CSP: A Collection of Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "The Train"A collection of poetry
39 total reviews
Comment from Tedisking
I pictured myself at the edge of a train track in my car waiting for a train to go by and then the relief of the train finally getting out of my way and me getting to continue on my way. Nice poem it brought about great imagery.
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I pictured myself at the edge of a train track in my car waiting for a train to go by and then the relief of the train finally getting out of my way and me getting to continue on my way. Nice poem it brought about great imagery.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2009
Comment from Hitcher
You been busy while I've been sleeping friend, and I didn't even get an invite? Deep is the wound! Woe is Me!
I liked your Sopranos piece Sue, one could hear the train as it clattered down the track caboose and all. I'm just going to wander off and find some new friends to play with ...On The Tracks maybe!
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You been busy while I've been sleeping friend, and I didn't even get an invite? Deep is the wound! Woe is Me!
I liked your Sopranos piece Sue, one could hear the train as it clattered down the track caboose and all. I'm just going to wander off and find some new friends to play with ...On The Tracks maybe!
Comment Written 27-Mar-2009
Comment from Carol D Parker
Wow! You sure did a great job on this. It's like reading a story with some hidden meaning behind it. I love figuring it out. You use beautiful words, as usual. I love this one.
Carol
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Wow! You sure did a great job on this. It's like reading a story with some hidden meaning behind it. I love figuring it out. You use beautiful words, as usual. I love this one.
Carol
Comment Written 27-Mar-2009
Comment from jaeladarling
Stellar poem! I was a nanny for a while, and the 4-year-old boy I watched just LOVED trains. I used to take him to the local train station once or twice a week to watch the trains. One of the coolest things about it is that it's a station from the 1800's and it has a mini-museum inside of it with all kinds of cool things to look at. It's easy to sit on the bench outside the station and imagine yourself back in that time period.
Anyway, enjoyed this poem. Great work!
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Stellar poem! I was a nanny for a while, and the 4-year-old boy I watched just LOVED trains. I used to take him to the local train station once or twice a week to watch the trains. One of the coolest things about it is that it's a station from the 1800's and it has a mini-museum inside of it with all kinds of cool things to look at. It's easy to sit on the bench outside the station and imagine yourself back in that time period.
Anyway, enjoyed this poem. Great work!
Comment Written 27-Mar-2009
Comment from Alcuin
I can hear the train, feel its passing. Well invoked, and of course the poem flows beautifully. This review is apparently too short to be useful so I'll make it longer.
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I can hear the train, feel its passing. Well invoked, and of course the poem flows beautifully. This review is apparently too short to be useful so I'll make it longer.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2009
Comment from rhymelord
Dear Sue,
This one does not count in the Lioness/Hyena comp.. You did a remarkable job, on this very strange format, to create a rhythmic sequence of statements that do sound poetic and the alliteration is great.
Regards
Reg
PS Have a go at the next line -- it will only have 21 syllables.
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Dear Sue,
This one does not count in the Lioness/Hyena comp.. You did a remarkable job, on this very strange format, to create a rhythmic sequence of statements that do sound poetic and the alliteration is great.
Regards
Reg
PS Have a go at the next line -- it will only have 21 syllables.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2009
Comment from NightWriter
"The Train" read like a clickety-clack train racing down the tracks. Beautifully written, smooth to read, with a nice rhythm. Good luck!
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"The Train" read like a clickety-clack train racing down the tracks. Beautifully written, smooth to read, with a nice rhythm. Good luck!
Comment Written 26-Mar-2009
Comment from Soulester
Hi, Sixteezkid! This FIB is really touching. I just read about this new (to me) form and think it is fascinating. Thank you for sharing. It looks quite challenging!
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Hi, Sixteezkid! This FIB is really touching. I just read about this new (to me) form and think it is fascinating. Thank you for sharing. It looks quite challenging!
Comment Written 26-Mar-2009
Comment from glacierbabe
Sue, this is wondeful.
You did a fabulous job with the form.
I found nothing that needs improvment.
I really enjoyed this work.
Very well done. Best of luck in the contest.
Cheryl :)
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Sue, this is wondeful.
You did a fabulous job with the form.
I found nothing that needs improvment.
I really enjoyed this work.
Very well done. Best of luck in the contest.
Cheryl :)
Comment Written 26-Mar-2009
Comment from skye
Great picture. I have used it on one of mine... it is perfect for this short, succinct, and clever poem.
Nice structure, wonderful images.
Very well done.
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Great picture. I have used it on one of mine... it is perfect for this short, succinct, and clever poem.
Nice structure, wonderful images.
Very well done.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2009