A Wailing Croon
Tercets ~ Terza Rima26 total reviews
Comment from JSD
This is great. Well done for responding so effectively to this quite complex prompt. The language is powerful and the symbolism really interesting. I think you could do well with this.
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
  |
This is great. Well done for responding so effectively to this quite complex prompt. The language is powerful and the symbolism really interesting. I think you could do well with this.
Comment Written 20-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
-
Hello there! Thank you so very much for your encouraging review. I really appreciate it!!
Melissa
Comment from Janis M.
This is truly beautiful! I like how each stanza builds on the other. I love the last verses the best about losing shackles to the earth. I probably could have been more clear in the rules, but for this contest I only meant for three lines in only one stanza.
However I would hate for you to lost this beautiful poem. Do you think you would be able to shorten it for the competition but then after it is over, you could add the rest of it again?
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
|
This is truly beautiful! I like how each stanza builds on the other. I love the last verses the best about losing shackles to the earth. I probably could have been more clear in the rules, but for this contest I only meant for three lines in only one stanza.
However I would hate for you to lost this beautiful poem. Do you think you would be able to shorten it for the competition but then after it is over, you could add the rest of it again?
Comment Written 20-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
-
Hello Janis. Thank you for your comments on the verse. When I saw the words 'Tercet Trifecta', I assumed it meant three stanzas. And when you added the additional requirements of internal rhyme, metaphor and including nature, animals and humans, I was certain it was more than one stanza because that is a lot of requirements for three lines. Why not leave it open to interpretation and see what happens :). Thanks.
Melissa
-
Certainly, I?ll probably just update the rules in a thread, that way people know they can.
It was definitely meant to be a challenge!
Comment from RodG
I like how your Terza Rima tells a tale in interlocking Tercets. We can easily visualize the Speaker walking through the woods at night as wolves bay at the moon. Then he hears a loon and his shackles are released. I often think of Nature freeing us to commune with her in a natural setting. Subtle use of internal rhyme in stanza 2. I liked this a lot. Ro
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
|
I like how your Terza Rima tells a tale in interlocking Tercets. We can easily visualize the Speaker walking through the woods at night as wolves bay at the moon. Then he hears a loon and his shackles are released. I often think of Nature freeing us to commune with her in a natural setting. Subtle use of internal rhyme in stanza 2. I liked this a lot. Ro
Comment Written 20-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
-
Hello Rod. Thank you so much. I like to envision myself walking in the woods and hearing nature all around. I really appreciate your thoughts on this verse ~ so glad you liked it. :)
Melissa
Comment from Wy Jung
Oh wow. Very well done. I'd not heard of Tercets before. ...like you, I am learning all sorts of new forms of poetic metre here on Fanstory. I've also found a wonderful community here. At the end, I pictured an old man making shackles, then read it again and see that the man-made shackles are old... not the man who made them.
Nice to see a fellow word-lover at work. Cheers.
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
|
Oh wow. Very well done. I'd not heard of Tercets before. ...like you, I am learning all sorts of new forms of poetic metre here on Fanstory. I've also found a wonderful community here. At the end, I pictured an old man making shackles, then read it again and see that the man-made shackles are old... not the man who made them.
Nice to see a fellow word-lover at work. Cheers.
Comment Written 20-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
-
Hello Wy. Thank you so much. I enjoy writing poetry and hope to get better over time... there is always such good feedback here on FS. I really appreciate your comments. If you are interested in more poetic forms, there is a website called shadow poetry.com. It's very helpful.
Melissa
Comment from judiverse
This is excellent. You really had a handle on the prompt with your rhyme and internal rhyme and take on nature with the night and bring in the wolf. Then you relate to human nature with the feeling of being as one with nature. Great work, and it's a continuation of your winning ways, so best of luck in the contest. Merry Christmas and all the best of this wonderful season. judi
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
|
This is excellent. You really had a handle on the prompt with your rhyme and internal rhyme and take on nature with the night and bring in the wolf. Then you relate to human nature with the feeling of being as one with nature. Great work, and it's a continuation of your winning ways, so best of luck in the contest. Merry Christmas and all the best of this wonderful season. judi
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
-
Thank you very much, Judi. I have been out of touch with my writing and it feels so good to pen something that forced me to take deep breaths and relax. I've been so busy. I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and hugs to you, dear friend.
Melissa
-
You're very welcome. I think the quality of your writing is excellent, and that's more important than the quantity. judi
Comment from TPAC
An Indian warrior, connecting with the sky and ground, sensing past ancestry with those elders: joined together in harmony. A wonderful conveyance in my given opinion.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
|
An Indian warrior, connecting with the sky and ground, sensing past ancestry with those elders: joined together in harmony. A wonderful conveyance in my given opinion.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
-
Thank you for your lovely review! I really appreciate it.
Melissa