To My Part's Content
Happy Funday30 total reviews
Comment from Donya Quijote
It's not even Friday! What a treat! Old innocent Ines here is laughing silly at this fun rhyming poem, rhyming with internally and at the end too. What a knack you have for alliteration. What a word cumbrous is! It's nice to have you back regale us with lusty adventures. These lines made me laugh out loud: He arms, and loads, and then explodes, Rejoice or bitch, no matter which, Your beauty, lust, and bouncy bust. Still laughing. Welcome back!!!
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2014
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It's not even Friday! What a treat! Old innocent Ines here is laughing silly at this fun rhyming poem, rhyming with internally and at the end too. What a knack you have for alliteration. What a word cumbrous is! It's nice to have you back regale us with lusty adventures. These lines made me laugh out loud: He arms, and loads, and then explodes, Rejoice or bitch, no matter which, Your beauty, lust, and bouncy bust. Still laughing. Welcome back!!!
Comment Written 28-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2014
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Thanks so much, DQ, for your sixer, and your great review. So glad you liked it. It was a quickie, of sorts, but they're always fun to compose.
Comment from Kenneth Schaal
Welcome back David. I miss the demands and boastful verse of your Id, 'The Rogue,' but I truly missed the metrical verses, and reviews. Hope you'll be around a while. Kenny
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Welcome back David. I miss the demands and boastful verse of your Id, 'The Rogue,' but I truly missed the metrical verses, and reviews. Hope you'll be around a while. Kenny
Comment Written 28-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Thank you, Kenny. I wasn't expecting to post today, but glad I did. I don't think I'll be a daily contributor, but I do want to reinsert myself (heh-heh) into the consciousness of the place again.
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I believe this post will serve as a prominent entry.
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:) I missed you, brother. Thanks!
Comment from padumachitta
Hi. The poem as always is witty, dirtily funny and well written. I am so glad to see you back.
Seriously, I was concerned. You disappeared. I am a writer...I pictured you in a coma or something.
Anyway it sounds like life is busy for you.
I am just glad to know you breathe.
padumachitta
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Hi. The poem as always is witty, dirtily funny and well written. I am so glad to see you back.
Seriously, I was concerned. You disappeared. I am a writer...I pictured you in a coma or something.
Anyway it sounds like life is busy for you.
I am just glad to know you breathe.
padumachitta
Comment Written 28-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Thanks so much, Pad. Life is extremely busy right now, but I needed this today so I fired this poem up at lunch. It was fun to write again. More to come!
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Hi. I'm just glad you're safe...fire away:-)
padumachitta
Comment from Julia.
Haha. I've missed your writing, although I haven't been around much either the last couple of months. I may have to write a response to this when I get the time. Hope everything is going well with you. :)
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Haha. I've missed your writing, although I haven't been around much either the last couple of months. I may have to write a response to this when I get the time. Hope everything is going well with you. :)
Comment Written 28-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Thanks so much, my friend. It was fun to dip my pen back in the well again. It feels good. ;)
Feel free to write a response. I'm just getting warmed up, and I consider the responses foreplay.
Comment from comanalbert
Well, certainly who invented the inner rhyme didn't think it will be so good used and for such...heavenly purposes. I guess if the ladies have woken the monster, they have to take it all in, so to say. Better yet, don't play with the fire if you don't know how to be burned good!
Wonderful, keep it going, whatever is preocupping you out there ( I sense it is a serious lot), your strength is gathered from in here...
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Well, certainly who invented the inner rhyme didn't think it will be so good used and for such...heavenly purposes. I guess if the ladies have woken the monster, they have to take it all in, so to say. Better yet, don't play with the fire if you don't know how to be burned good!
Wonderful, keep it going, whatever is preocupping you out there ( I sense it is a serious lot), your strength is gathered from in here...
Comment Written 28-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Thanks so much, my friend. Yes, my time away is for a solemn reason, but since a guy has to have some fun...what better place than here. I appreciate that sixer, brother.
Comment from rama devi
Another outstanding romp with the rogue's witty pen (pen... is!)
Excellent and creative internal rhyme and rhyme. Flawless meter and flow. Funny pun-ny metaphors (ink, grow head, etc)
Clever internal rhymes here:
He arms, and loads, and then explodes
The shot your hotness bred.
Fine alliteration of B and rhythm...)
Your beauty, lust, and bouncy bust
Bring rhythm to his rhyme,
So every stroke and swirl and poke (great line and rhymes)
Arrives in perfect time.
Good closing stanza!
Rejoice or bitch, no matter which, (LOL! Clever rhyme.)
But be forewarned, the scoundrel scorned (great rhyme and alliteration)
Fun closing line:
Is not deceased -- he's near.
Glad to see you posting again, David. You've been missed.
Smiles,
rd
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reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Another outstanding romp with the rogue's witty pen (pen... is!)
Excellent and creative internal rhyme and rhyme. Flawless meter and flow. Funny pun-ny metaphors (ink, grow head, etc)
Clever internal rhymes here:
He arms, and loads, and then explodes
The shot your hotness bred.
Fine alliteration of B and rhythm...)
Your beauty, lust, and bouncy bust
Bring rhythm to his rhyme,
So every stroke and swirl and poke (great line and rhymes)
Arrives in perfect time.
Good closing stanza!
Rejoice or bitch, no matter which, (LOL! Clever rhyme.)
But be forewarned, the scoundrel scorned (great rhyme and alliteration)
Fun closing line:
Is not deceased -- he's near.
Glad to see you posting again, David. You've been missed.
Smiles,
rd
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Comment Written 28-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Thank you, my friend. It hit me at lunch that I really missed the process, so I dashed this one off. Felt good to do so, and to see your wonderful thoughts, as always.
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:-)
Comment from Domino 2
Great to see you back, David, and I hope all is well.
You sure haven't lost your touch, in fact this is one of your smoothest (though you meter is always tops) I've read.
Maybe it's the apparently effortless alliteration, but not overdone to become irritating that adds to the flow even more, and also the top enjambment throughout which I think would be even smoother without the CAPS to start every line where a sentence continues. For example, I stuttered on:He arms, and loads, and then explodes
The shot your hotness bred.', as I thought it was two sentences before reading it again.
'to fill his throbbing head' could be ambiguous to refer to his 'bell-end' that 'modestly, LOL, 'dwarfs all other men'.
I wouldn't say this is strong enough to 'hide', and I'm sure a 'strong sexual content' warning would suffice - though maybe not interest some so much to check it out. :-)
Here's a deserved sixer, my very talented friend.
Cheers, Ted
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Great to see you back, David, and I hope all is well.
You sure haven't lost your touch, in fact this is one of your smoothest (though you meter is always tops) I've read.
Maybe it's the apparently effortless alliteration, but not overdone to become irritating that adds to the flow even more, and also the top enjambment throughout which I think would be even smoother without the CAPS to start every line where a sentence continues. For example, I stuttered on:He arms, and loads, and then explodes
The shot your hotness bred.', as I thought it was two sentences before reading it again.
'to fill his throbbing head' could be ambiguous to refer to his 'bell-end' that 'modestly, LOL, 'dwarfs all other men'.
I wouldn't say this is strong enough to 'hide', and I'm sure a 'strong sexual content' warning would suffice - though maybe not interest some so much to check it out. :-)
Here's a deserved sixer, my very talented friend.
Cheers, Ted
Comment Written 28-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Thanks so much, Ted, for your great review. This one was really just a quick verse, so I'm really glad you liked it. I go back and forth on the caps thing, but definitely see what you mean. I appreciate that sixer, my friend.
Comment from adewpearl
great use of abcb rhyming and enjambment and iambic meter
what can I say about the alliteration in cumbrous crotch, let alone the visual? LOL
good internal rhyme in muse he'll choose to use and in bitch/which and forewarned/scorned
I'm laughing my head off at the alliterative bouncy bust bring
Well, thank the Lord you're not deceased. There would be drooling women jumping off bridges. LOL :-) Brooke
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reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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great use of abcb rhyming and enjambment and iambic meter
what can I say about the alliteration in cumbrous crotch, let alone the visual? LOL
good internal rhyme in muse he'll choose to use and in bitch/which and forewarned/scorned
I'm laughing my head off at the alliterative bouncy bust bring
Well, thank the Lord you're not deceased. There would be drooling women jumping off bridges. LOL :-) Brooke
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Comment Written 28-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Too kind, my friend. Thanks, Brooke, for stopping by and having a look. I KNEW you liked to watch! ;)
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Visualizing cumbrous crotches growing - what is left when George Clooney has been taken off the market? ;-)
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The rogue has always known to strike while his iron is hot, so the timing of his return may or may not be accidental. ;) Thanks, Brooke, for the smile. You never disappoint.
Comment from 24chas
I see the rogue has dragged himself back to the keyboard for something other than researching new positions. Nice to read you again. Excellent rhythm and flow. And I'm sure you hear that all the time from your, er, fans.
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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I see the rogue has dragged himself back to the keyboard for something other than researching new positions. Nice to read you again. Excellent rhythm and flow. And I'm sure you hear that all the time from your, er, fans.
Comment Written 28-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Thanks, bro. It had been too long...like the rogue. ;)
Comment from donaldcolson
I don't have any info about the rogue idea nor do I understand the references to bitches but so far as the poetry goes this is an excellent piece of work. don
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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I don't have any info about the rogue idea nor do I understand the references to bitches but so far as the poetry goes this is an excellent piece of work. don
Comment Written 28-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Thank you very much, Don. It's all in good fun with some of the ladies here. I probably should have included that in the author notes, since it's been awhile. I appreciate it!
David