Betrayal
Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "Betrayal Chapter 31"In the title.
36 total reviews
Comment from Jay Squires
Ohhh, Sandra, please don't let yourself get in a real wasp nest as an artist. Please be careful. I catch a sniff of it, but it seems like you're aware, but are trying to avoid it. I'm speaking about Author Intrusion. I'm sure you know what it is. I wrote about it in my Critter Series here. (I don't know whether you remember it.) There was a chapter called, "Three More Illusion Crashers." You might want to take a look at it. Not now-- (and I'm not trying to drum up business for it. It doesn't need more reviews.) Here's the link to tuck away for some rainy day: https://fanstory.com/displaystory.jsp?id=141346. Tell me if the link doesn't work.
'How the hell did they know where Grant had taken her?' (That's your quote, by the way, I'm not being accusatory.) {More importantly, Do they know? I keep going back to mother and son's conversation and don't see anything that answers that question.}
I didn't find one thing awry, Sandra, in spite of my sounding all tutorial and critical. It was more in way of being a warning for something I hadn't observed as yet. The tension you created with the Hurricane scene was superb!
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Ohhh, Sandra, please don't let yourself get in a real wasp nest as an artist. Please be careful. I catch a sniff of it, but it seems like you're aware, but are trying to avoid it. I'm speaking about Author Intrusion. I'm sure you know what it is. I wrote about it in my Critter Series here. (I don't know whether you remember it.) There was a chapter called, "Three More Illusion Crashers." You might want to take a look at it. Not now-- (and I'm not trying to drum up business for it. It doesn't need more reviews.) Here's the link to tuck away for some rainy day: https://fanstory.com/displaystory.jsp?id=141346. Tell me if the link doesn't work.
'How the hell did they know where Grant had taken her?' (That's your quote, by the way, I'm not being accusatory.) {More importantly, Do they know? I keep going back to mother and son's conversation and don't see anything that answers that question.}
I didn't find one thing awry, Sandra, in spite of my sounding all tutorial and critical. It was more in way of being a warning for something I hadn't observed as yet. The tension you created with the Hurricane scene was superb!
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Thank you, Jay, for your concern. I've had first-hand experience with a hurricane not at bad as this one will be, but still bad enough, while we were on honeymoon in Jamaica. Not a pleasant experience and certainly wouldn't want to go back there in the hurricane season again!
Now, the next query, how did they know where Grant and Tania are? You'll have to wait for that! lol. I'm not saying anything, but you'll get it when it's revealed.
I'm really pleased with your review, Jay, it's wonderful, and thank you for the thumbs up on the tension I've created. That really meant a lot. I'm going to take a look at that chapter you've given me the link for. I do like to learn as I go. Thank you so much for the six stars, my friend, and all the help you've talked to me about. Warm hugs. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from Pam (respa)
-An excellent chapter, Sandra, that
has a lot going on.
-The wasp is very interesting and
you describe how they get it into
the house very well.
-I think you could now join the
ranks of a spy novelist!
-The conversation between Colin
and his mother is also interesting,
and shows the attitude of each.
-Surprisingly, Marilyn speaks up to
Colin, basically telling him to
get his act together, making us
forget that he had also been hit,
and his jaw had been wired; it
should probably stay that way!!
-The news about Rapier doesn't
sound good, and every time you
got the storm brewing harder
in the Bahamas, I kept thinking
it was Rapier doing something.
-You build the suspense of the
approaching hurricane very well, too.
-The ending adds to it and leaves
us wondering exactly what is going on!
-Well done, my friend.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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-An excellent chapter, Sandra, that
has a lot going on.
-The wasp is very interesting and
you describe how they get it into
the house very well.
-I think you could now join the
ranks of a spy novelist!
-The conversation between Colin
and his mother is also interesting,
and shows the attitude of each.
-Surprisingly, Marilyn speaks up to
Colin, basically telling him to
get his act together, making us
forget that he had also been hit,
and his jaw had been wired; it
should probably stay that way!!
-The news about Rapier doesn't
sound good, and every time you
got the storm brewing harder
in the Bahamas, I kept thinking
it was Rapier doing something.
-You build the suspense of the
approaching hurricane very well, too.
-The ending adds to it and leaves
us wondering exactly what is going on!
-Well done, my friend.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Thank you so much, dear Pam, for this lovely review. I had to laugh at the part where you thought Rapier was causing the storm! I'm so pleased you enjoyed the ending. I don't know about me becoming a spy novelist, I'll leave that to the experts. :)) Thank you for the lovely six stars, my friend. I really appreciate this amazing review and the stars you've attached to it. Sending you a huge hug, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
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You are very welcome and deserving of the stars and review, Sandra. I didn't think Rapier was causing the storm, but he was doing something to try and get in the house, etc. Maybe he had super human powers:):)
Comment from Ben Colder
Oh the art of technology. We are son advance but yet innocent to the things to come. They have the goods on them now and no jury can deny that. Hurricane? I named my first Girl after Hurricane Cindy. I enjoy your story. Keep it coming.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Oh the art of technology. We are son advance but yet innocent to the things to come. They have the goods on them now and no jury can deny that. Hurricane? I named my first Girl after Hurricane Cindy. I enjoy your story. Keep it coming.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Thank you so very much, Chuck, for this lovely review and the six beautiful stars. You are so right when it comes to how advanced we are, yet so innocent in what's to come. You really are so wise, my friend. Hurricane Cindy? It must have impacted you a lot to have named your daughter after it. I bet she's the most placid, kind lady there is to meet, and not at all like a hurricane!! Lol. Thanks, dear friend. I'm glad you enjoyed this part. Warm hugs. Sandra xxx
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I was driving for Greyhound during the time of the Hurricane Cindy with 80 miles per hour tail winds.
Comment from Pantygynt
The excitement is building and the fire is stoked by the device of pathetic fallacy - in this case the hurricane. The wasp drone has proved its worth but communications for everyone are likely to be affected by the onset of the hurricane.
a most exciting chapter this. Great stuff.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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The excitement is building and the fire is stoked by the device of pathetic fallacy - in this case the hurricane. The wasp drone has proved its worth but communications for everyone are likely to be affected by the onset of the hurricane.
a most exciting chapter this. Great stuff.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Yes, you're right on all counts. Thank you so much, Jim, for another lovely review and a big hug for the six stars! I'm so pleased you enjoyed this part, I always like to read your thoughts on my chapters. Thanks Jim. :)) Sandra xx
As you might have seen at the end of this part, we are moving to Romsey. It was quite sudden, but we'll be nearer my sons and my grandchildren. And nearer the New Forest which is lovely. I'll call you when I can. :))
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Maybe Shadow will get killed in the hurricane. That would make life a lot easier. How could he possibly know where they're at. I really like this story. It gets better and better.
It reminded her of the last James Bond movie she'd watched. I could be Moneypenny! ('I could be Moneypenny!' probably should be in italics)
and a man Monica had never met climbed in and sat next to her. (sat beside her)
Reg manoeuvred it to check out every window it came to, (you can omit 'out')
and, much to their relief, they found an open one. (found one open.)
He moved over and sat next to her. (sat beside her)
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Maybe Shadow will get killed in the hurricane. That would make life a lot easier. How could he possibly know where they're at. I really like this story. It gets better and better.
It reminded her of the last James Bond movie she'd watched. I could be Moneypenny! ('I could be Moneypenny!' probably should be in italics)
and a man Monica had never met climbed in and sat next to her. (sat beside her)
Reg manoeuvred it to check out every window it came to, (you can omit 'out')
and, much to their relief, they found an open one. (found one open.)
He moved over and sat next to her. (sat beside her)
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Thank you so much, Barbara, for your great edits and the lovely review. I'm glad you enjoyed this part, the hurricane is getting really close now. And the team in London are wondering who leaked the information of Grant and Tania's whereabouts. Thank you also for the lovely six stars, my friend. I really appreciate you. Warm hugs. Sandra xx
Comment from Begin Again
Oh my gosh...I've been in the squalls of a hurricane once, and that was enough. I can't imagine the fear going through their heads and with Latifah about to give birth...And we must have a mole somewhere if Rapier knows Grant's whereabouts. Not sounding good for the island crew at all. A wonderful setting of the scene and also the one with the wasp-spy. Truly a James Bond type of story! Well done. Smiles and hugs - Carol
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Oh my gosh...I've been in the squalls of a hurricane once, and that was enough. I can't imagine the fear going through their heads and with Latifah about to give birth...And we must have a mole somewhere if Rapier knows Grant's whereabouts. Not sounding good for the island crew at all. A wonderful setting of the scene and also the one with the wasp-spy. Truly a James Bond type of story! Well done. Smiles and hugs - Carol
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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I've never actually been in a hurricane before, only been to Jamaica a week after they'd have one, so I know what damage they can do. You must have been scared even if it was a squall, they are bad enough.
Thank you so much for this lovely review and the six shiny stars, my friend. I'm glad you enjoyed reading this part. Warm hugs, and good luck tomorrow. :)) Sandra xxx
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Smiles and thanks...