Man's Great Folly - Master Sonnet
Acrostic Sonnet for Climate Change Wreath44 total reviews
Comment from ProSongwriter
HI ...
I couldn't agree with you more! Man's greed for wealth and expansion has left so much of this great planet in a state of misery. We've not been very good stewards of this gift He gave us. We need to reevaluate how we treat it and do some mending.
Well done!
Alan
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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HI ...
I couldn't agree with you more! Man's greed for wealth and expansion has left so much of this great planet in a state of misery. We've not been very good stewards of this gift He gave us. We need to reevaluate how we treat it and do some mending.
Well done!
Alan
Comment Written 13-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Thanks, Alan.
'stewards' is a good word to use for how we ought to behave towards our planet....
Steve
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Steve, you are welcome...
Comment from LIJ Red
No reason I can see to change a thing about your master sonnet, which
lays down the theme for the climate change ensemble. I have yet to read the resolutions of that meeting of leaders on the topic. Excellent post.
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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No reason I can see to change a thing about your master sonnet, which
lays down the theme for the climate change ensemble. I have yet to read the resolutions of that meeting of leaders on the topic. Excellent post.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Thanks so much.
Let's look forward to seeing what the other sonneteers can make out of this template!
Steve
Comment from tfawcus
A worthy selection for the Master Sonnet. You leave plenty of scope for the individual sonnets in this series to follow different paths to the same end. The idea of guardianship germinated in the first stanza gives way in the second to the destructive pride we have in our human accomplishments and in the third the consequences of this are well illustrated. I thought that the last line had a touch of human arrogance in it, in the sense of our being able to return the gift of life to Nature. Our role is more one of nurturing it. We must maintain the gift. Congratulations on a fine sonnet written under demanding constraints.
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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A worthy selection for the Master Sonnet. You leave plenty of scope for the individual sonnets in this series to follow different paths to the same end. The idea of guardianship germinated in the first stanza gives way in the second to the destructive pride we have in our human accomplishments and in the third the consequences of this are well illustrated. I thought that the last line had a touch of human arrogance in it, in the sense of our being able to return the gift of life to Nature. Our role is more one of nurturing it. We must maintain the gift. Congratulations on a fine sonnet written under demanding constraints.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Thanks, Tony.
Yes, it was tough to get this flowing AND sensible AND fitting in the acrostic. The last line was the worst. I changed it from the original to make it more suited for the start of somebody else's sonnet - yours perhaps. No arrogance intended, although I take your point about nurturing/maintaining as opposed to 'giving life back to.'
I look forward to seeing what you other sonneteers can make out of this template!
Steve
Comment from nancy_e_davis
A very well written poem and a great entry for the contest Steve.
We do need to do what we can to save our planet and clean up our enviorment. I can't see it happening though. They can't quit fighting wars long enough to work together for any good reason. Good luck in the contest. Nancy
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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A very well written poem and a great entry for the contest Steve.
We do need to do what we can to save our planet and clean up our enviorment. I can't see it happening though. They can't quit fighting wars long enough to work together for any good reason. Good luck in the contest. Nancy
Comment Written 13-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Thanks, Nancy.
Yes, it's hard to see some countries changing, despite agreements and all the goodwill in the world...
Steve
Comment from Just2Write
Hi Steve: I added a couple of pumps on this one to get it a bit farther up the ladder. Hopefully, that will get it closer to the point where it will draw in a few more readers. You shouldn't have to bear the cost of promoting 2 Sonnets at the same time. Sorry - 2 is the best I can do. Rose.
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Congratulations on your win, Steve - Now you can sit back and relax a bit.
This is an excellent Master Sonnet, and I am looking forward to the next steps.
Your Acrostic message was the most powerful one and lends itself beautifully to this project.
Your lines make some very powerful statements:
Each generation takes, now all seems lost.
As climate alters, land and sea rebel.
I especially liked the statement of stanza 3:
The air grows thick, polluted by our waste.
For every tree we plant, a forest falls.
Our oceans choke on filth; man stands disgraced.
Like fools we bicker while your future palls.
Your closing couplet really drive the message home:
Let's make a change right now, repair the rift;
You gave us life - we must return your gift.
Amen. Earth gives us life, and we must return that favour.
Rose.
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Hi Steve: I added a couple of pumps on this one to get it a bit farther up the ladder. Hopefully, that will get it closer to the point where it will draw in a few more readers. You shouldn't have to bear the cost of promoting 2 Sonnets at the same time. Sorry - 2 is the best I can do. Rose.
.....
Congratulations on your win, Steve - Now you can sit back and relax a bit.
This is an excellent Master Sonnet, and I am looking forward to the next steps.
Your Acrostic message was the most powerful one and lends itself beautifully to this project.
Your lines make some very powerful statements:
Each generation takes, now all seems lost.
As climate alters, land and sea rebel.
I especially liked the statement of stanza 3:
The air grows thick, polluted by our waste.
For every tree we plant, a forest falls.
Our oceans choke on filth; man stands disgraced.
Like fools we bicker while your future palls.
Your closing couplet really drive the message home:
Let's make a change right now, repair the rift;
You gave us life - we must return your gift.
Amen. Earth gives us life, and we must return that favour.
Rose.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Rose, thanks a lot for the kind words and the six stars.
I look forward to seeing what you other sonneteers can make out of this template!
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Me too. <3
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Very nicely written as warning and promise all in the same.
This is the second I have read and I am impressed with both of them.
Rhyme was great and made it easy to read.
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Very nicely written as warning and promise all in the same.
This is the second I have read and I am impressed with both of them.
Rhyme was great and made it easy to read.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Thanks, barb. It's a great project.
Let's look forward to seeing what the other sonneteers can make out of this template!\Steve
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
What a great idea that is ... to make a Sonnet Wreath about Climate Change!
Your poem deservedly should make up part of this wreath, Steve.
This is an excellent poem that drives home to your reader the terrible damage that man is doing to our planet. Vivid imagery is created through your choice of words. Fave part, that pretty much says it all ... "Our oceans choke on filth; man stands disgraced. Like fools we bicker while our future palls."
Connie
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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What a great idea that is ... to make a Sonnet Wreath about Climate Change!
Your poem deservedly should make up part of this wreath, Steve.
This is an excellent poem that drives home to your reader the terrible damage that man is doing to our planet. Vivid imagery is created through your choice of words. Fave part, that pretty much says it all ... "Our oceans choke on filth; man stands disgraced. Like fools we bicker while our future palls."
Connie
Comment Written 13-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Thanks, Connie.
Let's look forward to seeing what the other sonneteers can make out of this template!
Steve
Comment from Zue65
The lines are quite smooth and flowed well from beginning to end. I am not much into rhymes and I am not an expert in metered poems, but I know if a poem's holding power is great enough to create an impact to the readers. And your poem did get my attention. Thanks for sharing an excellent write. All the best.
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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The lines are quite smooth and flowed well from beginning to end. I am not much into rhymes and I am not an expert in metered poems, but I know if a poem's holding power is great enough to create an impact to the readers. And your poem did get my attention. Thanks for sharing an excellent write. All the best.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Thank you - glad you enjoyed.
Steve
Comment from dragonpoet
Yes the world is a gift to us that we have failed to take care of. Your well written sonnet tells of our folly of polluting the air and deforestation to get the big houses and cars we don't really need.
This does seem like a big project. Good luck.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Yes the world is a gift to us that we have failed to take care of. Your well written sonnet tells of our folly of polluting the air and deforestation to get the big houses and cars we don't really need.
This does seem like a big project. Good luck.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
Comment Written 13-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Thank you.
Let's look forward to seeing what the other sonneteers can make out of this template!
Steve
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You're welcome, Steve.
Joan
Comment from Tomes Johnston
This is an interesting poem that the author has created with this piece of writing. We have to make the change before it is too late to save our home. It is the only one we have.
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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This is an interesting poem that the author has created with this piece of writing. We have to make the change before it is too late to save our home. It is the only one we have.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2015
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Thank you, Tomes.
Steve
