NFL: 'Nuff Flap Lines
tiresome 'stances' of public figures40 total reviews
Comment from honeytree
Excellent artwork
for these words written
So much has been said
within these words.
Kicking a ball is better
then politics.
Honey tree
I have no six left
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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Excellent artwork
for these words written
So much has been said
within these words.
Kicking a ball is better
then politics.
Honey tree
I have no six left
Comment Written 29-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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Thank you for reviewing.
Comment from rama devi
Good entry. It captures an attitude of one-pointed focus. Good showing not telling. There is a spacing typo...add a space after the colon. I further recommend using a period, semicolon or dash in line one for a stronger dramatic pause effect. Good presentation. I love the inventive rhyme. Good luck.
Warmly, rd
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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Good entry. It captures an attitude of one-pointed focus. Good showing not telling. There is a spacing typo...add a space after the colon. I further recommend using a period, semicolon or dash in line one for a stronger dramatic pause effect. Good presentation. I love the inventive rhyme. Good luck.
Warmly, rd
Comment Written 29-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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Thank you for reviewing.
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:-))
Comment from kiwigirl2821
This is a good entry into the seven words or less poem contest. So much tv exposure to this crazy nfl business. You either believe or you don't . xoxo Kiwi
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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This is a good entry into the seven words or less poem contest. So much tv exposure to this crazy nfl business. You either believe or you don't . xoxo Kiwi
Comment Written 29-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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Thank you for reviewing.
Comment from Dean Kuch
What's all this nonsense about equality anyhow?
The increase in black homicides last year comes on top of a previous 900-victim increase between 2014 and 2015.
Who is killing these black victims? Not whites, and not the police, but other blacks.
In 2016, the police fatally shot 233 blacks, the vast majority armed and dangerous, according to the Washington Post. The paper categorized only 16 black male victims of police shootings as "unarmed." That classification masks assaults against officers and violent resistance to arrest.
Contrary to the Black Lives Matter narrative, the police have much more to fear from black males than black males have to fear from the police. In 2015, a police officer was 18.5 times more likely to be killed by a black male than an unarmed black male was to be killed by a police officer.
Black males have made up 42 percent of all cop-killers over the last decade, though they are only 6 percent of the population. That 18.5 ratio undoubtedly worsened in 2016, in light of the 53 percent increase in gun murders of officers -- committed vastly and disproportionately by black males.
Among all homicide suspects whose race was known, white killers of blacks numbered only 243.
That's about all I have to say on the matter.
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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What's all this nonsense about equality anyhow?
The increase in black homicides last year comes on top of a previous 900-victim increase between 2014 and 2015.
Who is killing these black victims? Not whites, and not the police, but other blacks.
In 2016, the police fatally shot 233 blacks, the vast majority armed and dangerous, according to the Washington Post. The paper categorized only 16 black male victims of police shootings as "unarmed." That classification masks assaults against officers and violent resistance to arrest.
Contrary to the Black Lives Matter narrative, the police have much more to fear from black males than black males have to fear from the police. In 2015, a police officer was 18.5 times more likely to be killed by a black male than an unarmed black male was to be killed by a police officer.
Black males have made up 42 percent of all cop-killers over the last decade, though they are only 6 percent of the population. That 18.5 ratio undoubtedly worsened in 2016, in light of the 53 percent increase in gun murders of officers -- committed vastly and disproportionately by black males.
Among all homicide suspects whose race was known, white killers of blacks numbered only 243.
That's about all I have to say on the matter.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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Thank you for reviewing.
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Sure...
I hope my vote helps too.
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Thanks Dean, very kind of you. Dennis
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My pleasure, Dennis.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This speaks how people are tired of wrong, immoral, unethical and inhuman political activities by the political leaders; this moment is to forget being politic and for kicking the ball; I liked.
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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This speaks how people are tired of wrong, immoral, unethical and inhuman political activities by the political leaders; this moment is to forget being politic and for kicking the ball; I liked.
Comment Written 28-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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Thank you for reviewing.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Yes! It is a game. Politics should not be included. Good job on your short poem [I know you were restricted in length].
Best wishes in the contest. Jan
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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Yes! It is a game. Politics should not be included. Good job on your short poem [I know you were restricted in length].
Best wishes in the contest. Jan
Comment Written 28-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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Thank you for reviewing.
Comment from evesayshi
In my opinion - you did it! It wasn't easy, either - it's surprising how many words we need to say so little - your political reference is perfect in this regard, and the poem is fully compliant with the prompt...
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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In my opinion - you did it! It wasn't easy, either - it's surprising how many words we need to say so little - your political reference is perfect in this regard, and the poem is fully compliant with the prompt...
Comment Written 28-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2017
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Thank you for reviewing.
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You are welcome...
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Pretty good, but the last line could be better. The nfl (small letters intentional) players who are kneeling during the national anthem, for the most part, have no idea what they are protesting. It started out as an inequality statement, morphed into a black lives matter argument, and is now just a protest against President Trump.
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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Pretty good, but the last line could be better. The nfl (small letters intentional) players who are kneeling during the national anthem, for the most part, have no idea what they are protesting. It started out as an inequality statement, morphed into a black lives matter argument, and is now just a protest against President Trump.
Comment Written 28-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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Pretty good review, but the larger part is just another opinion. Could be better. :)
Comment from Father Flaps
Hi Mystery Author
You get your point across in 6 words. And you clinch a rhyme as well,
"politic/kick"
Do politics have a place in sports? I know what you're getting at. I've heard the argument before. The players are using their sport to make a point. And now, I hear, other professional athletes are being urged to act similarly. Perhaps baseball, soccer, basketball will follow.
It's bad enough to watch these NFL'ers prance and dance after they score a touchdown. They're like a bunch of ballerinas after they get a touchdown. It's like they suddenly don't know what to do with the ball!
Good Luck in the contest!
cheers
Kimbob
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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Hi Mystery Author
You get your point across in 6 words. And you clinch a rhyme as well,
"politic/kick"
Do politics have a place in sports? I know what you're getting at. I've heard the argument before. The players are using their sport to make a point. And now, I hear, other professional athletes are being urged to act similarly. Perhaps baseball, soccer, basketball will follow.
It's bad enough to watch these NFL'ers prance and dance after they score a touchdown. They're like a bunch of ballerinas after they get a touchdown. It's like they suddenly don't know what to do with the ball!
Good Luck in the contest!
cheers
Kimbob
Comment Written 28-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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As Vince Lombardi said of TD rejoicing, "Act like you've been there before".
Thank you!
Comment from pipersfancy
I see that your focus is on rhyming "politic" with "kick". Grammatically, it doesn't work terribly well as "politic" is an adjective being used as a noun. Punctuation does not enhance the poet's intended meaning. (Yes... I'm one of THOSE reviewers who feels spelling, grammar and punctuation are important in the presentation of the poem.)
For your consideration:
Forget the politics.
See the ball? Kick!
(still meets the requirement of 7 words or less)
Good luck,
pf
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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I see that your focus is on rhyming "politic" with "kick". Grammatically, it doesn't work terribly well as "politic" is an adjective being used as a noun. Punctuation does not enhance the poet's intended meaning. (Yes... I'm one of THOSE reviewers who feels spelling, grammar and punctuation are important in the presentation of the poem.)
For your consideration:
Forget the politics.
See the ball? Kick!
(still meets the requirement of 7 words or less)
Good luck,
pf
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 28-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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Aw shudup! Just kidding...I'm one of those writers that defend my work...sometimes. Kick and politics don't rhyme, so I'll trust reviewers, who like me, think politic can be used as a noun, or simply don't care. BTW, good luck on keeping English to a norm. :) Cheers, Dennis