Fourth of July
An Acrostic poem38 total reviews
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Yes you have expressed your feelings strongly in this acrostic showing how proud you are to be American which is very well presented well done good luck regards Jill
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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Yes you have expressed your feelings strongly in this acrostic showing how proud you are to be American which is very well presented well done good luck regards Jill
Comment Written 20-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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Thank you so much! Like I said, I wouldn't want to live anywhere else. I appreciate you reading it and I'm happy you liked it! Thank you also for the good luck wish!
Comment from rjuselius
this is a nice tribute to the united states and freedom.
the whole european mess is sizzling like bacon in a hot stove.
thank you for sharing!
goodl uck in the contest!
rebekka x
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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this is a nice tribute to the united states and freedom.
the whole european mess is sizzling like bacon in a hot stove.
thank you for sharing!
goodl uck in the contest!
rebekka x
Comment Written 20-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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Thank you!! I agree about the mess in Europe. Don't want to live anywhere but U.S. Thank you for reading it and the good luck wish!
Comment from Glasstruth
Very patriotic in every way. Starting with the picture and the color red shows that we've fought for we have, and a yearly celebration is always well founded in our freedom. Love the rhyming and flow. Superb! Les
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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Very patriotic in every way. Starting with the picture and the color red shows that we've fought for we have, and a yearly celebration is always well founded in our freedom. Love the rhyming and flow. Superb! Les
Comment Written 20-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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Thank you, Les! This means so much to me. I'm so glad you liked the rhyming and flow. Just about pulled my hair out trying to get it right.haha Thank you for reading it!!
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, suzie q, you did an excellent job writing this acrostic poem about the freedom we have in the united states that we shouldn't take for granted. good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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this is very well written, suzie q, you did an excellent job writing this acrostic poem about the freedom we have in the united states that we shouldn't take for granted. good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 20-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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Thank you so much! It being an Acrostic made it a little trickier to write but your review made it worth it. Thank you again!
Comment from Gungalo
A very patriotic write that relies on Jesus to pull it through. It is so true too. Wonderful write and I hope everyone got to see it.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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A very patriotic write that relies on Jesus to pull it through. It is so true too. Wonderful write and I hope everyone got to see it.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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Thank you so much! Yea, I had to do the last stanza as a prayer to Him. Won't make it without Him. Thank you so much for your sweet review!
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My pleasure.
Comment from Opal H.
This is such a well written acrostic, like the letter restrictions hardly mattered. Really well done. Great work and good luck.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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This is such a well written acrostic, like the letter restrictions hardly mattered. Really well done. Great work and good luck.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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Thank you so much! I got frustrated a little because I could think of different ways to express myself but I had to change it to make it work as an Acrostic. You've made me glad I did. Thank you again!!
Comment from Helvidius
This is a beautiful acrostic poem. The rhyme is perfect. I just find it a little sad. I used to feel this same way. I served my country for four years in the Air Force in Japan in the late 80s. I loved my country. But somewhere along the way it was hijacked.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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This is a beautiful acrostic poem. The rhyme is perfect. I just find it a little sad. I used to feel this same way. I served my country for four years in the Air Force in Japan in the late 80s. I loved my country. But somewhere along the way it was hijacked.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
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Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked the rhyme. I'm so sorry for your situation. Wish I could help, but you're definitely in my prayers. Hey, you never know.... Thanks again!
Comment from cabinwriter
I heartily agree with the sentiments in your wonderfully patriotic poem, as well as your author notes. The poem read very smoothly and easily with your choice of words, meter and rhyme.
Thank you for sharing your love of country with me!
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2012
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I heartily agree with the sentiments in your wonderfully patriotic poem, as well as your author notes. The poem read very smoothly and easily with your choice of words, meter and rhyme.
Thank you for sharing your love of country with me!
Comment Written 19-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2012
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Thank you so much! I appreciate you reading it and thrilled that you liked it. Thank you again!
Comment from gifted$1
Nice, patriot acrostic. These aren't easy to write. I just posted one yesterday, and for me, they just have to show up because am not that 'gifted'. I like this so much in how you honor our country and also place it where it belongs..in the Lord's hands. We sure need Him more than ever right about now. Great entry.
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2012
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Nice, patriot acrostic. These aren't easy to write. I just posted one yesterday, and for me, they just have to show up because am not that 'gifted'. I like this so much in how you honor our country and also place it where it belongs..in the Lord's hands. We sure need Him more than ever right about now. Great entry.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2012
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God bless you! Hey, if I can write one, anyone can! Yes, we sure need the Lord's help right now and I'm sure He will. Thank you again!
Comment from Cornelius2000
A very nice tribute to our flag and our Country. However, I find your meter erratic so that the poem doesn't read smoothly. The first two lines are perfect, and establish a rhythm for the poem. But the third line has two many syllables at the beginning and is missing one in the middle of the line so that one has to pause before continuing. A third line that would keep the rhythm going would be:
"United we stand with you, you're our faithful, loyal friend."
The 5th line could be "Treas'ring every precious stripe, protecting every star."
Line 8: "Freedom broke the binding chains, and dried the tears we cried."
I hope it doesn't seem too presumtuous of me to rewrite of your lines, but I thought it was the best way to illustrate what I think is needed to keep the rhythm of the poem going. Hope this is of some help.
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reply by the author on 19-Jul-2012
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A very nice tribute to our flag and our Country. However, I find your meter erratic so that the poem doesn't read smoothly. The first two lines are perfect, and establish a rhythm for the poem. But the third line has two many syllables at the beginning and is missing one in the middle of the line so that one has to pause before continuing. A third line that would keep the rhythm going would be:
"United we stand with you, you're our faithful, loyal friend."
The 5th line could be "Treas'ring every precious stripe, protecting every star."
Line 8: "Freedom broke the binding chains, and dried the tears we cried."
I hope it doesn't seem too presumtuous of me to rewrite of your lines, but I thought it was the best way to illustrate what I think is needed to keep the rhythm of the poem going. Hope this is of some help.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2012
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Thank you! I appreciate your review. I guess it all depends on how you read it, like for instance the word"treasuring" I say with two syllables like you have it so I guess I just assumed everyone does. Thank you for taking time with it. I appreciate your thoughts!