Act of Endurance
Viewing comments for Chapter 75 "The Thought of I"Dawn of Chaos
28 total reviews
Comment from nancyrabbrose
You have written an interesting and very deep-in-thought poem. I think I understand that in the end of your search you (the poet) realize that the only one we can know is ourselves and that is enough.
A few corrections:
change tongue bleed to tongue bled
haven --? do you mean haven't or have?
Good work. And it seems as if it was hard work.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2015
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You have written an interesting and very deep-in-thought poem. I think I understand that in the end of your search you (the poet) realize that the only one we can know is ourselves and that is enough.
A few corrections:
change tongue bleed to tongue bled
haven --? do you mean haven't or have?
Good work. And it seems as if it was hard work.
Comment Written 26-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2015
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Thanking you for the pit check and as for write trying but not really hard. Good look out. Appreciating generous rate and inspiring thoughts.
Comment from rjuselius
This is a brilliant philosophical sentiment dear tpac! Your words have a true impact and impression on the reader and your soul-searching is eminent domain.
Thank you for sharing!
Blessings!
Rebekka x
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2015
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This is a brilliant philosophical sentiment dear tpac! Your words have a true impact and impression on the reader and your soul-searching is eminent domain.
Thank you for sharing!
Blessings!
Rebekka x
Comment Written 26-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2015
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Thanking you for generous rate and inspiring thoughts about this write. Glad this work found appeal.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A long road to go with yourself, it ends well when you discovered only you can know who you really are and that is what matters the most.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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A long road to go with yourself, it ends well when you discovered only you can know who you really are and that is what matters the most.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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Indeed. The message to be received and captured in your conveyance. Thanking you for generous rate and comforting thoughts.
Comment from Patricia Dsouza
Your writing is remarkable and refined. I value the way you progress and flow throughout. You have remarkably brilliant skills.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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Your writing is remarkable and refined. I value the way you progress and flow throughout. You have remarkably brilliant skills.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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Thanking you for your comments about this work. I find your thoughts appealing in interests. Thanking you for your generous rate and pleasing comments.
Comment from poetsteve15
If you learned that then you have scudded in the most important thing in your life. Finding yourself...
A great poem you keep me in it till the end of it, that is hard to do with long poem. keep up good work
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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If you learned that then you have scudded in the most important thing in your life. Finding yourself...
A great poem you keep me in it till the end of it, that is hard to do with long poem. keep up good work
Comment Written 26-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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Glad the journey was interesting to you. Thanking you for generous rate and welcomed comments.
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Your very welcome
Comment from Leineco
This is an interesting "inner monologue" poem" - deeply introspective and brutally honest. The reader must pause on a regular basis to contemplate the arc of this life.
I particularly liked
I would not be a sheep trapped.
I wouldn't compromise righteous equation,
placing myself in false comforts,
- a howl of defiance
I would like to recommend a few edits
- life have standards, (have should be either has or had)
- life rough rigid course (life should be life's [possessive])
- walked city darken streets (you might want to rearrange this to walked darkened city streets)
- I heard past ancestors
anger in the thunder, (in context, ancestors should be ancestor's [possessive])
- I crossed hell river (I'm pretty sure you meant this to be hell's [possessive] river
:-) Just a few thoughts to consider :-)
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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This is an interesting "inner monologue" poem" - deeply introspective and brutally honest. The reader must pause on a regular basis to contemplate the arc of this life.
I particularly liked
I would not be a sheep trapped.
I wouldn't compromise righteous equation,
placing myself in false comforts,
- a howl of defiance
I would like to recommend a few edits
- life have standards, (have should be either has or had)
- life rough rigid course (life should be life's [possessive])
- walked city darken streets (you might want to rearrange this to walked darkened city streets)
- I heard past ancestors
anger in the thunder, (in context, ancestors should be ancestor's [possessive])
- I crossed hell river (I'm pretty sure you meant this to be hell's [possessive] river
:-) Just a few thoughts to consider :-)
Comment Written 26-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2015
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I salute you thanking you for insights and appreciated comments of corrections will revise also for generous rate.
Comment from petalangela
Oh wow just wow to say too much more would detract from that wow factor you have created here.
Education is an empty barrel it causes class distinction and it divides and humanity it hides
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2015
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Oh wow just wow to say too much more would detract from that wow factor you have created here.
Education is an empty barrel it causes class distinction and it divides and humanity it hides
Comment Written 15-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2015
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Thanking you for generous rate and captivating thoughts about this work. Always a pleasure to be smiled upon by such a talented writer.
Comment from anabellapongasi
Very profound thoughts compiled here after a long and winding journey of soul- searching. Very well expressed in this poetic piece.
Beautiful and enjoyable read. I like how you wrapped it all up in the excellent closing lines:
"I come to end in full circle all my journeys tried.
I knowing no more about myself: than, I."
Great job on this free verse.
Blessings,
Anabella
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reply by the author on 16-Aug-2015
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Very profound thoughts compiled here after a long and winding journey of soul- searching. Very well expressed in this poetic piece.
Beautiful and enjoyable read. I like how you wrapped it all up in the excellent closing lines:
"I come to end in full circle all my journeys tried.
I knowing no more about myself: than, I."
Great job on this free verse.
Blessings,
Anabella
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2015
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Thanking you for your encouragement and generous rate with comforting comments.