Comment from vapros

Excellent

There is good craftsmanship in each individual verse of this song. A girl named Alice joins readers in the second verse, and reappears at the end. In between, scattered concepts are explored; plaintive and mournful and hopeless. As I said, the various verses are entertaining. Good work.

v

 Comment Written 15-Jul-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jul-2014

Thank you very much for your review. I appreciate your comments. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Some people don't seem to understand what I am saying.

Comment from Kashif Ali Abbas

Excellent

The artwork is inspiring, for the start. The poem has flow and nice imagery. The style is very well poised.
Hope often leaves me
In dreams I've been lost
I hope she knows I love her
I pray that she can see
I hope that she can see [ my pick]

K

 Comment Written 15-Jul-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jul-2014

Thank you very much for taking the time to read and review my poem. I appreciate your comments and I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Comment from Dawny53

Excellent

I thought that by repeating your last lines in each stanza you gave this poem a certain melody, almost turning it into really great lyrics for a song. Beautifully written and I keep coming back to it!

 Comment Written 15-Jul-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jul-2014

Thank you very much for your comments. This did actually start life as a song. It always seems to have a certain rhythm in my head when I read it. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Comment from Msmasero

Good

Picture used is good. Presentation is very good. This is one of the few good poems I have read. I like the repetition you just did on every paragraph.I am also hoping with you that she knows she is loved.

 Comment Written 15-Jul-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jul-2014

Thank you for taking the time to read my poem and for your comments. Was there something you thought needed improving?

Comment from Nosha17

Excellent

Love is a difficult thing to get one's head round. We are never quite sure and it all plays tricks with our minds. Well chosen words and rhyming to convey your sincere message of love. Enjoyable read. Faye

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jul-2014

Thank you for your comments. I appreciate your time.

Comment from gazzagodbod

Excellent

wow great work here the hard hitting picture is perfect for the piece and your words are fabulous well done my friend xxgazzagodbodxxx

 Comment Written 14-Jul-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jul-2014

Thank you very much for taking the time to read and review my poem. I appreciate your comments.

Comment from kiwijenny

Excellent

Intriguing read ...I like the repeat refrains...I think the art is a great fit...it left me feeling sad....at how we people tie ourselves up in knots emotionally mentally...well written
God bless

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 Comment Written 14-Jul-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jul-2014

Thank you very much for your reading and reviewing this. I appreciate your comments.