One last kiss
We meet again27 total reviews
Comment from Sis Cat
I love the sentiments of this poem, too. It tracks a love that survived a lifetime, from youth to old age, and even past death itself. You describe the type of love many crave but few have or witnessed. Your poem is well rhymed and composed. Your sentiments are endearing. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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I love the sentiments of this poem, too. It tracks a love that survived a lifetime, from youth to old age, and even past death itself. You describe the type of love many crave but few have or witnessed. Your poem is well rhymed and composed. Your sentiments are endearing. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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Young love that's lost through separate lives only to find it again in the twilight of their lives The bodies might change but their hearts don't.
dip
Comment from Bobbi22
This is a very sweet sentimental poem telling of a childhood love that was paused for almost a lifetime, only to be rekindled in the senior years. Some feelings just never go away. Very nicely done. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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This is a very sweet sentimental poem telling of a childhood love that was paused for almost a lifetime, only to be rekindled in the senior years. Some feelings just never go away. Very nicely done. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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That's exactly how it is RightPics you have said the sentiments of this write so succinctly thank you for understanding its sentiments
dip
Comment from Poetic Friend
Wow, Dip, this is one of your best! The poem expresses a mixture of emotions -- love, pain, loss, longing, romance.
Of course, the emotions are well-weaved in perfect rhyme and meter.
I have not been on the site for a couple of weeks. Did you post your Valentine's Day poetic gem?
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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Wow, Dip, this is one of your best! The poem expresses a mixture of emotions -- love, pain, loss, longing, romance.
Of course, the emotions are well-weaved in perfect rhyme and meter.
I have not been on the site for a couple of weeks. Did you post your Valentine's Day poetic gem?
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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haha wow that means a lot to me P thankyou
Yeah I posted one back on Valentine's day I would be honoured for you to check my profile for the poems you may have missed that might strike a chord with you
dip
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Yes this is well written my friend full of emotion and a love story that unfolded although the characters went in different directions I enjoyed this beautiful poem regards Jill
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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Yes this is well written my friend full of emotion and a love story that unfolded although the characters went in different directions I enjoyed this beautiful poem regards Jill
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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Thankyou so much Jill much appreciated
dip
Comment from Dean Kuch
For itwere was you! You had a tear... ... Queen's English or not, bro', "was" is the correct word to use here...
Your commas and where they are placed literally drive me to near insanity, Dip.
A comma is used to indicate a pause...a "breath", or brief pause in the thought process, if you will.
A break in the narrative.
For example, when speaking, would you say to someone: "G'day, mate. My, that's a, quite lovely, leather coat you're, sportin' there!"
No, of course you wouldn't (at least I hope to God you wouldn't!).
As for the sentiments expressed here I thought they were lovely.
Just pah-leeeeease, lose those pesky, unnecessary commas...
~Deano
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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For it
Your commas and where they are placed literally drive me to near insanity, Dip.
A comma is used to indicate a pause...a "breath", or brief pause in the thought process, if you will.
A break in the narrative.
For example, when speaking, would you say to someone: "G'day, mate. My, that's a, quite lovely, leather coat you're, sportin' there!"
No, of course you wouldn't (at least I hope to God you wouldn't!).
As for the sentiments expressed here I thought they were lovely.
Just pah-leeeeease, lose those pesky, unnecessary commas...
~Deano
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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no excuse i wrote this 4 years ago and had a whole different approach befor i came to the anal grammar nazis of fanstory lol
you know why i used commas in those days and still to this dsay? because no one knows how i want my poetry to be read so i feel i have to use commas unnecessarily well that's my excuse and I am sticking to it lol i will revisit just for you as for were and was I have seen . if it were for you in many writes so the jury is out with that one.
thanks for the review
dip
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fk! I just revisited there WERE a lot of unnecessary commas hey I have removed and if anyone tells me the fkg rhythm, beat, meters wrong i'll go off my fkg brain!! lol
As long as they know how to use inflection, pause, accentuate, stress and un stress when reading I'll be happy
respectfully dip
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Now THAT is perfect, Doc!
Great job!
It''ll pay off, you'll see...
~Deano
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Hey dean while I've got you would you say the below review was offensive for me using the word 'assume'?
For your review on My Days by evesayshi
Beautiful words Eve presented in this Tanka poem definitely worthy of a contest place for sure Although not knowing the parameters of a Tanka I assume it fits the rules. lovely photo of two lovers.
dip
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Nah, you're just saying you aren't all too familiar with the tanka form or all of its idiosyncrasies and characteristics.
That's all.
Why, did she take it as offensive?
Comment from Heidi M
This is so sweet and sentimental! I really liked the reflective mood you created in this poem.
One minor suggestion: our days have (passed)
My favorite stanza was the second to the last. Well done.
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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This is so sweet and sentimental! I really liked the reflective mood you created in this poem.
One minor suggestion: our days have (passed)
My favorite stanza was the second to the last. Well done.
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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Thanks Heidi I always stuff up past and passed and when looking up their usuage in the dictionary I still find it confusing with their examples of each application Pass and pass are in the dictionary but for some reason passed is not and I don't understand why.
HE passed the ball
the years have passed
In other words the years have overtaken us it will always be a contentious issue
thanks for the great review
dip
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written heartfelt story. True love will always find its way back even when it takes years. It starts as an innocent child-like love and years later thrown together again at an old age home for the final stretch.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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A very well-written heartfelt story. True love will always find its way back even when it takes years. It starts as an innocent child-like love and years later thrown together again at an old age home for the final stretch.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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You've told the story as it is Sandra thankyou
dip