Comment Written 05-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2022
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Barbara, Thank you for reading and reviewing. I will take a look at the line you mentioned. Terry.
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It can go either way. Both are correct.
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I just reread it and remember why I wrote it that way. Giraffmang (Gareth) had suggested in a previous installment that it would read better if I could cut down on the use of 'was' and 'had'; I was trying to avoid as many as possible. I think I do use too many. Terry.
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no problem
Comment from LovnPeace
Wow, what a twist. If I was Sam, I might have been angry enough to kill for what he was cheated out of. Bravo for their respect and in a way, he was a dad. Blessings, Barbara
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2022
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Wow, what a twist. If I was Sam, I might have been angry enough to kill for what he was cheated out of. Bravo for their respect and in a way, he was a dad. Blessings, Barbara
Comment Written 05-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2022
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Barbara, Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! Terry.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
This is terrific. Your story really grabbed my interest. I can only imagine that if I was in that situation I would be dying with curiosity. And your story helped me visualize that. Very well written. Nice pacing and I loved the twist at the ending! I did not see that coming. I like happy endings. :)
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reply by the author on 05-Aug-2022
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This is terrific. Your story really grabbed my interest. I can only imagine that if I was in that situation I would be dying with curiosity. And your story helped me visualize that. Very well written. Nice pacing and I loved the twist at the ending! I did not see that coming. I like happy endings. :)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 05-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2022
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Michael, thank you for reading and reviewing! I am delighted you enjoyed it. Terry.
