The Heir Apparent
Viewing comments for Chapter 17 " The Decision"A family learns their father is a serial killer
30 total reviews
Comment from Belinda
Hi, Sasha, this is not a 'juicy' chapter but interesting, informative and important for the continuation of the story. It is written with clarity so I do not have any difficulty in understanding the law ... :)
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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Hi, Sasha, this is not a 'juicy' chapter but interesting, informative and important for the continuation of the story. It is written with clarity so I do not have any difficulty in understanding the law ... :)
Comment Written 15-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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That was my hope. I patterned this after two specific cases and it was very complicated. I am glad I was able to present it in a clear and understandable manner.
Comment from c_lucas
Sometimes, the Law in the early West was best. Even into the early thirties, the law throughout the country had ways of inducing confessions. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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Sometimes, the Law in the early West was best. Even into the early thirties, the law throughout the country had ways of inducing confessions. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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In this case I think even I would be willing to pull the switch. Glad you liked this one.
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In 1910, they chained a killer inside a outhouse and set it on fire.
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Now that would definitely send a point...I hope he was guilty of whatever he was charged with!!
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I don't know the details and Mother was going on five. It was the talk of the community. She must have heard about it in her teenage years. Judge Rob Bean would be an interesting character to google. One of my favorite stories is when he faced down a lynch mob with a twelve gauge. "This gentleman will get a fair trial in my court tonight. We'll hang the son-of-a-bitch in the morning."
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I have read several story about Judge Bean, he was a tough, no nonsense guy and not one you wanted to go up against.
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When he lost the relection, he kept his position by means of a shotgun.
Comment from sgalletti
Great chapter Sasha! I loved the questioning about the appropriate punishment (death penalty is contentious, for sure) and the final judgment seemed fair (although I would love to see them left in the mainstream so others can do what the justice system can not LOL!). Perfectly written with one very small nit ("...accept Mt. Mathews offer and..." - need an apostrophe in Mathew's to show possessive). Looking forward to reading what goes on at the cabin. I lived in Kirkland, you know LOL! Hugs, Sue
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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Great chapter Sasha! I loved the questioning about the appropriate punishment (death penalty is contentious, for sure) and the final judgment seemed fair (although I would love to see them left in the mainstream so others can do what the justice system can not LOL!). Perfectly written with one very small nit ("...accept Mt. Mathews offer and..." - need an apostrophe in Mathew's to show possessive). Looking forward to reading what goes on at the cabin. I lived in Kirkland, you know LOL! Hugs, Sue
Comment Written 15-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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Thanks for catching that one. I didn't know you live in Kirkland. I lived in Kirkland many years ago then moved to Redmond before coming to Mazatlan. Beautiful city, it least it was the last time I was there.
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Yep! I lived in an apartment right on the beach after the divorce from my first husband. It was a beautiful city! Hugs, Sue
Comment from InterestingRon
Hi Smurphy
Another great episode.
Each chapter adds further insights into the emotional makeup of the family.
I wonder if going to the cabin is going to be ominous?
Ron
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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Hi Smurphy
Another great episode.
Each chapter adds further insights into the emotional makeup of the family.
I wonder if going to the cabin is going to be ominous?
Ron
Comment Written 15-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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Thanks again for the positive review and continued support.
Comment from Laurie Clayton
I enjoyed reading this chapter.
Your narrative flowed almost effortlessly throughout most of the story.
The only thing that made me falter slightly was one section of dialogue which I felt could be tighter. I am refering to the passage that starts;
["Yes, we could have proceeded with just the six murders...] and ends;
[provide closure for the families who have suffered." ]
As I was reading, it felt as though there were too many repetative words/phrases, however, this is just a personal thought, feel free to ignore if you wish.
Despite this, I still found it to be a compelling read.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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I enjoyed reading this chapter.
Your narrative flowed almost effortlessly throughout most of the story.
The only thing that made me falter slightly was one section of dialogue which I felt could be tighter. I am refering to the passage that starts;
["Yes, we could have proceeded with just the six murders...] and ends;
[provide closure for the families who have suffered." ]
As I was reading, it felt as though there were too many repetative words/phrases, however, this is just a personal thought, feel free to ignore if you wish.
Despite this, I still found it to be a compelling read.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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Thanks, that is a good point. I will go back over that section and see if I can clean it up.
Comment from RKagan
James is trying to be so strong, but although he is very smart, he is just a kid too. Your insight into each character is tender and real. This is coming along beautifully.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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James is trying to be so strong, but although he is very smart, he is just a kid too. Your insight into each character is tender and real. This is coming along beautifully.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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Thank you very much. I am pleased you like this.
Comment from RebelRose
This is another great chapter. Great dialogue and description of scenes and characters is good. I saw no errors and enjoyed the read. Very well done.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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This is another great chapter. Great dialogue and description of scenes and characters is good. I saw no errors and enjoyed the read. Very well done.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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Thank you. I am pleased you liked this one. We are getting very close to the major changes to the original draft. Hope you like them too.
Comment from words
Loved it.
I have fears about the boys going to the cabin, I do think I remember that some evidence is found at this cabin and this many not be the get-away the boys hope for.
I would love to hear your story of when you gave a similar press conference to the one James gave in the last chapter.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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Loved it.
I have fears about the boys going to the cabin, I do think I remember that some evidence is found at this cabin and this many not be the get-away the boys hope for.
I would love to hear your story of when you gave a similar press conference to the one James gave in the last chapter.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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This is the chapter where I make major changes but I think you will still like it. When I get a chance I'll PM you about the press conference, being on Geraldo Revera's show and walking off the Jerry Spriger Show, definitely one of my proudest moments!
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Oh, sounds like delicious fun. Would have been nice if you had given Springer and resounding slap. LOL
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He was standing too far away, but believe me the thought did occur...
Comment from animatqua
This is a riviting and well told story. I think it's probably one of the few times the criminal justice system has been viewed from the perspective of the family of the criminal. These things need to be said and heard. You are doing a very good job of putting them down so they can be.
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reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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This is a riviting and well told story. I think it's probably one of the few times the criminal justice system has been viewed from the perspective of the family of the criminal. These things need to be said and heard. You are doing a very good job of putting them down so they can be.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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This is scary....I thought this was still in preview mode. I a thrilled you liked it.
Comment from adewpearl
it was finally aired it at - drop the second "it"
I chuckled silently, realizing - add comma
Although, I was convinced - drop the comma
You depict the various reactions to the news of the plea agreement well, Valerie - not everyone, even in the same family, is going to react the same way, and you make your story more realistic and compelling by showing how each of these family members is also an individual with his or her own sense of what constitutes justice. Brooke
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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it was finally aired it at - drop the second "it"
I chuckled silently, realizing - add comma
Although, I was convinced - drop the comma
You depict the various reactions to the news of the plea agreement well, Valerie - not everyone, even in the same family, is going to react the same way, and you make your story more realistic and compelling by showing how each of these family members is also an individual with his or her own sense of what constitutes justice. Brooke
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2011
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This was supposed to be in preview mode...glad you caught the spags. In the research did for this book, I found families seldom held the same opinion on innocence, guilt, or the proper punishment. It is so sad how something like this can tear a family apart. Glad you liked this one.