2015 Haiku
Viewing comments for Chapter 57 "haiku ( happy hummingbird )"A collection of haiku I wrote in 2015
34 total reviews
Comment from CMac2
I love your picture you have with your poem. It has reminded me that although the world can sometimes be lonely, it is also beautiful and beauty can be found everywhere.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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I love your picture you have with your poem. It has reminded me that although the world can sometimes be lonely, it is also beautiful and beauty can be found everywhere.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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thank you cmac I appreciate your review
Comment from Joan E.
I relished this piece about your namesake. The image of the hummingbirds intensified the scene and your thought-provoking satori was compelling. Best wishes in the contest- Joan
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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I relished this piece about your namesake. The image of the hummingbirds intensified the scene and your thought-provoking satori was compelling. Best wishes in the contest- Joan
Comment Written 11-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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thank you joanI appreciate your review
Comment from Benjamin Valencia
Hello. You have a nice image, but I'm not exactly sure how and why this particular plant would attract hummingbirds and what hummingbirds had anything to do with your haiku. "It's a lonely world" yes but I still couldn't find the connection of all these lines.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Hello. You have a nice image, but I'm not exactly sure how and why this particular plant would attract hummingbirds and what hummingbirds had anything to do with your haiku. "It's a lonely world" yes but I still couldn't find the connection of all these lines.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Comment from mermaids
Love the image of the blue rose and the hummingbirds. Excellent use of words that gives the reader a good feeling. I like the use of the dash in the second line, it adds to the strength of the poem.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Love the image of the blue rose and the hummingbirds. Excellent use of words that gives the reader a good feeling. I like the use of the dash in the second line, it adds to the strength of the poem.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Thank you very much, I really appreciate your review.
Comment from cbat
hummingbirds and blueroses, how could this possay go wrong.
Your choice of art and words simple beautiful and uplifting.
I enjoyed this.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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hummingbirds and blueroses, how could this possay go wrong.
Your choice of art and words simple beautiful and uplifting.
I enjoyed this.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Thank you very much cbat, I really appreciate your review.
Comment from Eternal Muse
I adore the artistic presentation and the blue motiff, the language is rich and full of imagery.
However, I don't see two interconnecting lines, all three seem to stand on their own, in contradiction to the contest rules.
I wanted to bring it to your attention.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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I adore the artistic presentation and the blue motiff, the language is rich and full of imagery.
However, I don't see two interconnecting lines, all three seem to stand on their own, in contradiction to the contest rules.
I wanted to bring it to your attention.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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kiss the rose is the connection, sorry you missed it
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I just popped in again - I love new version. Appeals to me a lot more than "kiss the rose'. You have perfect interconnecting lines of concrete imagery and a handsome satori. Good luck in the contest.
Comment from skye
kiss the sweet blue rose
longed-for happy hummingbirds
it's a lonely world
There are not 2 interconnected thoughts in my reading.
Suggestion --
kiss the sweet blue rose
as I long for hummingbirds
it's a lonely world.
Well done.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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kiss the sweet blue rose
longed-for happy hummingbirds
it's a lonely world
There are not 2 interconnected thoughts in my reading.
Suggestion --
kiss the sweet blue rose
as I long for hummingbirds
it's a lonely world.
Well done.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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kiss the sweet blue rose longed-for hummingbird (hummingbird kiss the rose) they are connected. A satori line is not a continuation of a sentence, it is suppose to make the reader think and observe an mental picture
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Thanks for the clarification. I have revised my rating. Great.
Comment from misscookie
I like the artwork you choose for your poem
you captured my attention from the star. There is a message within your poem.
Thank you for sharing.
Cookie
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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I like the artwork you choose for your poem
you captured my attention from the star. There is a message within your poem.
Thank you for sharing.
Cookie
Comment Written 11-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Thank you Miss Cookie, I appreciate your review very much. :)
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You're very welcome, until next time.
Cookie
Comment from Brett Matthew West
As this well written haiku says you better take advantage of the little things in life while and when you can before it is too late to enjoy them and end up in a lonely world. Should also be a good contest entry. Well done.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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As this well written haiku says you better take advantage of the little things in life while and when you can before it is too late to enjoy them and end up in a lonely world. Should also be a good contest entry. Well done.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Thank you Brett, I appreciate your excellent review.
Comment from Ben Colder
I saw this and thought of the white roses blooming in our garden. Blue, they are beautiful as well. Good contest piece. Thanks for sharing. Hope you win.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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I saw this and thought of the white roses blooming in our garden. Blue, they are beautiful as well. Good contest piece. Thanks for sharing. Hope you win.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Thank you Ben, I appreciate your excellent review.