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Viewing comments for Chapter 75 "Wombs"Shorter stories
24 total reviews
Comment from adewpearl
You set the stage dramatically in your opening paragraphs
to scan novels and to have memories based on a memory donation - what a horrible way to enjoy life
and to bypass actual food to have vitamins and nutrients just injected and then be tricked into a feeling of fullness - this certainly is not a future for those of us who enjoy the truly human experience
You definitely fulfill the command of the prompt to write about a bad future - I love all the detail and the clever premise of your story :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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You set the stage dramatically in your opening paragraphs
to scan novels and to have memories based on a memory donation - what a horrible way to enjoy life
and to bypass actual food to have vitamins and nutrients just injected and then be tricked into a feeling of fullness - this certainly is not a future for those of us who enjoy the truly human experience
You definitely fulfill the command of the prompt to write about a bad future - I love all the detail and the clever premise of your story :-) Brooke
Comment Written 17-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Thank you for reviewing this Brooke. I appreciate it more than you might imagine. The reviews have been fairly shallow and dismissive for this story. I truly cherish your perceptive analysis. Bill
Comment from Misrael
I almost did not finish this as it was boring for one and two it was so impersonal and clinical. Not to mention inhuman. The only thing that kept me going was that I wanted to see how it would end. In spite of everything I would like to say keep on writing.
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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I almost did not finish this as it was boring for one and two it was so impersonal and clinical. Not to mention inhuman. The only thing that kept me going was that I wanted to see how it would end. In spite of everything I would like to say keep on writing.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Thank you for reviewing and not letting the rating follow your apparent distain. It was intended to be cold and repetitive, as is the expected dystopian monotony.
Comment from Torrence Winter
Very descriptive and interesting. I found that it repeated itself. Could not quite figure out of the wombs were attached to real people or if they were just the lower halves. The repetitiveness showed how boring a life was. I take it that this is simulated? That the people never actually go anywhere?
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reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Very descriptive and interesting. I found that it repeated itself. Could not quite figure out of the wombs were attached to real people or if they were just the lower halves. The repetitiveness showed how boring a life was. I take it that this is simulated? That the people never actually go anywhere?
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Yes, the implication is that their lives are implanted and they are kept content to drone on.
Comment from whispersofthesoul
hiya
this is a complicated story, you are not telling the reader what happens to the child, it put in a tube and gone, again with the 'mother' what happens to her.
you also are just repeating the same process on the delivery on numerous occassions and the same with the abortion.
you also do exactly the same at the end of the week winning the million dollars.
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reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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hiya
this is a complicated story, you are not telling the reader what happens to the child, it put in a tube and gone, again with the 'mother' what happens to her.
you also are just repeating the same process on the delivery on numerous occassions and the same with the abortion.
you also do exactly the same at the end of the week winning the million dollars.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Yes. The implication is that it is all implanted information. People drone on feeling like they're living life, when they are actually being made to think they are. This requires a little three-dimensional thinking. Thanks for your review.