Reviews from

Perennials of War

Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "Chapter Sechs part drei"
Is Anderson a gallant knight? Can he recover Shan

32 total reviews 
Comment from rtobaygo
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Good morning, Barbara

Good crisp believable dialogue. Your characters come alive as does the scene. Growing up we had a pool table in the rec room, so I can relate to the scene.

Take care and stay safe,

Ray



 Comment Written 13-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2017
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ulla
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi Barbara, Ahhh, here we go. The first hint of attraction between Shana and Anderson. Great. I liked this chapter a lot. Looking forward to happens next. All the best. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2017
    Thank you for the kind review. Shana and Anderson have a lot of issues ahead of them.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Superb, Barbara, I'm really enjoying your story. I enjoyed the little hint of attraction on Anderson's part, lol, no more lessons for Shana for a while! It was nice to have a little light moment amid the tension and intrigue, this is what makes the whole story believable. Well done, my friend! :) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2017
    Thank you for the generous review.
Comment from royowen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Ah, it looks like Anderson is besotted by Shana, certainly being close to her, it's obvious he found it tough not to kiss, but like a good boy, restraints himself. It looks like they've straightened out the misunderstand, where to from here? Well done, Barbara, good scribing, blessings, Roy

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2017
    Thank you for the kind review.
reply by royowen on 13-Mar-2017
    Most welcome Barbara
Comment from Sis Cat
Excellent
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"Her skin's soft."

Yep! That's all Anderson needs to know for now. That casual touch speaks volumes.

Then there was his sense of smell: "Anderson inhaled the scent of Shana's hair. Lavender. I can't do this."

Terrified of falling in love with Shana, he steps back and tells Helen to prepare dinner.

I love how you go slow and show the two struggling against their growing feelings towards one another. There is mutual attraction and fear of violating taboos and being subject to public scrutiny based upon perceived behavior.

I am really getting into your story. You are right, I care more about their possible romance than the history of the stolen painting. What the painting really is is a backdrop to the art of love unfolding before it.

Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 13-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2017
    It sure is. You've figured my writing out. Thank you.
Comment from Lu Saluna
Excellent
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The chapter was very well-written. Good conversational dialogue, just the right coyness going between Philip and Drew to know they have a little secret.
There was just enough intimacy to let the reader know there was definitely an attraction between Drew and Shana.

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 12-Mar-2017
    Thank you for the encouraging review.
Comment from MelB
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi Barbara, a well written chapter. Just enough to keep the suspense going. There was a lot of sexual tension between Shana and Anderson.

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 12-Mar-2017
    Thank you for the kind review.
reply by MelB on 12-Mar-2017
    You're welcome.
Comment from Heidi M
Excellent
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You did a great job showing how he's connecting with her on a physical level. You might want to consider showing how he's also attracted to her mind, character and personality.
I like how you're handling this story line.
(Did) you wait for Isaiah's

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 12-Mar-2017
    I will show more in bit and pieces. I off to make that correction. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Sixty70
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Yes, I think that Anderson shows he is at least attracted to Shana. Is she also attracted to him? She makes an issue of accepting the clothes because of the expense. Does she think she might have to repay him, or does she simply think it inappropriate?

SPAG:
Do (Did) you wait for Isaiah's answer? Did you

As far as I'm concerned(,) this discussion is

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 12-Mar-2017
    I will make those corrections. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from mbroyles2
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I truly am enjoying this story.This is our first hint of some chemistry between Shana and Anderson.
The household is starting to pick up the hint as well.
Great writing!
Michael

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2017


reply by the author on 12-Mar-2017
    Thank you for the encouraging review. I was worried about this post.