Sonnets
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 " First, With Words"A collection of sonnets
30 total reviews
Comment from giraffmang
Hi Mikey,
I don't really know what to say about this!
I loved it. the rhythm was superb and the imagery was very ripe. the words flowed and seeped into me as I read.
Simply fantastic. And kudos to Gloria, too.
One of the best pieces I have read all year.
All the best
G
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Hi Mikey,
I don't really know what to say about this!
I loved it. the rhythm was superb and the imagery was very ripe. the words flowed and seeped into me as I read.
Simply fantastic. And kudos to Gloria, too.
One of the best pieces I have read all year.
All the best
G
Comment Written 03-Dec-2015
Comment from lightink
That's... - okay, wait, I need to get back to my thinking mind. You know... turning on my intellect... Turning on... well! This is quite some writing and sure it conveys the action and the sentiment! It got me a bit speechless! Very powerful and sensual. The only word I wasn't certain about is the "salivating" yet, I found myself swallowing right after reading that exact word, so it's certainly very effective!
Good stuff!
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That's... - okay, wait, I need to get back to my thinking mind. You know... turning on my intellect... Turning on... well! This is quite some writing and sure it conveys the action and the sentiment! It got me a bit speechless! Very powerful and sensual. The only word I wasn't certain about is the "salivating" yet, I found myself swallowing right after reading that exact word, so it's certainly very effective!
Good stuff!
Comment Written 03-Dec-2015
Comment from Realist101
Hi Michael! This is neat. And makes an old gal wish for younger days too, that's for sure. I've read Brooke's work for years and I believe this to be very well written. I will check Gloria's as well...but sad that old age steals away the physical desires for so many. I do have some darn good memories however which this brought back. Oh for the dance floor. The music. That look. The life with wine and roses. OH well! :D
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Hi Michael! This is neat. And makes an old gal wish for younger days too, that's for sure. I've read Brooke's work for years and I believe this to be very well written. I will check Gloria's as well...but sad that old age steals away the physical desires for so many. I do have some darn good memories however which this brought back. Oh for the dance floor. The music. That look. The life with wine and roses. OH well! :D
Comment Written 03-Dec-2015
Comment from reconciled
woe woe woe ...hold on their tiger...-hands up- this is all still really new to me...gently does a gentleman pursue Mikey....woo my I'm flush with flutter i'm afraid....i just need a lil time. oh and thank you so much Gloria. Could you shut the door on your way out....ah haha. Okay...seriously...this is Victoria's secret exposed. pure adrenalin...the good stiff stuff. well done Mr.Juan. platonic love and water... michael
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woe woe woe ...hold on their tiger...-hands up- this is all still really new to me...gently does a gentleman pursue Mikey....woo my I'm flush with flutter i'm afraid....i just need a lil time. oh and thank you so much Gloria. Could you shut the door on your way out....ah haha. Okay...seriously...this is Victoria's secret exposed. pure adrenalin...the good stiff stuff. well done Mr.Juan. platonic love and water... michael
Comment Written 03-Dec-2015
Comment from nordicgirl
This is one of the best things I have read anywhere in a long time. I see the challenges of form and certainly guve kudos for your mastery of them. No small feat in and of itself. This goes far beyond that. This sizzles with true emotion and love. Perfect descriptors throughout. This is perfection. Stunning and without peer.
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This is one of the best things I have read anywhere in a long time. I see the challenges of form and certainly guve kudos for your mastery of them. No small feat in and of itself. This goes far beyond that. This sizzles with true emotion and love. Perfect descriptors throughout. This is perfection. Stunning and without peer.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2015
Comment from BOO ghost
Most pleasurable poem with a cocktail of intriguing twisted words of wisdom and feelings.Super looking presentation, very nicely crafted Lion King. Appreciate the author notes. Yep, I'm completely lost with this variation of poetry. 'tis is educational, we can learn something new everyday, I see... surely looks complicated, i read the author notes but you seemingly slayed the dragon. Nice originality and imagination was put forth to create this unique poem. BOO
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Most pleasurable poem with a cocktail of intriguing twisted words of wisdom and feelings.Super looking presentation, very nicely crafted Lion King. Appreciate the author notes. Yep, I'm completely lost with this variation of poetry. 'tis is educational, we can learn something new everyday, I see... surely looks complicated, i read the author notes but you seemingly slayed the dragon. Nice originality and imagination was put forth to create this unique poem. BOO
Comment Written 03-Dec-2015
Comment from Teri7
I truly enjoyed reading this type of poem. You used very good descriptive wording and the art work went well with it. It was a joy to read and review. Great job my friend. Hugs, Teri
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I truly enjoyed reading this type of poem. You used very good descriptive wording and the art work went well with it. It was a joy to read and review. Great job my friend. Hugs, Teri
Comment Written 03-Dec-2015
Comment from Gloria ....
Mikey this is so sexy and sweet at the same time. I doubt anyone could question your front line rhymes and of the course the end line rhymes are a given. I always like to take the first word of certain lines from poems and construct what I refer to as the terminal method for finding the truth.
Here I read, Quill, will trust, splash, slide and ride to ecstasy? That is quite a statement posed by the universe..and my guess is, the answer is a nod of approval.
What I most enjoy about the Lento form is starting with a spondee? (I hope someone who knows more about poetry than I do will tell me if this is correct) in combination with a couple of dactyls. So, that spices up the sing songy effect of a sonnet. So while the first three words are all stressed syllables the centre one must be a stronger stress than the two surrounding it. Your poetry has risen a notch or three. Ahem ...
This is just absolutely beautiful, sweet and gentle like you.
Love it and you. And kudos to you for taking a jump into the poetic primordial stew. :))
Gloria
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Mikey this is so sexy and sweet at the same time. I doubt anyone could question your front line rhymes and of the course the end line rhymes are a given. I always like to take the first word of certain lines from poems and construct what I refer to as the terminal method for finding the truth.
Here I read, Quill, will trust, splash, slide and ride to ecstasy? That is quite a statement posed by the universe..and my guess is, the answer is a nod of approval.
What I most enjoy about the Lento form is starting with a spondee? (I hope someone who knows more about poetry than I do will tell me if this is correct) in combination with a couple of dactyls. So, that spices up the sing songy effect of a sonnet. So while the first three words are all stressed syllables the centre one must be a stronger stress than the two surrounding it. Your poetry has risen a notch or three. Ahem ...
This is just absolutely beautiful, sweet and gentle like you.
Love it and you. And kudos to you for taking a jump into the poetic primordial stew. :))
Gloria
Comment Written 03-Dec-2015
Comment from Zue65
I am not really into rhymes and I don't look for it when reviewing poems, except of course in very short verses popularized by Japan where the syllable count is really restrictive. But in poems longer than four lines, I simply read and allow the lines to wash over me. If it did, as I savor the message, then it is an excellent piece for me. I don't care about the abab, aabb rhyme pattern, the vessel don't matter much, it is the content not the form that makes a poem. I enjoyed your poem irrespective of the rhythm. This is an excellent write. God bless.
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I am not really into rhymes and I don't look for it when reviewing poems, except of course in very short verses popularized by Japan where the syllable count is really restrictive. But in poems longer than four lines, I simply read and allow the lines to wash over me. If it did, as I savor the message, then it is an excellent piece for me. I don't care about the abab, aabb rhyme pattern, the vessel don't matter much, it is the content not the form that makes a poem. I enjoyed your poem irrespective of the rhythm. This is an excellent write. God bless.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2015
Comment from I am Cat
Jeez Mikey, there aren't enough batteries in the house for this one.
What the hell is going on around here.
I can see where Gloria's might have sparked this... but there was
absolutely nothing in Brooke's Lento that sparked THIS. NOPE.
NUH-UH. NO WAY.
*shakes head*
It's Gloria...
splash/crash/smash/thrash? slide/abide/tide/ride
penetrate?undulate?salivate? antici................pate?
uhhuh...
yeah...
ok, time for bed now.
wow.
Love the starting and ending rhymes.. you just set this (what I considered a VERY boring form) on its ass. This rocks the Casbah...
I'm only disappointed that I don't have a sex (ahem) six to give it.
;)
beautifully done.
A virtual... because... that's virtually all I'm getting from this angle. LOLOL
Well done.
I bow to your greatness.
C
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
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Jeez Mikey, there aren't enough batteries in the house for this one.
What the hell is going on around here.
I can see where Gloria's might have sparked this... but there was
absolutely nothing in Brooke's Lento that sparked THIS. NOPE.
NUH-UH. NO WAY.
*shakes head*
It's Gloria...
splash/crash/smash/thrash? slide/abide/tide/ride
penetrate?undulate?salivate? antici................pate?
uhhuh...
yeah...
ok, time for bed now.
wow.
Love the starting and ending rhymes.. you just set this (what I considered a VERY boring form) on its ass. This rocks the Casbah...
I'm only disappointed that I don't have a sex (ahem) six to give it.
;)
beautifully done.
A virtual... because... that's virtually all I'm getting from this angle. LOLOL
Well done.
I bow to your greatness.
C
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2015
