Detour
Viewing comments for Chapter 39 "The End of the Road(trip)"Two very real women in not so real situation.
23 total reviews
Comment from marilyn quillen
Fantastic everything, thank you so much for the song. It was the perfect touch. great story, fantastic writing, some of the best storytelling I have read so far and everyone knows it take a good story teller u be a good writer and you are it!
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2024
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Fantastic everything, thank you so much for the song. It was the perfect touch. great story, fantastic writing, some of the best storytelling I have read so far and everyone knows it take a good story teller u be a good writer and you are it!
Comment Written 03-Nov-2024
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2024
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Thank you, Marilyn, so very much! I could not appreciate these words more. This song is near and dear to my heart. A voice student of mine and I did this one year for her Senior recital (at her request), and so I've always cherished it. I appreciate that you found it the "perfect touch" here, as well. That means the world. xoxox
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
Love the comparison of brown tracks down the side of the nose to dirt bike riders. Good imagery.
That Gretchen knows how to party! Under a table stuffing in meatballs and swilling booze out of a bottle:-)
To be clear, her recital would have taken place before a larger audience, but because she is returning home it is being presented at Maria's so that she might, at least, have the experience. Is that right?
Another great line: The drive to Lancaster is pensive, like the feeling in a hospital room before someone is wheeled away for open-heart surgery.
Ah, yes, the corn cobs - thanks for the visual reminder of one of the high points of comedy in your story.
This has been a very, very well executed story, made more interesting by the two-perspective way you and Gretchen have tackled it. I'll miss reading it each week.
It has the ending it was meant to have. I have one suggestion: an epilogue featuring Jane the Baby Babies. What happened to her after she was taken out of the food fight and into custody. Does she vow revenge? Or go quietly into the night?
Not sure how you top this one, Allen.
xoxo
Pam
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2024
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Love the comparison of brown tracks down the side of the nose to dirt bike riders. Good imagery.
That Gretchen knows how to party! Under a table stuffing in meatballs and swilling booze out of a bottle:-)
To be clear, her recital would have taken place before a larger audience, but because she is returning home it is being presented at Maria's so that she might, at least, have the experience. Is that right?
Another great line: The drive to Lancaster is pensive, like the feeling in a hospital room before someone is wheeled away for open-heart surgery.
Ah, yes, the corn cobs - thanks for the visual reminder of one of the high points of comedy in your story.
This has been a very, very well executed story, made more interesting by the two-perspective way you and Gretchen have tackled it. I'll miss reading it each week.
It has the ending it was meant to have. I have one suggestion: an epilogue featuring Jane the Baby Babies. What happened to her after she was taken out of the food fight and into custody. Does she vow revenge? Or go quietly into the night?
Not sure how you top this one, Allen.
xoxo
Pam
Comment Written 03-Nov-2024
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2024
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Oh, you're just being nice now because you don't want that dress to come back to you with holes where your (perky) nips go...
Yes, you're right; the four of us are there in that big recital hall because Rebecca was leaving "for good." But Maria wanted her to have the experience of performing.
No epilogue for Jane. None of us cares what has become of that horrible woman. We're all just glad it doesn't include anything in our lives!!
Thanks for the really nice review. xo
Comment from T B Botts
Hello Rachelle,
Wow! You sure know how to end a story gal. I'm sad on the one hand that it's over, but as the saying goes, all good things must come to an end. I was surprised, but pleasantly so, that Rebekah found where she wanted to be, and it's a pretty darn good place at that. I wish I could give you two sixes. This was really outstanding gal. It was so much fun to read. I hope you two artists collaborate again in the not too distant future. I'm so glad I was able to join you for the ride. Well done my friend.
Have a blessed evening.
Tom
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2024
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Hello Rachelle,
Wow! You sure know how to end a story gal. I'm sad on the one hand that it's over, but as the saying goes, all good things must come to an end. I was surprised, but pleasantly so, that Rebekah found where she wanted to be, and it's a pretty darn good place at that. I wish I could give you two sixes. This was really outstanding gal. It was so much fun to read. I hope you two artists collaborate again in the not too distant future. I'm so glad I was able to join you for the ride. Well done my friend.
Have a blessed evening.
Tom
Comment Written 03-Nov-2024
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2024
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I'm sad, too, Tom; I know what you're saying. But I'm happy that it had a happy ending for everyone - maybe even Jane; who knows (or CAAAAAAARES, right?!)
Thanks for this absolutely beautiful review. I could not appreciate it more. Thanks, too, for being so loyal about reading these chapters each week. It was wonderful to have you along for the "ride."
xoxoxo