Flash Fiction
Viewing comments for Chapter 33 "Who Surprised Who?"Collection of Flash, Micro, etc.
32 total reviews
Comment from BlueJamme
Hi there,
I understand how this one must've been edited down to within an inch of its life, but I think the story was just too big for the 150 word limit. I liked the start, but had to read the ending 3 or 4 times to get what was going on - and I'm still not sure I do to be honest!
As with all these entries though, well done for getting all those words in to the story - I applaud you for that!
BlueJamme
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
Hi there,
I understand how this one must've been edited down to within an inch of its life, but I think the story was just too big for the 150 word limit. I liked the start, but had to read the ending 3 or 4 times to get what was going on - and I'm still not sure I do to be honest!
As with all these entries though, well done for getting all those words in to the story - I applaud you for that!
BlueJamme
Comment Written 04-May-2010
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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BlueJamme,
Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from JudithMarie
Very creative story using the words assigned. Your story has a nice flow and the conversations are natural. I was drawn from beginning to end wanting to know where I was going...I enjoyed the twist at the end. Good entry. Good writing. JudithMarie
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
Very creative story using the words assigned. Your story has a nice flow and the conversations are natural. I was drawn from beginning to end wanting to know where I was going...I enjoyed the twist at the end. Good entry. Good writing. JudithMarie
Comment Written 04-May-2010
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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Judith,
Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from MizKat
This is a sentimental love story that is wonderful and it held my interest throughout. What a shock that she went to the wrong house. What a surprise at the end. Great job!!!
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
This is a sentimental love story that is wonderful and it held my interest throughout. What a shock that she went to the wrong house. What a surprise at the end. Great job!!!
Comment Written 04-May-2010
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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Kat,
Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from The Wood Work
This was a great short surprise story. Well done. You had me from the first line. I truly hope you win this contest. I love to be surprise and this one did! thank you and keep writing...
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
This was a great short surprise story. Well done. You had me from the first line. I truly hope you win this contest. I love to be surprise and this one did! thank you and keep writing...
Comment Written 04-May-2010
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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The Wood Work,
Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Judian James
This has been such a fun contest to follow. This is another good one. I loved, "Still stinging, I sent him a single black rose. My note suggested he rot in hell. I wasn't a desperate woman" good job with an interesting list of words.
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
This has been such a fun contest to follow. This is another good one. I loved, "Still stinging, I sent him a single black rose. My note suggested he rot in hell. I wasn't a desperate woman" good job with an interesting list of words.
Comment Written 04-May-2010
reply by the author on 06-May-2010
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Jude,
Glad you enjoyed this little bit of fun. Thank you so much for the kind comments. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Krugerrand
Oops! Getting the address right is sooooooo important.
I didn't quite understand why he was apologizing. Was he the one who spilled the red wine?
Really nice twist at the end!
Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 04-May-2010
Oops! Getting the address right is sooooooo important.
I didn't quite understand why he was apologizing. Was he the one who spilled the red wine?
Really nice twist at the end!
Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 04-May-2010
reply by the author on 04-May-2010
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Krugerrand
It spewed from his mouth all over the place when she told him she was pregnant...Not exactly the reaction she anticipated.
Thanks for the kind review...Smiles to you
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Ahhhhhhhh, okay. A surprise reaction indeed.
Comment from btruax
Nice job using all the words and great dialogue. This was a very interesting challenge and you used the words in a way that felt very natural.
reply by the author on 04-May-2010
Nice job using all the words and great dialogue. This was a very interesting challenge and you used the words in a way that felt very natural.
Comment Written 04-May-2010
reply by the author on 04-May-2010
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btruax,
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. I appreciate the comments. Smiles to you...
Comment from rama devi
Excellent entry for the contest. Good flash fiction scenario with character, conflict and resolution well defined. The words blend in well too. No nits or spags. Excellent tightness in word economy.
Good luck. A good contender, I think.
Warmly, rd
reply by the author on 04-May-2010
Excellent entry for the contest. Good flash fiction scenario with character, conflict and resolution well defined. The words blend in well too. No nits or spags. Excellent tightness in word economy.
Good luck. A good contender, I think.
Warmly, rd
Comment Written 04-May-2010
reply by the author on 04-May-2010
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rd,
Thank you so much for the kind comments and the best wishes. I truly appreciate your encouragement and comments. Smiles to you
Comment from Shirley B
Very nice. You had me going. I had no idea, where this one was going. I was in suspense until the very end. I just knew he was going to kill her. Good luck in the contest. Great story, Shirley
reply by the author on 04-May-2010
Very nice. You had me going. I had no idea, where this one was going. I was in suspense until the very end. I just knew he was going to kill her. Good luck in the contest. Great story, Shirley
Comment Written 04-May-2010
reply by the author on 04-May-2010
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Shirley,
Thank you somuch for enjoying the little story. Glad it kept you guessing. Smiles to you...
Comment from RebelRose
What a surprise ending. A pleasant surprise I may add. Very well written and creative. This is a good contender for the writing prompt.
reply by the author on 04-May-2010
What a surprise ending. A pleasant surprise I may add. Very well written and creative. This is a good contender for the writing prompt.
Comment Written 04-May-2010
reply by the author on 04-May-2010
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Patty,
Thankyou so muchfor reading and for the generous comments. Smiles to you....