Shoo, Shoo, Away!
Rhyming Quatrain27 total reviews
Comment from kiwisteveh
And then I whacked it with a shout;
I gave it merry hell!
But though I put the wasp to rout,
I whacked myself as well!
The key to your rhyming quatrains is the bouncy meter which, coupled with the strong rhyme, makes the little story easy to read - so I thought I'd join in the fun.
Steve
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019
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And then I whacked it with a shout;
I gave it merry hell!
But though I put the wasp to rout,
I whacked myself as well!
The key to your rhyming quatrains is the bouncy meter which, coupled with the strong rhyme, makes the little story easy to read - so I thought I'd join in the fun.
Steve
Comment Written 14-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019
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Haha!!! Great verse. Yep, not a fan of wasps!! I do not like them in my house, I do not like them more than louse, I do not like them near a cat, I do not like them, that is that!!! Thanks for the great review, Steve!
Melissa
Comment from jmshumate
This is a really nice poem, it has a really energetic flow to it with excellent rhyming words. I like bumble bees around my garden, but wasps I definitely don't care for, they are always on the attack. Good job!
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019
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This is a really nice poem, it has a really energetic flow to it with excellent rhyming words. I like bumble bees around my garden, but wasps I definitely don't care for, they are always on the attack. Good job!
Comment Written 14-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019
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Yep, not a fan of wasps!! I do not like them in my house, I do not like them more than louse, I do not like them near a cat, I do not like them, that is that!!! Thanks for the great review!
Melissa
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:)
Comment from Mistydawn
This is a cute poem, a fun little read. It's very descriptive, I can actually picture someone doing this. Your artwork is funny, perfect for the poem. I wouldn't be shooing the wasp no I'd be the one running the other way. Tried to kill a wasp once missed and it came after me. The darn demonic bug hits a curtain fell in dishwater and drowned. I now run for cover when something flies around my head.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019
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This is a cute poem, a fun little read. It's very descriptive, I can actually picture someone doing this. Your artwork is funny, perfect for the poem. I wouldn't be shooing the wasp no I'd be the one running the other way. Tried to kill a wasp once missed and it came after me. The darn demonic bug hits a curtain fell in dishwater and drowned. I now run for cover when something flies around my head.
Comment Written 14-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019
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Yep, not a fan of wasps!! I do not like them in my house, I do not like them more than louse, I do not like them near a cat, I do not like them, that is that!!! Thanks for the great review, Misty!
Melissa
Comment from Ms. Snyder
Hi Melissa,
We used to get something called Mud-hoppers in the house they would nest in the wood in our porch corners in Ohio. I despised them so much that when one would get in, I would follow it with the vacuum cleaner wand from the second I spotted it. The mud-hoppers wasps were black and used to like to hide in my kitchen curtains over my sink where I had this fluorescent bulb and out of nowhere while I would be washing dishes they would come down like a helicopter just waiting to land on a landing post. The steam would attract them somehow. Not like a bee. And they drove me crazy sometimes I could get them sometimes they would get out the way they got in. Which was some crack into the wood that made up the really old house we live in. It was built all the way back in 1800 and originally didn't have a bathroom etc. As much as I hated that house I do miss the people, a lot, but not for one second do I miss the buzzes, the flying by my head and flaying at it dizzily - this poem was exactly what I would do when one would be around me. The caught in a faithless fear made me laugh. I love when you write something that purely connects on my wavelength - it is great! Cheers, Fonda
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019
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Hi Melissa,
We used to get something called Mud-hoppers in the house they would nest in the wood in our porch corners in Ohio. I despised them so much that when one would get in, I would follow it with the vacuum cleaner wand from the second I spotted it. The mud-hoppers wasps were black and used to like to hide in my kitchen curtains over my sink where I had this fluorescent bulb and out of nowhere while I would be washing dishes they would come down like a helicopter just waiting to land on a landing post. The steam would attract them somehow. Not like a bee. And they drove me crazy sometimes I could get them sometimes they would get out the way they got in. Which was some crack into the wood that made up the really old house we live in. It was built all the way back in 1800 and originally didn't have a bathroom etc. As much as I hated that house I do miss the people, a lot, but not for one second do I miss the buzzes, the flying by my head and flaying at it dizzily - this poem was exactly what I would do when one would be around me. The caught in a faithless fear made me laugh. I love when you write something that purely connects on my wavelength - it is great! Cheers, Fonda
Comment Written 14-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019
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Yep, not a fan of wasps!! I do not like them in my house, I do not like them more than louse, I do not like them near a cat, I do not like them, that is that!!! Thanks for the great review, Fonda!
Melissa
Comment from lyenochka
Oh no! Wasps can be dangerous - I think their stingers are worse than bees' stings. Enjoyed the bouncy beat and the well chosen rhymes. Can relate to "faithless fears" in situations like that!
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019
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Oh no! Wasps can be dangerous - I think their stingers are worse than bees' stings. Enjoyed the bouncy beat and the well chosen rhymes. Can relate to "faithless fears" in situations like that!
Comment Written 14-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019
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Yep, not a fan of wasps!! I do not like them in my house, I do not like them more than louse, I do not like them near a cat, I do not like them, that is that!!! Thanks for the great review, Helen.
Melissa
Comment from CD Richards
I know the feeling. We had wasps building nests under our eaves a few days ago, and there are massive hornets that love to buzz around my man-cave from time to time. I've never been stung by either, but I swell up like a balloon after a bee sting, so I imagine they could well be the end of me lol
So, my commiserations, but congratulations on a fun and very well-written poem.
Craig
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reply by the author on 14-Feb-2019
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I know the feeling. We had wasps building nests under our eaves a few days ago, and there are massive hornets that love to buzz around my man-cave from time to time. I've never been stung by either, but I swell up like a balloon after a bee sting, so I imagine they could well be the end of me lol
So, my commiserations, but congratulations on a fun and very well-written poem.
Craig
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Comment Written 14-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2019
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Thank you very much, Craig.... I do not like the critters at all!!
Melissa
Comment from Miss Sherry
Funny--funny...darn things just won't hold still long enough. The artwork is hilarious. Poor guy needs a cat and he wouldn't have to worry. My Chico snags them right out of the air and then hands them to me--gross! They have a nasty sting so watch out!!
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reply by the author on 14-Feb-2019
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Funny--funny...darn things just won't hold still long enough. The artwork is hilarious. Poor guy needs a cat and he wouldn't have to worry. My Chico snags them right out of the air and then hands them to me--gross! They have a nasty sting so watch out!!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2019
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Hey there, Sherry... I do not like them from a cat, I do not like them where I sat, I do not like them in the air, I do not like them anywhere!!! Thanks for the great review!
Melissa
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Really big LOL!! So, how's THAT?