Love Out of the Darkness
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Love Out of the Darkness"Grief has its stages.
29 total reviews
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Nicely written. You paint a very clear picture.
In case you are interested, in Word, you can make an em dash by hitting the dash after a space followed by another space. When you resume typing words, it changes automatically.
Best wishes.
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
  |
Nicely written. You paint a very clear picture.
In case you are interested, in Word, you can make an em dash by hitting the dash after a space followed by another space. When you resume typing words, it changes automatically.
Best wishes.
Comment Written 02-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing, Wayne. I'm thrilled you enjoyed it so much. I will be adding a part two soon--I needed to clarify some details with my uncle before starting. Oh, awesome to know. Thank you for sharing. Take care. :D :D
Comment from Begin Again
Good morning! It's 3 am where I am and I woke up struggling with a change in a chapter I am writing....that and a few other things. Strange how I sat down at the computer and discovered your lovely chapter... I instantly related to her frustrations and not wanting to confront all the pictures surrounding her. You did an awesome job of painting that picture for the reader.
Sorry to hear about your upcoming surgery (been there twice) and your toe. Hope the horizon holds better things for you. Thanks for sharing your story and I look forward to reading more.
Have a great day!
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
|
Good morning! It's 3 am where I am and I woke up struggling with a change in a chapter I am writing....that and a few other things. Strange how I sat down at the computer and discovered your lovely chapter... I instantly related to her frustrations and not wanting to confront all the pictures surrounding her. You did an awesome job of painting that picture for the reader.
Sorry to hear about your upcoming surgery (been there twice) and your toe. Hope the horizon holds better things for you. Thanks for sharing your story and I look forward to reading more.
Have a great day!
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 02-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing, Carol. I'm thrilled you enjoyed it so much. I will be adding a part two soon--I needed to clarify some details with my uncle before starting. I hope your story changes aren't giving you too much trouble anymore. I'm seeing a doctor about my toe today and my eye surgery is next Tuesday. Fingers crossed both go well. Thank you again and take care. :D :D
-
Hope all goes well! I'll keep you in my prayers.
Comment from Nicki.B
I really liked this story and I'm looking forward to seeing part 2! It really shows just how one has to work so hard with their thoughts to no go to a dark place especially when grieving, really good chapter.well done
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
|
I really liked this story and I'm looking forward to seeing part 2! It really shows just how one has to work so hard with their thoughts to no go to a dark place especially when grieving, really good chapter.well done
Comment Written 02-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing, Nicki. I'm thrilled you enjoyed it so much. I will be adding a part two soon--I needed to clarify some details with my uncle before starting. Thank you again and take care. :D :D
Comment from Michele Harber
First, good luck with your cataract surgery. I hope it goes well and, also, that your toe isn't broken. I once stress-fractured an ankle the night before going to Jamaica, and still managed to have a very nice time, so I'm glad you didn't let your issues spoil your vacation.
Regarding your story, I found it very believable in its depiction of writer's block, and how memories manage to invade your consciousness, even when words won't. Of course, there's nothing more relatable than a slow computer that just won't let you do the work you need to get done.
I enjoyed your use of a larger font to express your character's inner thoughts.
Knowing that this is only the first part of the story, your closing line, "The screen door slammed shut with a resounding bang," is perfect. The line itself is descriptive and powerful, but also serves as a great cliffhanger, leaving the reader to wonder what she encounters on the other side of the door.
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
|
First, good luck with your cataract surgery. I hope it goes well and, also, that your toe isn't broken. I once stress-fractured an ankle the night before going to Jamaica, and still managed to have a very nice time, so I'm glad you didn't let your issues spoil your vacation.
Regarding your story, I found it very believable in its depiction of writer's block, and how memories manage to invade your consciousness, even when words won't. Of course, there's nothing more relatable than a slow computer that just won't let you do the work you need to get done.
I enjoyed your use of a larger font to express your character's inner thoughts.
Knowing that this is only the first part of the story, your closing line, "The screen door slammed shut with a resounding bang," is perfect. The line itself is descriptive and powerful, but also serves as a great cliffhanger, leaving the reader to wonder what she encounters on the other side of the door.
Comment Written 02-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing, Michele. I'm thrilled you enjoyed it so much. I will be adding a part two soon--I needed to clarify some details with my uncle before starting. I'm seeing a doctor about my toe today, and my eye surgery is next Tuesday. Fingers crossed, both go well. Thank you again and take care. :D :D
-
You're very welcome. I've got my toes and eyes crossed for your toe and eyes. (You didn't damage any fingers, so no sense crossing them. 😂)
Comment from Mark Stephen O'Neal
This was a great read. I could feel her mind racing while she dealt with her writer's block and relationship issues. I could also feel her pain, as it's nearly impossible to focus on anything when matters of the heart are involved.
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
|
This was a great read. I could feel her mind racing while she dealt with her writer's block and relationship issues. I could also feel her pain, as it's nearly impossible to focus on anything when matters of the heart are involved.
Comment Written 02-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing, Mark. I'm thrilled you enjoyed it so much. I will be adding a part two soon--I needed to clarify some details with my uncle before starting. Thank you again and take care. :D :D
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
This was written very well and has me wondering where you are going with the story. It sounds like you have really been going through some things. I hope you can get back to writing very soon and that your surgery goes well. good job on this.
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
|
This was written very well and has me wondering where you are going with the story. It sounds like you have really been going through some things. I hope you can get back to writing very soon and that your surgery goes well. good job on this.
Comment Written 02-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing, Marilyn. I'm thrilled you enjoyed it so much. I will be adding a part two soon--I needed to clarify some details with my uncle before starting. I'm seeing a doctor about my toe today, and my eye surgery is next Tuesday. Fingers crossed, both go well. Thank you again and take care. :D :D
Comment from Aussie
She didn't want to write that assignment, tried everything to dodge the work. I found a lot of personal feelings come through this well written story. Tell me why you concentrate on all the negative things that have happened in your life? Memories need happy times too. No one ever dies, they are waiting for you. K xx
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
 |
She didn't want to write that assignment, tried everything to dodge the work. I found a lot of personal feelings come through this well written story. Tell me why you concentrate on all the negative things that have happened in your life? Memories need happy times too. No one ever dies, they are waiting for you. K xx
Comment Written 01-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing, Aussie. I'm thrilled you enjoyed it so much--and I owe you thanks, as you motivated me to write and post. I will be adding a part two soon--I needed to clarify some details with my uncle before starting. You raise a great question, but unfortunately, I can't answer it. Near as I can figure, I focus on the negative aspects, so I can give my characters the happily ever after they deserve. Thank you again and take care. :D :D
Comment from jmdg1954
Intriguing. I was reading and waiting for this to turn into a science fiction type story (one of my lessor favorite genres).
The story line kept me reading and reading ahead wanting to know what's next.
I guess I'll have to wait..
Second to last line correction-
grabbed her keys, locked the door, and fed (fled).
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
|
Intriguing. I was reading and waiting for this to turn into a science fiction type story (one of my lessor favorite genres).
The story line kept me reading and reading ahead wanting to know what's next.
I guess I'll have to wait..
Second to last line correction-
grabbed her keys, locked the door, and fed (fled).
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 01-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing, jmdg1954. I'm thrilled you enjoyed it so much. I will be adding a part two soon--I needed to clarify some details with my uncle before starting. No, I don't write science fiction. I'll read it, but I don't know if I'm capable of world creating like that. I'm more of a fantasy/realistic fiction writer. Thank you for pointing out the error and again for reading and reviewing. Take care. :D :D
Comment from royowen
What a fascinating story, writing can be the most frustrating thing sometimes, but quite often I make partial writes and can't finish them, (that's why I have several notebooks full of partial works, I don't anything away) I can truly identify with your story, well dine, blessings Roy
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
|
What a fascinating story, writing can be the most frustrating thing sometimes, but quite often I make partial writes and can't finish them, (that's why I have several notebooks full of partial works, I don't anything away) I can truly identify with your story, well dine, blessings Roy
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 01-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
-
Thank you for reading and reviewing, Roy. I'm thrilled you enjoyed it so much. I will be adding a part two soon--I needed to clarify some details with my uncle before starting. Oh, I can relate to the partial writing, too. I have several Word documents and multiple notes on my phone when inspiration struck for a brief moment. Thank you again and take care. :D :D
-
Well done