Comment from Max Edon

Excellent

I thought that this was a very lovely Haiku, even if it did make me feel sad. That is the point of Haiku, to evoke feelings. Good lick with the contest!

 Comment Written 10-Sep-2009

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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2009

Thank you for your kind review and thoughtful comments. I greatly appreciate it. Carol

reply by Max Edon on 10-Sep-2009

You are welcome!

Comment from Wild Flower

Excellent

I'm sorry for your daughters pain. It must be a very rough time for her and you. Nice job on the poem though. The art you chose to go with it is very nice too.

 Comment Written 10-Sep-2009

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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2009

Wild Flower

It is hard for her as well as the two children. You always want the best for your children, but life sometimes has other plans. Thanks so much for the kind review. Crol

Comment from Kit Minden

Excellent

Excellent senryu/haiku - can be either - leaves us questioning and leads to discussion and thought. Well done! As to your explanatory note, glad your daughter got to walk away sooner then, even if it was painful. Very hard to see our children in pain.

 Comment Written 10-Sep-2009

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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2009

Kit She still struggles and steps back toward him at times. I pray for her and my grandchildren she can slip from that grasp he has on her. Thank you for the kind review. CArol

reply by Kit Minden on 10-Sep-2009

My prayers are with you. Sounds odd perhaps, but consider whether her immune system is low. Amino acids help people who are depressed or coping with addictions. My email is kitminden@yahoo.com if I can help with any information. There's a book to start with called "The Mood Cure" that might help you get some ideas.

Comment from laurelp

Excellent

Oh, how sad. Marriage is a very difficult thing. Some make it but about one half of the people don't. Nicely written, you obviously have seen some that have failed.

 Comment Written 10-Sep-2009

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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2009

Laurel

Even the best of intentions won't work if the other half refuses to help. She is a good mom, almost finished with college and works a job too. He decided sitting at home was his choice and anger his second one. Thanks for the review. CArol

reply by laurelp on 10-Sep-2009

Sadly, it sounds like my own parents. My mother wanted more and went on to finish her education after we all graduated from college. It opened up a new world for her. My father preferred to sit at home and fall asleep in front of the tv. That was one of several big reasons why they divorced after 30 years of marriage.

Comment from MJMuraco

Excellent

Your haiku is awesome and a great entry for the contest. You convey a lot of emotion in such a few words. I'm sorry that your daughter had to go through this.

 Comment Written 10-Sep-2009

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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2009

MJMuraco I hope she can find the strength to escape his grasp. She has been with him 15 years since they were 15. They have two children and he has always been able to convince her he can change..When is what I ask?

Thanks for the kind review.

CArol

Comment from DecrepitOldBag

Excellent

Ah. I'm dealing with something very similar here at home with my son. Fortunately 'marriage' had not happened yet, even so, it hurts the same.

Very well conceived and written haiku.

Warmest wishes
Kat

 Comment Written 10-Sep-2009

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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2009

Kat

Thanks for the understanding. She has been with him 15 years...married two years. He convinced her that having the same name and their two children would change everything. It did...he got worse! Hope good things come to your son...Life is too short for all this pain, especially when you are young. Thanks for the review. Carol

Comment from cherry_rose

Excellent

Beautiful haiku. You've said so much in just a few words of the pain and heartache when someone tramples on another's feelings. It really hurts when it is your child that is affected.
cherry_

 Comment Written 10-Sep-2009

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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2009

Cherry

Thank you for the kind review and your gracious comments. Carol

Comment from AnnaLinda

Excellent

Begin Again,

Your Haiku poem and presentation is very powerful. This happens all too often, to so many couples! I am sorry to hear that it happened to your daughter. Hope she is doing well in spite of it.

Very well done!

SweetLinda

 Comment Written 10-Sep-2009

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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2009

Sweet Linda

Only time will tell and lots of love and understanding from family and friends. Thanks for your kind review. Carol

Comment from Nanny 6

Excellent

Your poem portrays the life cycle of love, starts out fresh and new, then the storms come and hard times, causing damage that can't be fixed. Well done. Judy

 Comment Written 10-Sep-2009

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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2009

Judy

Thanks for reading and reviewing my haiku. A poet I am not, but my daughter's pain seemed to deliver this one. Thanks again

Carol

Comment from Gert sherwood

Excellent

Hello Begin again
within you few lines I could feel the anguish and pain
wht a sad human nature hakiu( pathos poem)
The best to you.
Gert

 Comment Written 10-Sep-2009

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reply by the author on 10-Sep-2009

Gert Unfortunately, I think her pain is just beginning...but I know somewhere down the road there is a light! Thanks for the kind words. CArol

reply by Gert sherwood on 10-Sep-2009

Caro you are so welcome
I hope she finds a new love (SOON)
Gert